My Mother's Rival by Charlotte Mary Brame (highly illogical behavior .TXT) π
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- Author: Charlotte Mary Brame
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independence; to me kind and loving. Looking at her critically, it was almost impossible to find a finer woman--her head was beautifully shaped, her hair raven black and smooth as satin, little ears like pretty pink shells, a beautiful face with dark, dreamy eyes, thick dark lashes, straight, dark brows, and a mouth that was, perhaps, the loveliest feature in her face. It was not tragical beauty, either, but comfortable and comfort loving; there was a beautiful dimple in her white chin--a wicked dimple, suggestive of fun and laughter; another, and even more beautiful dimple, deepened near her lips, and laughed when she laughed. There was nothing of tragedy about her.
Very soon she was leading the conversation, telling us the details of her journey, but all in so humorous a fashion that it was quite irresistible. Sir Roland laughed as I had never seen him laugh before, and my mother was much amused. Any one looking on at the time would never have thought this was a governess undergoing a scrutiny, but rather a duchess trying to entertain her friends.
After some few minutes I saw my mother's sweet face grow pale, and I knew that she felt tired.
"Papa," I cried, forgetting my governess, "mamma is tired; look at her face."
Miss Reinhart rose at once and seemed to float to the sofa. "I am afraid," she said, "that I deserve rebuke. I was so anxious to cheer you that I fear I have tired you. Shall I take Miss Laura with me, or would you like to have her a little longer?"
My mother grasped my hand. "You are very kind," she said to Miss Reinhart, "but I am weak and nervous; so little tires me."
"Yes, it is very sad," she answered, in cold, sweet tones.
I hated her voice, I hated her sweetness, I hated her. Child as I was, a tempest of scorn and grief and bitter rebellion raged within me. Why should she stand there in what seemed to me the insolent pride of her beauty, while my sweet mother was never to stand again? Why should she speak in those pitying tones? My mother did not need her pity. Then my father came up, too, and said that Miss Reinhart had better delay for a few days before beginning the routine of her duties so as to get used to the place. She seemed quite willing.
"Laura," said Sir Roland, "will you take Miss Reinhart to her room?"
But I clung to my mother's hand.
"I cannot leave mamma," I said. "Please do not ask me."
He turned from me with an apology.
"Laura can never leave her mother," he said.
She answered:
"Laura is quite right."
But I caught just one glimpse of her beautiful eyes, which made me thoughtful.
She went, and my father was quite silent for some minutes afterward. Then my mother asked:
"What do you think of her, Roland?"
"Well, my darling, she is really so different to what I had expected, I can hardly form a judgment. I thought to see a crude kind of girl. Miss Reinhart is a very beautiful woman of the world, as graceful, well-bred and self-possessed as a duchess."
"She is not half so beautiful as mamma," I cried.
"No, little faithful heart; not one-half," said Sir Roland.
"I must say that she seems to me far more like a fine lady visitor than a governess," said my mother.
"You will find her all right," said Sir Roland, brightly. "She seems to understand her duties and to be quite competent for them. I fancy you will like her Beatrice, darling; after all, it will be some thing to have some one to amuse us. How well she tells a story! with what brilliancy and verve!"
"I want no more amusement than I find with you and Laura," said my mother. "You are all-sufficient to me. Still, as you say, dear, it is well to have a pleasant companion."
Then, as my mother was tired, her maid came, and Sir Roland said, "Good-night."
I remember how we both felt sad and lonely, though we could not quite tell why; and that my beautiful mother fell fast asleep, holding my hand in hers; and that they would not take me away, lest they should awake her.
"And my lady has so little sleep," they said, pityingly, "we never awake her."
I wish, my darling, that for both of us it had been the long, sweet sleep from which there is no awaking.
CHAPTER VI.
The first three days following Miss Reinhart's arrival were a holiday. My father himself showed her over the house, took her through the picture galleries, told her all the legends of the place. She walked out in the grounds and had learned to make herself quite at home. Sir Roland told her that she must do so, that her duties and responsibilities would be great. She must therefore take care of herself.
I was with them in the picture gallery, and Sir Roland never stopped to think that it would perhaps be better not to discuss such things before me.
"I hope," he said, "to interest you in the whole place. I cannot tell you how different things are when the mistress of the house is ill and helpless."
"I am sure it must be so," she said, in that sweet voice, which I felt to be false and hated.
"At any time," he said, "if you see things going wrong I should be grateful for a little management on your part."
"I will always do my very best for you, Sir Roland," she said, earnestly, and I could feel in some vague way that she was sympathizing with him and pitying him in a way that was against my mother's interests. I could hardly tell how.
