Damaged by Sophie Bramberger (books you need to read .txt) 📕

This is a project for my Creative Writing Class.

All characters in the stories are fictive, none of the events are based on what happened to me or anyone I know, neither what I feel, did or want to do.

I hope you enjoy reading it, even though they are all kind of sad.

- Sophie B.

- and nothing else matters -

Wearing fifteen centimeter high heels, I teetered slowly along the strip. It was cold, the wind made goose bumps appear on my arms and legs. But I couldn't wear more than this mini skirt and the lace bra. I wasn't allowed to.
Though, I wrapped my arms around my body. At the moment there was nobody there, nobody who could choose me.
Just one second after I thought that, headlights blended my eyes and I closed them for a moment. Quickly, I unwrapped me, flipped my brown hair over my shoulder so that it fell in light waves down to my waist. I pulled in my stomach and pressed my boobs out. Then I put on a seductive smile and went a few steps to the car. The other girls around me did the same. A part of me wished that the car would stop at one of them. But the other part was also present, and so I continued fixing the car which really came and stopped next to me. The driver lowered the window on my side.
“Hello, Beautiful,” he babbled. I could smell the alcohol till over here and swallowed.
“Hey, there,” I replied blinking.
“What do you cost?”
I told him, and he leaned over and opened the door. “Get in.”
For I heart beat, I closed my eyes. Why? Why me? Think of the money. Think of Lisa.
I took a deep breath and got in the car.
As soon as I sat, the dirty hand of the man was on my thigh. He gave me a nasty smile, where I could see his teeth. One in the front was missing, the others were kind of a yellow-white-brown mix. Again I swallowed.
He sped the car up, driving about five minutes away. Then he stopped at a lonely place out of town. It was coal black outside, when he turned off the car. Nobody was out there. Just me and him
He pointed at the back seat, but when I wanted to leave the car to change seats, he locked it.
“Baby, it’s much sexier if you go through here.” He pointed between the two front seats.
Okay, that was not so bad. I slipped off my shoes and started climbing back. Suddenly I felt hands on my butt, tearing my skirt and tanga off. I closed my eyes and a think clop formed in my throat. Lisa. I could do it.
Finally, I reached the back seat, and he also climbed back. His greedy sight was stuck on my boobs, his nasty fingers followed soon. He removed my bra quickly, his fingers seemed to burn on my skin. It hurt.
For Lisa.
His body on mine, he also naked. Heat. Pain. Lisa.
After a way too long time, it eventually was over. He dressed himself again and I took my clothes with trembling hands.
He drove me back in silence, gave me my money and left me on the strip.
My whole body was shaking as I went home in the cold night. From fear, from the cold.
As I closed my door at home., I saw a little child waiting for me.
It was holding a soft blanket, one finger in the mouth and stared at me with big eyes. A relieved sigh left my chest. I hurried to Lisa and hugged her tight.
“Hey, Sweetie. I’m home, everything’s fine.”
And everything was fine. For a moment, the man in the car was forgotten. All the men before him and all the ones that would follow, just blown away.
Nothing mattered yet. Nothing, but my beloved little child.

