Riders of the Silences by Max Brand (top 20 books to read .txt) 📕
"And if I done wrong then, I've got my share of hell-fire for it. Here I lie, with my boys, Bill and Bert, sitting around in the corner of the room waiting for me to go out. They ain't men, Pierre. They're wolves in the skins of men. They're the right sons of their mother. When I go out they'll grab the coin I've saved up, and leave me to lie here and rot, maybe.
"Lad, it's a fearful thing to die without having no one around that cares, and to know that even after I've gone out I'm going to lie here and have my dead eyes looking up at the ceiling. So I'm writing to you, Pierre, part to tell you what you ought to know; part because I got a sort of crazy idea that maybe you could get down here to me before I go out.
"You don't owe me nothing but hard words, Pierre; but if you don't try to come to me, the ghost of your mother will follow you all your life, lad, and you'll be seeing her blue eyes and the red-gold of her hair in the dark of the night as I see it now. Me, I
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traitor when he stands facing the firing-squad, watching the glimmer
of light go down the aimed rifles.
For she knew the face of the man who sat there counting; she knew how
the firelight flared in the dark red of his hair and made it seem like
another fire beneath which the blue of the eyes was strangely cold.
Her hand had gathered to a hard-balled fist.
“Eight—nine—”
She sprang up, screaming: “No, no, Pierre!” And threw out her arms to
him.
“Ten.”
She whispered: “It was the girl with yellow hair—Mary Brown.”
It was as if she had said: “Good morning!” in the calmest of voices.
There was no answer in him, neither word nor expression, and out of
ten sharp-eyed men, nine would have passed him by without noting the
difference; but the girl knew him as the monk knows his prayers or the
Arab his horse, and a solemn, deep despair came over her. She felt
like the drowning, when the water closes over their heads for the
last time.
He puffed twice again at the cigarette and then flicked the butt into
the fire. When he spoke it was only to say: “Did she stay long?”
But his eyes avoided her. She moved a little so as to read his face,
but when he turned again and answered her stare she winced. “Not very
long, Pierre.”
“Ah,” he said. “I see! It was because she didn’t dream that this was
the place I lived in.”
It was the sort of heartless, torturing questioning which was once the
crudest weapon of the inquisition. With all her heart she fought to
raise her voice above the whisper whose very sound accused her, but
could not. She was condemned to that voice as the man bound in
nightmare is condemned to walk slowly, slowly, though the terrible
danger is racing toward him, and the safety which he must reach lies
only a dozen steps, a dozen mortal steps away.
She said in that voice: “No; of course she didn’t dream it.”
“And you, Jack, had her interests at heart—her best interests, poor
girl, and didn’t tell her?”
Her hands went out to him in mute appeal.
“Please, Pierre—don’t!”
“Is something troubling you, Jack?”
“You are breaking my heart.”
“Why, by no means! Let’s sit here calmly and chat about the girl with
the yellow hair. To begin with—she’s rather pleasant to look at,
don’t you think?”
“I suppose she is.”
“Hm! Rather poor taste not to be sure of it. Well, let it go. You’ve
always had rather queer taste in women, Jack; but, of course, being a
long-rider, you haven’t seen much of them. At least her name is
delightful—Mary Brown! You’ve no idea how often I’ve repeated it
aloud to myself—Mary Brown!”
“I hate her!”
“You two didn’t have a very agreeable time of it? By the way, she must
have left in rather a hurry to forget her glove, eh?”
“Yes, she ran—like a coward.”
“Ah?” “Like a trembling coward. How can you care for a white-faced
little fool like that? Is she your match? Is she your mate?”
He considered a moment, as though to make sure that he did not
exaggerate.
“I love her, Jack, as men love water when they’ve ridden all day over
hot sand without a drop on their lips—you know when the tongue gets
thick and the mouth fills with cotton—and then you see clear, bright
water, and taste it?
“She is like that to me. She feeds every sense; and when I look in her
eyes, Jack, I feel like the starved man on the desert, as I was
saying, drinking that priceless water. You knew something of the way I
feel, Jack. Isn’t it a little odd that you didn’t keep her here?”
She had stood literally shuddering during this speech, and now she
burst out, far beyond all control: “Because she loathes you; because
she hates herself for ever having loved you; because she despises
herself for having ridden up here after you. Does that fill your cup
of water, Pierre, eh?”
His forehead was shining with sweat, but he set his teeth, and, after
a moment, he was able to say in the same hard, calm voice: “I suppose
there was no real reason for her change. She can be persuaded back to
me in a moment. In that case just tell me where she has gone and I’ll
ride after her.”
He made as if to rise, but she cried in a panic, and yet with a wild
exultation: “No, she’s done with you forever, and the more you make
love to her now the more she’ll hate you. Because she knows that when
you kissed her before—when you kissed her—you were living with
a woman.”
“I—living with a woman?”
Her voice had risen out of the whisper for the outbreak. Now it sank
back into it.
“Yes—with me!” “With you? I see. Naturally it must have gone hard
with her—Mary! And she wouldn’t see reason even when you explained
that you and I are like brothers?”
