Breathless by Morgan Brashear (readnow TXT) 📕

just had a lot going on." Jordan got quiet a little too quick for Brianna's liking. Brianna was good at hiding things, so she knew when someone else was.

"Talk to me." Jordan sighed. It was a long sigh that came from deep within, one that Brianna knew much about. "Jor, tell me whats going on."

"They split  up." Shakey, she looked up. "They really split up."

"Who?"

"Dad left. Last night mom packed his bag and he," Her eyes fill with tears as she took a second. "just left."

"I'm sure he didn't really leave." Brianna reached her hand out and put it around Jordan. "They'll work it out just like they always do and he'll be back before you get home from school."

Brianna smiled at her. She had one of those stunning smiles. She was gorgeous, her smile was gorgeous, but she didn't know it, and that was the most beautiful part.

"What would I do without you?" Jordan felt better just being near Brianna.

"Thats a good question." She giggled.

 Just as Brianna looked up they walked through the door and suddely everything went in slow motion. They were tall, gorgeous, and without a care in the world: everything Brianna wanted. The girls weren't like those 'mean girls' in the movies, at least not anymore. They were the type of girls who were nice to your face but wouldn't have contact with you that wasn't necessary. They are the type of girls who pretend to be your friend but as soon as your back is turned all bets are off.

"I like your shirt." Percilla smiled genuinely as she walked by. Brianna smiled back but didn't say anything.

Brianna always has had mixed feeling about Percilla and her friends. It wasn't that they were bad people or anything. They could be quite nice in public. The thing Brianna had a problem with was how high they held their noses. They were very stuck up and full of themselves. At least, thats why she told people she didn't like them.

In reality how they are now isn't why she deeply hated them. She's never told anyone the real reason before. It wasn't a time in her life that she liked to keep remembering. The past was the past and she never wanted to go back. 

When Brianna was younger she wasn't like the other girls in her class. She played with Pokemon cards and wore basketball shorts. She was one of the boys. She liked to hang out with boys more. She never went through the Barbi stage. She never wore dresses or let her hair down. She was never one of the girls, and they never let her live it down. She was bullied and picked on everyday of her Elementary years. Everyday she was called such terrible things, things that even adults wouldn't say. She would spend her days on the bus home crying, praying for nothing more than everything to disappear, for her to disappear.

No one believe her. No teacher even helped. No one cared, and so the beautiful smile on a beautiful girl disappeared along with every sense of security. No one was ever nice to her and she never caught a break. Only one person stuck with her through it all, and that was Jordan. She stuck by her side. She was there to hold her hand through the tears and tell her that they were wrong. She was the only person who stayed with her. She was the only person sending her a light through a gloomy tunnel.

There was nothing wrong with her. She was a smart, beautiful little girl but they took that from her. They fed her lies for years and years. They told her she would never be good enough. They told her she was ugly and that she dressed like a dike. At her age she didn't even know what that was.

Now people ask her why she has no self-esteem, why she thinks so poorly of herself, but how could she explain it to them? Who would believe her? No one did then.

 

 

 

 

Fighting

Brianna slowly walked into her house, Jordan following close behind. Jordan threw her bag on the couch as she entered the house, a daily routine.

"Mom?" She quietly called.

"What?" Came an answer from the kitchen. Brianna walked into the kitchen and set her books on the counter. "Oh, Hi, Jordan."

"Hello, Lorane." Jordan smiled. Her dark brown hair laid perfectly on her shoulders.

"Mom," Brianna began.

"Yes."

"Jordan and I were planning on going to a small party down by the lake later."

"Oh, really?" Lorane grabbed a cloth from the sink and began wiping down the marble table.

"Is that okay?"Brianna asked. "Can I go?"

"Where is it?"

"By the lake." Brianna repeated.

"Who will be there?"

"A bunch of people." Jordan cut in.

"I want names." Lorane said coldly.

"I can't give you names of everyone!" Brianna began to get annoyed very fast.

"Thats it, you're not going."

"What!" Brianna shouted. "You never let me any where! This isn't fair!"

"Life isn't fair."

"Thats bullshit!" She shouted.

Jordan, surprised of Brianna's mouth, took a step back from the confrontation.

"Excuse me? Who do you think you are, talking to me like that?" Lorane threw her cloth and took a strong stance in front of Brianna.

"I never do anything wrong! I never drink without permission or sneak out! I'm a straight A student, mom! I never go anywhere except for work and school. All I'm asking for is one day!." Brianna begged with everything she had.

"If I go with you."

"Are you kidding me?"

