La La by Kim Lenor (ap literature book list txt) 📕

dying with him or living for myself and without him but I loved him too much to leave him.

Late one night while Sysco was driving me home from the studio the cops pulled us over. He had a bag of rocks on him and he passed them to me to stuff in my panty before the cop got out of his car. My heart was beating fast and I was trying to look and act normal but all I could imagine was my ass going to jail. I couldn’t believe that Sysco had put me in that situation. To him it wasn’t shit because guys did it all the time and they think that since their bitch doesn’t have a record that if she gets caught that she will get off easier. Reluctantly, I did as he asked because I knew that Sysco had felonies out the ass and was on probation so if he got caught he was going to do some time and I certainly didn't want that.
After the cop wrote Sysco a ticket for a broken taillight and left, I went off, “Sysco, what the hell was that? Why would you be carrying around this shit and you know your taillight is broken?”

“I totally forgot about that, damn I’m sorry.”
“Don’t ever do that to me again!”

“So what are you saying, you wouldn’t look out for your man?”

“I would, you know that, but not when you are being careless. I don’t want to get in trouble.”

“La La you know you don’t question me, you just do what I say and I won’t let nothing happen to you. If you were to go to jail, you know I’d be bailing you out before you even made it downtown. I need to know you got my back, if you get shaky on me then this ain’t gonna work. I need a real bitch in my corner.”

“You know I got you Sysco but I just don’t like that. I mean, I got too much on me. Daisha, my mother, and Niecee would kill my ass as soon as you bailed me out of a jail anyway. Then too, I got goals, you know I’m not one of these hood rats. I’m going to be a superstar someday and nothing can ruin that. You know I was born to be a star, Starr is my last name!”

“You talk like I’m not going to get us there Miss Star,” he said sarcastically. “Who’s going to sing on my tracks? Nobody does it like La La… You my baby and I would never let anything happen to you or your familia. You see I’m blasting on any nigga trying to sell to your moms. Now that Bonita Niecee, yeah you going to have to deal with that chica! I think she can beat my ass.”

“Ahh that’s some funny shit right there! You right though.”

“You just gotta trust me mommy… My demo is almost done and I got my main dude ready to take it to his connect at the record company. He said he sure that they are going to sign me. So it’s just a matter of time but you gotta trust me. You trust me La La?”

“Yeah baby, you know I got you and I trust you.”

“Good… Now take care of Papi, all that excitement woke up hector,” he said as he pushed my head down into his lap.

I did trust Sysco but a part of me felt like I needed to do it on my own and not rely on him but without him I couldn’t pay for studio time. I knew that he would always take care of me but I also knew it could mean a lot of unnecessary trouble like jail, fights or other illegal and dangerous activities. Yeah I knew for sure he would pay my hospital bill if I got shot but what the hell did that mean if I was paralyzed and in a wheelchair for life, or yeah he would keep money on my books if I got sent to prison but what would that matter if I was in there for fifty years? I’d be locked up while some other bitch had taken my place and he was free to do whatever he wanted. Somehow that just didn’t add up to me and I thought about it day and night but like a script, each day we would start back at square one. Part of me wanted to let him go but I just didn’t know how.
Sysco finished his last track and we were all bopping our heads as we sat listening to it in the studio. At the end of the song we all started yelling and screaming and clapping because if that song wasn’t a hit then nothing else in the world was. That was it, it was done and one of Sysco’s friend suggested that we all go out to celebrate but Sysco said, “We not finished man.”

“What do you mean, those tracks are hot, they don’t need nothing else. We worked hard day and night so now we gotta celebrate. What else is there to do?”

“We gotta work hard day and night on my girl’s demo. It ain’t over, it has just begun.”

Everyone came back in the studio and took their places. Sysco had followed through, he wasn’t thinking about celebrating, he was only thinking about me starting my dream. I looked at him with wide eyes and hugged him tightly and he said as he slapped my ass, “Time is money La La, get your ass in that booth.”

