The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, vol 14 by Sir Richard Francis Burton (the best books to read TXT) 📕

Presently on a day of the days he inclined to the hunt and the chase, so he went off with his suite till they found themselves in the middle of the wildest of wolds where the ruler came upon an underground cavern. He proposed to enter therein, when his followers prevented him and behold, a man came to him from the desert showing the signs of wayfare and carrying a somewhat of water and victual and his garments were all threadbare. The King enquired of him saying, “Whence hast thou come and wither art thou going?” and the other replied, “We be three in this antre who have fled our country; and whenever we require aught of meat and drink, one of us fareth forth to fetch what will suffice us of provision for ten days.” “And what is the cause of your flying your native land?” asked the King, and the other answered, “Verily our tale is wondrous and our adventures are joyous and marvellous.” Hereupon quoth the King, “Wallahi, we will not quit this spot till such time as we shall have heard your histories; and let each one of you three recount to us what befell him, so that we hear it from his own mouth.” Hereupon the King commanded sundry of his suite to set forth home and the rest to abide beside him; and he sent a Chamberlain of the Chamberlains that he might go bring from the city somewhat of victual and water and wax candles and all the case required, saying the while to himself, “Verily the hearing of histories is better than hunting and birding, for haply they may solace and gladden the hearts of men.”[FN#323] So the Chamberlain went forth and, after an absence of an hour or so he returned bringing all the King had commanded; upon which he and the suite brought in the Larrikin[FN#324]

together with his two companions until they led them to the presence and seated the three together. All this while none of the vagabonds knew that the personage before them was King of the city. So they fell to conversing until the next night came on when the Sovran bade them tell their tales of themselves and what had befallen each and every of them. They replied, “Hearkening and obedience;” and the foremost of them began to recite the

History of the First Larrikin.

Verily, O King, my tale is a rare and it is e’en as follows:—I had a mother of whose flocks the World had left her but a single kid, and we owned ne’er another. Presently we determined to sell it; and, having so done, we bought it with its price a young calf, which we brought up for a whole year till it grew fat and full-sized. Then my mother said to me, “Take yon calf and go sell it;” so I went forth with it to the Bazar, and I saw that not one was like it, when behold, a body of vagabonds,[FN#325] who numbered some forty, looked at the beast, and it pleased them; so they said one to other, “Let us carry this away and cut its throat and flay it.” Then one of them, as all were standing afar off, came near me and said, “O youth, wilt thou sell this kid?”

and quoth I, “O my uncle, verily this is a calf and not a kid;”

and the other rejoined, “Art thou blind? This is a kid.” Cried I, “A calf!” So he asked, “Wilt thou take from me a dollar?”[FN#326]

and I answered, “Nay, O my uncle!” Thereupon he went away from me, and another came after him and said, “O youth, wilt thou sell this kid?” and said I, “This is a calf,” and quoth he “This is a kid,” and reviled me the while I held my peace. Again quoth he, “Wilt thou take for this a dollar?” but I was not satisfied therewith, and they ceased not to wrangle with me, one after other, each coming up and saying, “O youth, wilt thou sell this kid?” At last their Shaykh[FN#327] accosted me and cried, “Wilt thou sell it?” and I rejoined, “There is no Majesty save in Allah! I will sell it on one condition, to wit, that I take from thee its tail.” Replied to me[FN#328] the Shaykh of the Vagabonds, “Thou shalt take the tail when we have slaughtered it;” then, paying me a dollar, he led off the beast, and returned to his own folk. Presently they killed it and flayed it, when I took the tail and hastened back to my mother. She said to me, “Hast thou sold the calf?” and said I, “Yes, I have sold it, and have taken a dollar and the calf’s tail.” “And what wilt thou do for the tail?” asked she; and I answered, “I will do him brown[FN#329] who took it from me saying, This is a kid, and I will serve him a sleight which shall get out of him to its price ten times one hundred.”[FN#330] With these words I arose and, taking the tail, I flayed it and studded it with nails and bits of glass, and I asked of my mother a maiden’s dress, which she brought me; and presently I covered my face with a Burka’-veil[FN#331] and I adorned me and perfumed myself and I girded my loins underneath my clothes with the tail of that calf.