This was a constant struggle with her mother. Brianna was everything she said, and more. She never gave Lorane any reason not to trust her but Lorane feared that she would make the same mistakes she made too much to even give Bri the chance. Lorane had always treated her like this, but still she found nothing wrong with it. Her parents were oblivious when she was a teenager, which is why she got into so much trouble. She vowed that she would never let any of her children make the same mistakes.

What Lorane didn't understand was that Brianna wasn't her. Brianna wasn't going to get pregnant, sleep around or drop out of school. Brianna had a strong head on her shoulders and wouldn't mess her future up for anything. Still, Lorane would never let her live. Locking someone up for that long and having such a tight grip on them isn't going to end well in the long run. It never does.

"Please," Brianna begged.

"Brianne Skie," Lorane warned her.

"Why not?" She screamed. "Give me one God damn reason!"

Lorane couldn't believe her audacity. Out of all her children, Brianna was the good one. She was the one who did what she was asked. She expected this from any of them except Brianne. She wanted her to have fun. She trusted her, but at the same time she didn't.

"Because I said so." Lorane said calmy.

"That is a bullshit reason! This is ridiculous! I'm so done with this shit!" Jordan backed into the corner and stood awkwardly, but entertained.

"Watch your mouth!" Lorane aalmost lost it.

"No." She said quietly. "I am not you."

"I'm aware."

"I am not going to make the same mistakes as you. You need to give me a chance to breath. You need to let me have a little freedom."

"You do."

"How? What do I do? Where do I go besides work and school?" Brianna didn't like raising her voice but it seemed like the only way to get her point across. She was beyond tired of being forced to act like an adult, but never being treating like one. She wasn't trusted. She was never allowed to go anywhere. She wasn't a child and was capable of taking care of herself, like she did almost all of the time.

"Go to your room." Brianna was tired of arguing, so she did. Jordan followed swiftly behind, never looking up.

 Brianna stood at her door and waited until Jordan was in. After Jordan took a seat on her bed Brianna grabbed the door with a good grip and slammed it. The walls rattled and one of her pictures fell and the glass shattered.

"Damn!" Brianna slammed her hand against the wall, completely fed up.

"I'll clean it up." Jordan went to stand up.

"No, I'll get it." Brianna sighed. Jordan walked over and picked up the picture while Bri took a breather.

Jordan wiped the glass off into the trash and held the picture up for Brianne to see.

"Throw it away, please." Brianna closed her eyes.

It was the only family picture they owned. It was after a long day at church. She was only five, holding on the pants of her father. Her father was holding Benjamin who was only three in the picture. Her mother stood right beside him. It was an awful picture when you really looked at it. They were obviously not happy, but it was the only one Brianna had.

"Are you sure?" Jordan asked still holding the photo in her hands. "Your fathers in it."

"I don't care." Brianna's voice cracked. She swallowed. "Just toss it."

"But, Bri,"

"Please," She begged. Jordan threw it into the garbage beside her bed. "I'm going to grab my phone I left in the hallway." Brianna smiled.

"Okay." Jordan didn't believe her for a second.

Brianna walked into the hallway and into the bathroom. She locked the door behind her and leaned against it. Her knees were so weak. She slid right down and sat at the bottom of the door. She felt the tears coming on. She felt the frustration just bubbling within.

She refused to cry. Not over this. Not now. She took a deep breath and rose to her feet.

She couldn't stop thinking about the photo. It was her only 'family' photo. Her family wasn't the photo taking type of family, so pictures like that were a one in a million chance to find. Her older brothers were never in any pictures either.

Caleb and Callin were just years apart and in their twenties. They were from her mothers first marriage. They were old enough to fend for themselves when Brianna's mother met her father. Her older brother, Daniel, was from her fathers last marriage. He had too many for Brianna to count, but Daniel was his only child before meeting Lorane.

Brianna never had a real family picture because no one was ever around long enough to do one. Daniel lived out of state with his wife and two children, Callin has a beautiful baby boy, Caleb has his own wife and three children, and whats the point with the rest? As a family, no one ever really got along either. So, a family picture would have been a little ironic.

"Bri?" A soft voice came from behind the door.

Jordan was around Brianna's house a lot. She practically lived there most weeks. She knew how over bearing her mother was. She understood how taxing being locked in that house all the time was to Bri. Brianne was the perfect girl. She literally wouldn't go anywhere without permission, knowing that every time she asked she wouldn't be allowed to go. But thats how she was.

"Mhm?" Brianna wiped her cheeks and stood in front of the mirror.

"You okay?" Jordan asked.

"Yeah, I'll be out in a sec." But Jordan didn't move. Brianna needed someone, even if she didn't want anywone.

 Brianna opened the door and stood with a smile.

"She loves you, you know." She said quietly.

"I'm sure she