Outcast by Abigail Livinghouse (self help books to read TXT) 📕

“So you want to see my wings?” I asked. With a silent nod, she sat and waited.

With another breath, I released the pressure in my back, by releasing my ten feet long, jet black wings.

Rafaela

I gasped at the sight of Gabriel’s shining wings. They were glorious. Each wing extended so long that the tip of the left wing nearly touched my cheek, and black feathers adorned them. They were so beautiful. They seemed to have a faint glow, glimmering darkly in the shade of the clouded morning. I swallowed, staring bug eyed at his wings. I realized then that I was just staring at him, and I fumbled for words.

“The–they’re . . .” I swallowed again. Gabriel’s eyes were dark as he watched me struggle to find a way to describe his beauty.

“They’re disgusting.” He muttered, bunching his shoulders as his wings drew back.

My eyes widened and I got to my feet, surprised at his sudden shift in mood. Did he honestly think his wings were disgusting?

“What?” I finally managed to choke out. “What the hell are you talking about? They’re so–beautiful.” I murmured, my eyes glued to him in awe. He looked at me oddly, his eyes misbelieving.

“Don’t bullshit me, Rafaela. They’re absolutely horrid.” He said, his lip curling with dark conviction.

My brow scrunched in confusion and anger. Was he nuts?

“Are you fucking insane? Your wings are amazing.” My voice rose with frustration as I spoke, and I began to move closer to him. He flinched away from me, but I ignored him.

“Gabriel, you cannot honestly tell me that you think your wings are ugly?” I spoke sternly, but as he looked at me, his expression cold and drawn, I realized that he really did find his wings disgusting.

“Oh my god”, I said, my tone hot, “You are nuts.” I huffed and before I reconsidered what I was about to do, I reached forward and gingerly touched his left wing.

The feathers were so soft and smooth under my hand. As I ran my fingers over the black velvety feathers, my heart began picking up speed and pounding inside my chest. Gabriel had remained silent throughout my whole rant, and as I looked up at him I saw that his eyes had widened in surprise at my touch.

“They are beautiful.” I said truthfully again.

Gabriel

Rafaela stared at me, with her big chestnut eyes, as her hands traveled down my wing, caressing my feathers. I felt a shiver go through me at her touch. She was so warm, so soft, and so gentle.

A warm sensation stirred in my chest, and I watched silently as Rafaela reached out and touched my right wing with her hand, then use both hands to smooth down my feathers. I was shocked and confused, to say the least. At the sight of my wings Rafaela hadn’t been repulsed, like I had expected, but she had seemed to like them. How could she? They were hideous. Fallen angel wings were nothing to be proud of. My wings should not be black as night, they should be white and pure, just like before I had fallen victim to the allure of mortals and cast out.

Yes, I had deceived my Lord and broken my promises. I had preyed on an innocent mortal girl, we had touched, we had become close, and surely, He had found out. He knows everything, for He is everything. When I was banished I wasn’t surprised. However I was very angry and frustrated with myself. I had given up everything and for what? A taste of mortal desire? The luxury of satisfaction is something that I can no longer afford, because I had tasted the forbidden fruit, and while sweet, was not worth my position.

Aria had been right all along, I was lucky to be granted the position of guardian angel. Hell, I could’ve done a lot worse. I could’ve been stripped of my wings and become a mortal altogether. It’s what I deserved, but it’s not what I received. I could’ve been sent straight to Hell, just like my parents when they defied Him, but instead, I was lucky enough to make out with black wings and a bruised ego.

Even though I put up with Nick every night, Nick and his obnoxious babbling, his raucous music, and his bringing a girl home nearly every night and hearing everything they’re doing through the paper thin walls of the apartment, I’m still lucky. And through all this, all the way back to before I was sent away, Zale had been watching quietly from the sidelines, waiting for me to screw up. I had seen him, and I’m sure he had seen me, and now he had what he wanted. If there was anything Zale was it was greedy, and competitive. He loved to be at the top, to be the winner. He always claimed the ultimate prize . . . Suddenly it hit me.

With Rafaela gently stroking my wings as I realized my mistakes, I also realized with a jolt Zale’s motives, his obsession. He had always told me about his fantasies of ruling with lovely Speaker’s surrounding him, so that whenever he’d wish to talk he wouldn’t have to verbally tell his secrets and desires, he would merely have to gaze into one of his subject’s eyes, and with one touch, he’d be able to control them completely. Zale was a powerful being, rueful, and cruel.

Sometimes, he would point out women, in the Heavens, and down in Earth, women he coveted. His subjects, he stated, would strictly be female, so that he could enjoy his time of ruling with a pleasant view. Zale was a Soul Speaker, and had always wished for other Speaker’s to be around. He searched for decades, just like he said he had, and he hadn’t been able to find any Speaker’s he fancied. Until now. 

He grinned, his lip curling ruefully as he gazed down at the fallen angel realizing that his doubts and suspicions were completely necessary, and completely true. It had taken him long enough to figure out my plan, he thought with a cold laugh. Finding Speakers was a tricky, and time consuming task, but now, his search was nearly complete. He could settle for one, one was enough for now. His gaze shifted to the girl who was staring alarmed at the angel she had been fondly caressing.

Now, Gabriel was in a tear, telling his little assignment what was really going on. Why she had been feeling watched the past few days, why she had been feeling uncomfortable. Oh, Gabriel knew he was more skilled than that, skilled enough that he wouldn’t have been spotted. Zale was more skilled, in many arts, however he had let his defenses down with this one. A small mistake, but a fixable one. He would fix it, in due time. But first, he had to find her. Rafaela Geordie, his first task at hand.

Rafaela

I struggled to keep up with what Gabriel was saying. One moment, everything was calm, with the slow drizzle of rain around us, and the soft feel of his feathery wings under my fingers, and then something dawned on his face that turned him into a madman. He was now back to pacing and babbling about some guy named Zale who was after me.

“Wait”, I reached out to grab his shoulder, but my fingertips only skimmed his leather jacket. “Dammit Gabriel! What the hell is going on?” I exclaimed in outrage.

He suddenly stopped his frantic pacing, spun around and faced me. His eyes were wild, his expression twisted into one of anger and resentment.

“You want to know what’s going on?” He asked, but before I could answer he continued quickly. “You want to know? Okay, here it is. You’re a Soul Speaker, and so am I. There’s an angel, one of my kind, in Heaven, looking down at us right now and he’s after you.” Gabriel said, his tone sharp and cold as steel. I scowled, trying to comprehend.

“What? But that makes no sense. Why would he want me?” I asked. Gabriel rolled his eyes, continuing to pace once more.

“Because, you’re a female Soul Speaker, and he covets them. He had to get rid of his last Speaker because she wouldn’t obey his commands. Now, he’s looking for a replacement, and he wants you.” He snapped, then shook his head vigorously.

“Damn, I can’t believe I didn’t see this before!” He yelled, suddenly whipping his arm out, clutching one of the decorative vases and throwing it across the yard where it shattered loudly against the fence. I could hear our maid shuffling through the kitchen.

“Shit, she’s gonna come out here.” I muttered. Gabriel looked distractedly at the back door, where Rita was hastily making her way towards.

“Goddamn it all!” Gabriel