Then went I forth like a virgin girl till I reached the barrack of those blackguards, when I found that they had cooked the whole calf and naught of it remained undressed, and they had prepared to spread the table and were about sitting downt o supper. Then I went[FN#332] in to them and said, “The Peace be upon you,” and they rose to me in a body of their joy, and returned my greetings and said, “By Allah, our night is a white one.” So I entered to them and supped with them, and they all inclined to me, and their mustachios wagged in token that they would disport with me. But when darkness came on they said, “This night is for our Shaykh, but after this each one of us shall take her for his own night.”—And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day, and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I should relate to you on the coming night an the King suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

The Four Hundred and Forty-first Night, Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the vagabonds said, “Each one of us shall take her to him for a night after the Shaykh, “and so saying they left me and went their ways. Then the Chief fell to chatting with me and he was in high spirits, when suddenly my glance fell upon a rope hanging from the ceiling of that barrack and I cried, “O Shaykh!” whereto he replied, “Yes, O my lady and light of mine eyes.” Said I to him, “What may be this cord thus suspended?” and said he, “This is called ‘hanging-gear’; and, when any of ours requireth chastisement from my associates, we hoist him up by this rope and we bash him.” Quoth I, “Hang me up and let me see how ‘tis done,”

but quoth he, “Heaven forfend, O my lady! I will hang myself in thy stead and thou shalt look upon me.” Hereat he arose and tied himself tight and cried, “Haul up this rope and make it fast in such a place!” I did his bidding and bound it right firmly and left him hanging in the air. Presently he cried, “Let go the cord,” and replied I, “O Shaykh, first let me enoy the spectacle.” Then I stripped him of all his clothing and drawing forth the calf’s tail which was studded with nails and glass splinters, I said to him, “O Shaykh, is this the tail of a kid or of a calf?” “What woman art thou?” asked he, and I answered, “I am the owner of the calf;” and then, tucking up my two sleeves to the elbows, I beat him till I stripped him of his skin and he lost his senses and he had no breath wherewith to speak.

Thereupon I arose and fell to searching the hall, where I found sundry valuables amongst which was a box, so I opened it and came upon three hundred gold pieces and a store of reals[FN#333] and silverlings and jadids.[FN#334] I laid hands on the whole of it and bore off somewhat of the most sumptuous dresses; and, having wrapped them all up in a sheet, I carried them away; and about dawn I went in to my mother and cried, “Take thee to the price of the calf, which I have received from the purchaser.” But when the day was high and the sun waxed hot the whole troop of the Shaykh collected and said, “Verily our Elder hath slept till the undurn hour;” and one of them declared, “‘Tis from enjoying so much pleasure and luxury, he and the girl; and doubtless their night hath been a white[FN#335] night.” So they ceased not talking together and each of them had his word until the noon was high, when certain of them said, “Come with us and let us rouse him from sleep:” and, saying thus, all went to the door of the hall and opened it. Hereupon they found their Shaykh hanging up and his body bleeding profusely;[FN#336] so they asked him, “What hath befallen thee?” and he answered in a weak voice, “Verily that girl is no girl at all, but she is the youth who owned the calf.” They replied, “By Allah, there is no help but that we seize him and slay him;” whereto the Edler said, “Loose me and lead me to the Hammam that I may wash clean my skin of all this blood.” Then they let him down and after mounting him upon a donkey they bore him to the baths. Hereat I went to the slaughterhouse and and covered my body with bullocks’ blood and stuck to it pledgets of cotton so that I became like one sorely diseased and I repaired to the same Hammam propped upon a staff and required admittance. They refused me saying, “The Shaykh of the Vagabonds is now in the baths nor may anyone go in to him.”

Quoth I to them, “I am a man with a malady,” whereto quoth one of them, “This is a poor wight, so let him come within.” Accordingly I entered and found the Chief alone, whereupon I drew forth the tail and asked him, “O Shaykh, is this the tail of a calf or a kid?” “Who art thou?” said he, and I said, “I am the owner of the calf;” after which I fell to beating him with the tail until his breath was