The Adventures of Gil Blas of Santillane by Alain René le Sage (good books to read in english .TXT) 📕

preferred legal measures to a reliance on our honour; but we

shall take the first opportunity of obtaining a replevy, and will

pay you without looking at your bill. To have my master on your

books is like so many ingots of gold. The landlord brought us the

wine, in spite of unmannerly creditors; and we drank to a speedy

replevy. It was as good as a comedy to see us drinking each

other’s health every minute, under our masters’ titles. Don

Antonio’s servant called Don Ferdinand’s plain Gamboa, and Don

Ferdinand’s servant called Don Antonio’s Centell�s: they dubbed

me Silva; and we kept pace in drunkenness, under these borrowed

names, with the noblemen to whom they properly belonged.

Though my wit was less conspicuous than that of the other guests,

they lost no opportunity of testifying their pleasure in my

acquaintance. Silva, said one of our merriest soakers, we shall

make something of you, my friend. I perceive that you have wit at

will, if you did but know how to draw upon it. The fear of

talking absurdly prevents you from throwing out at all; and yet

it is only by a bold push that a thousand people now-a-days set

themselves up for good companions. Do you wish to be bright? You

have only to give the reins to your loquacity, and to venture

indiscriminately on whatever comes uppermost: your blunders will

pass for the eccentricities of genius. Though you should utter an

hundred extravagances, let but a single good joke be packed up in

the bundle, the nonsense shall be all forgotten, the witticism

bandied about, and your talent be puffed into high repute. This

is the happy method our masters have devised, and it ought to be

adopted by all new candidates. Besides that I had but too strong

a wish to pass for a clever fellow, the trick they taught me

appeared so easy in the performance, that it ought not to be

buried in obscurity. I tried it at once, and the fumes of the

wine contributed to my success; that is to say, I talked at

random, and had the good luck to strike out of much absurdity

some flashes of merriment, very acceptable to my audience. This

first essay inspired me with confidence. I redoubled my

sprightliness, to sparkle in repartee; and chance gave a

successful issue to my endeavours.

Well done! said my fellow-servant who had addressed me in the

street, do not you begin to shake off your rustic manners? You

have not been two hours in our company, and you are quite another

creature: your improvement will be visible every day. This it is

to wait on people of quality. It causes an elevation, which the

mind can never attain under a plebeian roof. Doubtless, answered

I — and for that reason I shall henceforth dedicate my little

talents to the nobility. That is bravely said, roared out Don

Ferdinand’s servant, half seas over, commoners are not entitled

to possess such a fund of superior genius as exists in us. Come,

gentlemen, let us make a vow never to colleague with any such

beggarly fellows; let us swear to that by Styx. We laughed

heartily at Gaspard’s conceit: the proposal was received with

applause: and we took this mock oath with our glasses in our

hands.

Thus sat we at table till our masters were pleased to get up from

it. This was at midnight; an outrageous instance of sobriety, in

the opinion of my colleagues. To be sure, these noble lords left

the tavern so early only to visit a celebrated wanton, lodging in

the purlieus of the court, and keeping open house night and day

for the votaries of pleasure. She was a woman from five and

thirty to forty, still in the height of her charms, entertaining

in her discourse, and so perfect a mistress in the art of

pleasure, that she sold the waste and refuse of her beauty at a

higher price than the first sample of the unadulterated article.

She had always two or three other pieces of damaged goods in the

house, who contributed not a little to the great concourse of

nobility resorting thither. The afternoon was spent in play; then

supper, and the night passed in drinking and making merry. Our

masters staid till morning, and so did we, without thinking the

time long; for, while they were toying with the mistresses, we

attacked the maids. At length, we all parted when daylight peeped

in on our festivities, and went to bed each of us at our separate

homes.

My master getting up at his usual time, about noon, dressed

himself. He went out. I followed him, and we paid a visit to Don

Antonio Centell�s, with whom we found one Don Alvaro de Acuna. He

was an old gentleman, who gave lectures on the science of

debauchery. The rising generation, if they wanted to qualify

themselves for fine gentlemen, put themselves under his tuition.