He leaned a little toward her and just a shade of emotion came in his
voice.
“When you carefully explained, Jack, with all the eloquence you could
command, that you and I have ridden and fought and camped together
like brothers for six years? And how I gave you your first gun? And
how I’ve stayed between you and danger a thousand times? And how I’ve
never treated you otherwise than as a man? And how I’ve given you the
love of a blood-brother to take the place of the brother who died? And
how I’ve kept you in a clean and pure respect such as a man can only
give once in his life—and then only to his dearest friend? She
wouldn’t listen—even when you talked to her like this?”
“For God’s sake—Pierre!”
“Ah, but you talked well enough to pave the way for me. You talked so
eloquently that with a little more persuasion from me she will know
and understand. Come, I must be gone after her. Which way did she
ride—up or down the valley?”
“You could talk to her forever and she’d never listen. Pierre, I told
her that I was—your woman—that you’d told me of your scenes with
her—and that we’d laughed at them together.”
She covered her eyes and crouched, waiting for the wrath that would
fall on her, but he only smiled bitterly on the bowed head, saying:
“Why have I waited so long to hear you say what I knew already? I
suppose because I wouldn’t believe until I heard the whole abominable
truth from your own lips. Jack, why did you do it?”
“Won’t you see? Because I’ve loved you always, Pierre!”
“Love—you—your tiger-heart? No, but you were like a cruel, selfish
child. You were jealous because you didn’t want the toy taken away. I
knew it. I knew that even if I rode after her it would be hopeless.
Oh, God, how terribly you’ve hurt me, partner!”
It wrung a little moan from her. He said after a moment: “It’s only
the ghost of a chance, but I’ll have to take it. Tell me which way she
rode? No? Then I’ll try to find her.”
She leaped between him and the door, flinging her shoulders against it
with a crash and standing with outspread arms to bar the way.
“You must not go!”
He turned his head somewhat.
“Don’t stand in front of me, Jack. You know I’ll do what I say, and
just now it’s a bit hard for me to face you.”
“Pierre, I feel as if there were a hand squeezing my heart small, and
small, and small. Pierre, I’d die for you!”
“I know you would. I know you would, partner. It was only a mistake,
and you acted the way any coldhearted boy would act if—if someone
were to try to steal his horse, for instance. But just now it’s hard
for me to look at you and be calm.”
“Don’t try to be! Swear at me—curse—rave—beat me; I’d be glad of
the blows, Pierre. I’d hold out my arms to ‘em. But don’t go out
that door!”
“Why?”
“Because—if you found her—she’s not alone.”
“Say that slowly. I don’t understand. She’s not alone?”
“I’ll try to tell you from the first. She started out for you with
Dick Wilbur for a guide.”
“Good old Dick, God bless him! I’ll fill all his pockets with gold for
that; and he loves her, you know.”
“You’ll never see Dick Wilbur again. On the first night they camped
she missed him when he went for water. She went down after a while and
saw the mark of his body on the sand. He never appeared again.”
“Who was it?”
“Listen. The next morning she woke up and found that someone had
taken care of the fire while she slept, and her pack was lashed on one
of the saddles. She rode on that day and came at night to a campfire
with a bed of boughs near it and no one in sight. She took that camp
for herself and no one showed up.
“Don’t you see? Someone was following her up the valley and taking
care of the poor baby on the way. Someone who was afraid to let
himself be seen. Perhaps it was the man who killed Dick Wilbur without
a sound there beside the river; perhaps as Dick died he told the man
who killed him about the lonely girl and this other man was white
enough to help Mary.
“But all Mary ever saw of him was that second night when she thought
she saw a streak of white, traveling like a galloping horse, that
disappeared over a hill and into the trees—”
“A streak of white—”
“Yes, yes! The white horse—McGurk!”
“McGurk!” repeated Pierre stupidly; then: “And you knew she would be
going out to him when she left this house?”
“I knew—Pierre—don’t look at me like that—I knew that it would be
murder to let you cross with McGurk. You’re the last of seven—he’s a
devil—no man—”
“And you let her go out into the night—to him.”
She clung to a last thread of hope: “If you met him and killed him
with the luck of the cross it would bring equal bad luck on someone
you love—on the girl, Pierre!”
He was merely repeating stupidly: “You let her go out—to him—in the
night! She’s in his arms now—you devil—you tiger—”
She threw herself down and clung about his knees with hysterical
strength.
He tore the little cross from his neck and flung it into her upturned
face.
“Don’t make me put my hands on you, Jack. Let me go!” There was no
need to tear her grasp away. She crumpled and slipped sidewise to the
floor. He leaned over and shook her violently by the shoulder.
“Which way did she ride? Which way did they ride?”
She whispered: “Down the valley, Pierre; down the valley; I swear they
rode that way.”
And as she lay in a half swoon she heard the faint clatter of
galloping hoofs over the rocks and a wild voice yelling, fainter and
fainter with distance: “McGurk!”
It came back to her like a threat; it beat at her ears and roused her,
that continually diminishing cry: “McGurk!” It went down the valley,
and Mary
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