Why Americans Should Pay More for Fuel by Thoughtful Puppet (funny books to read txt) 📕

These days the price of fuel is discussed on every news broadcast, legislated on at every senate session, ranted against over every family meal, and even made a part of most stand-up comedy routines.
When you’re carpooling to work (to save on fuel, of course), the guy in your passenger seat probably grumbles about it every day. Don’t be that guy (or girl, whatever your case may be). It’s just so trendy these days to hate the price of fuel- and nobody likes to be constantly reminded of things they already know. So here are three irrefutable lines of logic to break the trend and start your own; a trio of tremendous reasons to be happy to pay more than we already do to fill our cars and heat our homes.

1. Tony Hayward needs a new car. Just look at all of the stress, pressure, and scrutiny we put him under for that silly little spill down in the Gulf. Clearly he had nothing to do with the mishap in the fist place and obviously he did everything in his power to put things back in order as quickly as possible. So we owe him an apology. And what says, “We’re sorry for all the trouble and really hope this makes you feel better” than a shiny new Bugatti Veyron with a vanity plate that reads “BIGOIL”. Granted, his last salary in the employ of BP was more than sufficient to purchase four of the 1.3 million dollar beauties, but I still think it would be a nice gesture.

2. Everyone else is doing it. Take a gander at http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2011/05/gas-prices-around-the-world-cheaper-than-water-i-and-i-10-a-gallon/238226/ and you’ll quickly agree with me that Americans aren’t paying nearly enough for good ol’ petrol. I would much rather be over in Copenhagen where I could be privileged to pay $10/gallon; provided of course I was one of the thirty percent or so of citizens proud to possess their own vehicle.

3. It’s so rare. Many analysts are sure that well within fifty years we will have no more oil at all. Sure we’ll still have lots of clean coal, scentless natural gas, and traces of sun, wind, and other renewable resources, but no more oil. And with technologycreeping along as slowly as it is we surely won’t be ready to use those other resources on such short notice. Think about it- way back on April 29, 1899 a speed record of 105.88 km/h (or 65.79 mph) was reached in a “rocket shaped” electric vehicle invented by Camille Jenatzy. In the almost 113 years following this notable event, we still look at “alternate fuel vehicles” as new.

In summary we should all be grateful that we continue to pay an increasing amount for our fuel. We support those who are wealthy and downtrodden; we join the elite ranks of the European club; and we’ll only have the honor for a few more decades. Enjoy it while you can.

Publication Date: 02-03-2012

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