By the end of the next day I was able to complete two tracks. The studio was packed with people just wanting to listen to me, even the owner Oddy was there and he never listened to any of the artists. He always had a thing for me and Sysco was just waiting for him to say or do the wrong thing. It was obvious that Oddy was a pervert from the way he looked at the girls in the studio or by the things he would say to them, but he never disrespected me. Sysco always joked about how he wanted to pop him one in his big blubber stomach just to see what would happen. Like the fat would miraculously catch the bullet and swallow it or something.

We were working on the third track when I noticed Sysco and his friend that he called his main dude from New York, Charlo in the corner talking. I started to get upset because neither of them was paying attention to me and Charlo had been missing from the studio pretty much all day so I stormed out of the booth and irritably said, “What’s up? I’m not feeling this song. The words are right but it’s something about that beat. These dudes are all about raps and rap beats, not what I’m trying to do and yawl not even paying any attention.”

“Calm down mommy we are going to take care of it,” Sysco insisted.

“What are yawl talking about Sysco?”

“Charlo has to go back to New York. His boss is going to be tied up for six months so he gotta get my demo to him as soon as possible.”
“Charlo! I need you! You can’t leave now, I got three tracks to go!”

“I'm so sorry but as soon as your demo is ready just send it to me and I guarantee you’ll get on, I know talent when I see it. But I had only planned to stay here three months and it turned into six so baby I gotta go. Best I can do is take the tracks you have and pitch them. Those are hot, especially since one is R&B and the other is Pop. You gotta finish the rest though because if they ask for more and they still not ready to see you, I’m gonna need to have the whole demo. You all got at least until the end of next month before Big Man leaves for six months and when he comes back he is going to be so swamped so I got to put all this on his plate before he leaves.”

“Charlo, don’t worry about it we are going to get on that. I promise you this shit is going to be done and right by the end of month. Her ass ain’t gonna sleep, she is going to eat, breath and shit this music. We on that! La La, I take care of you right?”

“Yeah Sysco but…”

“No buts, now get your ass back in that booth, we got work to do.”

I went back in the booth but I wanted to cry when I seen Charlo walk out that door. He was the only one in that room that really knew about beats and how to tweak things just right and besides Sysco he was the only other person in that room that seemed to care about my demo. I really became nervous but I just tried to stay focused and do my best to make what was coming out of my mouth hot. I tried to believe in it but something was missing and I just couldn’t put my finger on it.

Sysco didn’t lie though because we lived at that studio. He even gave me my seventeenth birthday party there and right after I blew out the candles he told me to get my ass back in that booth. He was serious and I was feeding off his determination so there was nowhere else I wanted to be but in that booth.

A little time had gone by and we were still stuck on the third track. I was frustrated as hell, Sysco was evil and frustrated and everyone else was sitting around looking as stupid as kindergartners in the twelfth grade. I was just about to hit that high note like Mariah when Sysco’s little sister Ana ran into the studio. I could tell from her facial expressions and the way that she was waiving her hands and yelling to me that something was wrong so I rushed out the booth to hear her yelling, “La La, your mother and your sister are in trouble! Hurry! Hurry!”

I took off out of the studio and Sysco followed me. Ana led us to a fight on the corner and as my eyes focused I could see Doe, the other big time drug dealer in our neighborhood with his arm around my sister’s throat restraining her while one of his hoe’s named China was beating on my mother. I felt my blood pressure hit the roof, and both Sysco and I started yelling and instantly the situation turned into mass chaos. The first thing I did was grab China by her weave from off the top of Sunny because she was pounding the shit out of my mother. I knew Sysco was about to deal with Doe so I wasn’t immediately worried about him having my sister. Then I noticed my buddy Ciara from elementary school was in the crowd and she put her head down in shame when we made eye contact. Even though she was a couple years older than me, I used to take up for her because she used to be very scrawny but really cute, and so all the big ugly husky girls picked on her. I had even got into a fight taking up for her one day and since then we somewhat kept in touch and every blue moon we spoke on the phone, so we were