- when everything just disappears -

When I started to dress up I had no idea about what would happen the next hours.
With a smile on my face I turned in front of the mirror. The dress was really, really short and tight, it showed more than it hid.
A whistle sounded behind me. “Wow! You look stunning!”
I turned and saw my friend Mary, she wore a black dress which was a little bit longer than mine, the hem at its edge caressed almost her knees.
“Hey, thanks. But you, too!”
“Thank you.” She came over and gave me a short hug. “Am I the first?”
I approved and we waited for everybody else to come, then I called a cab which drove us to the festival. Summer Splash.
How long have I been looking forward to this day? Now that I finally turned sixteen, my parents allowed me to go.
In the car we started drinking, Coke White, what nobody of us really liked. But we didn't care, it was alcohol and made us being drunk, that was the main thing.
After the fifth gallon was emptied, I started giggling. “Heeey guuuys… Maybe we should save a little bit for the festival! You know, the drinks there will be soo expensive!” I widened my eyes and tried a serious face, but my friends just laughed. Only Laura took one of the rest bottles and put it into her bag. “Chill, girl. We have enough.”
When the cab stopped we quickly got out of it, I paid the driver and we threw ourselves in the action.
Already after a few minutes, we met the boys from our class. They also seemed to be very drunk, and so the usual tensions between us disappeared. We spent a few hours with them, then we split without me realizing it. Suddenly, all of my friends were gone. I looked around me. “Guuuys!! Where aaare youuu?” Nobody answered, so I just sighed and went to the next bar. People bumped into me, I fell down a few times, but finally I sat on a chair.
“One Vodka Shot, please,” I shouted at the barman. The others had our alcohol and I didn't want to get sober.
“Hey, Kathy?!” Somebody grabbed my shoulder and turned me around.
“Tiiim, heeey! ‘sup?”
“You’re so drunk, girl!” He laughed.
Just that moment I got my Vodka, as to underline the situation. Quickly I drank it on ex.
“Nooo, I'm not! Youuu are!”
I let my head fall against his chest and he caught me.
“'Course. C'mon, I show you something?”
His eyes flickered.
Giggling I hang up on him and we left the bar. He pulled me through the mass of people till we were a little bit outside.
It was darker here, nobody placed as many lights as on the main ground.
Suddenly I heard a few people talking; they were the only ones here except Tim and me. And they were coming closer.
“Hey!” Tim seemed to know them; he parried one after the other. I hang the whole time on his right arm and nobody really realized me.
“Can I have a little bit?” Tim asked and looked around. The guys laughed.
“Sure, bro.” One of them grabbed in his pocket and took a little thing out of it. I couldn't really see what it was because everything was so damn blurred. But it seemed to be a little plastic bag.
Tim seemed to know what it was because he just grabbed it and gave the boy something else. It happened so fast that I couldn't really realize what it was, but I didn't care. One moment later, the boys were gone and Tim and I alone.
“You have luck that I got it!” he whispered and I leaned forward to him to understand his word.
“Got… what?”
He just smiled at me. “You’ll see. I’m sure you’ll like it!”
Carefully he fiddled about the plastic bag and handed me a little white thing. I guessed it was a pill or something. Maybe it was sweet! I tossed it in my mouth and swallowed it quickly. To my disappointment, the pill didn't taste like anything. It was just neutral.
Tim also took one and we went back. We found the others and danced, drank a lot and then it happened. I already was drunk, so I didn't make a big deal about seeing everything double and feeling a little confused, but the second the DJ changed the song, suddenly a heat wave fluted my whole body. I gasped, my eyes widened. I had stopped dancing, my friends and everybody else still did.
Everybody was around me, dancing, moving, shouting. They were coming closer. Looking at me. Touching me. Closer. Heat.
Everything in my head was turning. My head was turning, the room was turning. Turning. Swat showed on my forehead, adrenalin pumped through my veins. My heart beat. Fast. Faster. I tried to find a way out of here. My eyes flew over the people, but there was no space. Just people. Arms around me, hair, faces, bodies. My hands went to my head, trying to hold it. Holding it together, holding me together. But everybody was still here, was close. I couldn't escape. Helplessness climbed my body, claustrophobia appeared. Heat. Closeness. Turning. Faster, no air. Gasping. Help. Faster.
Exploding.
My legs gave in and I fell down. The ground was hard, sticky. Feet. The turning stopped. I saw so many colors. Disco light. Heat. Bright. Blending. And that noise. Music, horribly loud music. Beats. Headache. Help. Pain. I closed my eyes, hyperventilating. And then everything stopped.
I didn't feel the heat, all the people seemed to disappear. Adrenalin vanished, my heart beat slowed down. Colors changed to black. One breath. Long. Pause. Breath.
My heart slowed. Slower. Breath. Slower. Stop.
And then everything was just … nothing.