He moulded their ductile habits to pleasure, taught them to make

a distinguished figure in the world, and to squander their

substance: he had no qualms as to running out his own, for the

deed was done. After these three blades had exchanged the

compliments of the morning, Centell�s said to my master — In

good faith, Don Matthias, you could not have come at a more lucky

time. Don Alvar is come to take me with him to a dinner, given by

a citizen to the Marquis de Zenette and Don Juan de Moncade; and

you shall be of the party. And what is the citizen’s name? said

Don Matthias. Gregorio de Noriega, said Don Alvar, and I will

describe the young man in two words. His father, a rich jeweller,

is gone abroad, to attend the foreign markets, and left his son,

at his departure, in the enjoyment of a large income. Gregorio is

a blockhead, with a turn for every sort of extravagance, and an

awkward hankering after the reputation of wit and fashion, in

despite of nature. He has begged of me to give him a few

instructions. I manage him completely; and can assure you,

gentlemen, that I lead him a rare dance. His estate is rather

deeply dipped already. I do not doubt it, exclaimed Centell�s; I

see the vulgar dog in an almshouse. Come, Don Matthias: let us

honour the fellow with our acquaintance, and be in at the death

of him. Willingly, answered my master, for I delight in seeing

the fortune of these plebeian upstarts kicked over, when they

affect to mix among us. Nothing, for instance, ever entertained

me so much as the downfall of the toll-gatherer’s son, whom play,

and the vanity of figuring among the great, have stripped, till

he has not a house over his head. Oh! as for that, replied Don

Alvar, he deserves no pity, he is as great a coxcomb in his

poverty as he was in his prosperity.

Centell�s and my master accompanied Don Alvar to Gregorio de

Noriega’s party. We went there also, that is, Mogicon and myself;

both in ecstasy at having an opportunity of spunging on a

citizen, and pleasing ourselves with the thought of being in at

the death of him. At our entrance, we observed several men

employed in preparing dinner; and there issued from the ragouts

they were taking up, a vapour which conciliated the palate

through the medium of the nostrils. The Marquis de Zenette and

Don Juan de Moncade were just come. The founder of the feast

seemed a great simpleton. He aped the man of fashion with a most

clumsy grace; a wretched copy of admirable originals, or, more

properly, an idiot in the chair of wisdom and taste. Figure to

yourself a man of this character in the centre of five bantering

fellows, all intent on making a jest of him, and drawing him into

ridiculous expenses. Gentlemen, said Don Alvar, after the first

interchange of civilities, give me leave to introduce you to

Signor Gregorio de Noriega, a most brilliant star in the

hemisphere of fashion. He owns a thousand amiable qualities. Do

you know that he has an highly cultivated understanding? Choose

your own subject, he is equally at home in every branch, from the

subtilty and closeness of logic, to the elementary science of the

criss-cross-row. Oh! this is really too flattering, interrupted

the scot and lot gentleman with a very uncouth laugh. I might,

Signor Alvaro, put you to the blush as you have put me; for you

may truly be termed a reservoir as it were, a common sewer of

erudition. I had no intention, replied Don Alvaro, to draw upon

myself so savoury an encomium; but truly, gentlemen, Signor

Gregorio cannot fail of establishing a name in the world. As for

me, said Don Antonio, what is so delightful in my eyes, far above

the honours of logic or the criss-cross row, is the tasteful

selection of his company. Instead of demeaning himself to the

level of tradesmen, he associates only with the young nobility,

and sets the expense at nought. There is an elevation of

sentiment in this conduct which enchants me: and this is what you

may truly call disbursing with taste and judgment.

These ironical speeches were only the preludes to a continual

strain of banter. Poor Gregorio was attacked on all hands. The

wits shot their bolts by turns, but they made no impression on

the fool; on the contrary, he took all they said literally, and

seemed highly pleased with his guests, as if they did him a

favour by making him their laughing-stock. In short, he served

them for a butt while they sat at table, which they did not quit

during the afternoon, nor till late at night. We, as well as our

masters, drank as we liked, so that the servants’-hall and the

dining-room were in equally high order when we took our leave of

the young jeweller.

CH. V. — Gil Blas becomes the darling of the fair sex, and

makes an interesting acquaintance.

AFTER some hours’ sleep I got up in fine spirits; and calling the

advice of Melendez to mind, went, till my master was stirring, to

pay my court to our steward, whose vanity was rather flattered by

this attention. He received me with a gracious air, and inquired

how I was reconciled to the habits and manners of the young

nobility. I answered, that they were strange to me as yet, but

that use and good example might work wonders in the end.

Use and good example did work wonders, and that right soon. My

temper and conduct were quite altered. From a discreet, sober

lad, I got to be a lively, heedless merry-andrew. Don Antonio’s

servant paid me a compliment on my transformation, and told me

that there wanted nothing but a tender interest in the lovely

part of the creation to shine like a new star dropped from the

heavens. He pointed out to me that it was an indispensable

requisite in the character of a pretty fellow, that all our set

were well with some fine woman or other; and that he himself; to

his own share, engrossed the favours of two beauties in high

life. I was of opinion that the rascal lied. Master Mogicon, said

I, you are doubtless a very dapper, lively little fellow, with a

modest assurance; but still I do not comprehend how women of

quality, not having your sweet person on their own private

establishments, should run the risk of being detected in an

intrigue with a footman out of doors. Oh! as for that, answered

he, they do not know my condition. To my master’s wardrobe, and

even to his name, am I indebted for these conquests. I will tell

you how it is. I dress myself up