"Have you a good housekeeper?" she asked, and my father answered:
"Mrs. Eastwood has been here over fifty years, I believe."
"Ah!" said Miss Reinhart, "that is too long; those very old housekeepers are faithful, and all that kind of thing, but they are seldom of much use. If everything does not go on as you wish in this unfortunate state of things, rely upon it that is what is wrong. You should pension this good Mrs. Eastwood off, and get some one young and active, with a thorough knowledge of her business."
"We will talk about it later on," he said. "I have no doubt but that you are quite right."
She looked up into his face with tender anxiety; I saw the look, and could have killed her for it.
"You know that I am devoted to your interests." she said. "I will cheerfully and gladly do everything and anything I can," she said, "to help you. You know you may command my services when and how you will."
She spoke with the air of a grandduchess offering to obtain court patronage, and my father made her a low, sweeping bow.
Who was she, that she should talk to my father of "unfortunate circumstances," and of her devotion to him? As for things going wrong, it was not true--my mother, from her sofa, ordered the household, and I knew there was nothing wrong.
When my father saw the angry, pained expression on my face, an idea seemed to occur to him. He called me to his side, and whispered to me:
"You may run away and play, darling; and mind, Laura, you must never repeat one word of what you hear to your mother; it would not do to trouble her when little things go wrong."
"Nothing has gone wrong," I answered. "Although she is ill, mamma sees to everything."
I should have said much more, but that my father placed his hand over my mouth.
"Hush! little one," he said. "I am afraid I give you too much license."
"A little wholesome discipline needed," said Miss Reinhart; "but a sweet child, Sir Roland--a sweet child, indeed!"
I could not hear what followed, but I feel quite sure that she whispered something which ended in these words:
"Too much with Lady Tayne."
I ran, fast as I could go, anywhere--where I could give vent to my childish fury. I could have stamped on her beautiful face. What right had she, a stranger, to talk about Mrs. Eastwood and mamma--to talk to papa as though he were an injured man--what right? I tried hard to keep all my indignation and anger, my fear and dread of what was to follow, to myself, but I could not bear it. I believe my heart would have broken but for Emma, my nurse. She found me behind the great cluster of laurel trees crying bitterly; and when she took me in her arms to console me, I told her all about it--told her every word. I know how she listened in dismay, for her easy, bony face grew pale, and she said nothing for some few minutes, then she cried out:
"Oh, Miss Laura, you must be good and patient; don't set yourself against her--perhaps she means no harm."
"She means harm and she will do it," I cried; "why should she speak in that tone to papa, and why does she look at him as though he were to be pitied because mamma is ill? It is mamma who wants pity; she is twenty times better lying there sick and ill than other mothers who are well and strong and go about everywhere."
"God bless the child!" cried my nurse; "why of course she is. Now, Miss Laura, you know I love you, and what I say to you is always because I do love you. Do what I say. You see she has to live here, and you had better try to make the best of it."
"She hates mamma and she hates me," I cried, unreasonably.
"Now, my dear little lady," said Emma, "how can you possibly know that? You are not reasonable or patient; try to make the best of it. It is of no use for you to make an enemy of the new lady; if you do I am sure you will suffer for it."
"Oh, Emma!" I cried, "why did she come; we were all so happy; we were all three so happy--why did she come? I did not want any education, I am sure."
"Pardon me, Miss Laura, but I think you do," said Emma, gravely.
"The only thing I want to live for at all is to be with mamma," I said--"to take care of her and try to make her happy. I do not want any other life than that."
"But," said my nurse, and I have often thought since what sense lay in her words, "do you know, Miss Laura, that my lady, who is so clever herself, will want an educated companion? For her sake you must learn all you can."
Those words gave me quite a new light. Why, of course I must; my mother was not only well educated, but she was also highly accomplished; she spoke French and German and had a very fair knowledge of Italian, whereas I had only just mastered the rudiments of English. New life, new ideas, new ambitions suddenly awoke within me, and, seeing her advantage, Emma pursued it.
"I have heard," she said, "that my lady is wonderfully clever. You will be her companion and her constant comfort; you must know some of the things she does. Now, Miss Laura, make up your mind, dear; instead of making the
Very soon she was leading the conversation, telling us the details of her journey, but all in so humorous a fashion that it was quite irresistible. Sir Roland laughed as I had never seen him laugh before, and my mother was much amused. Any one looking on at the time would never have thought this was a governess undergoing a scrutiny, but rather a duchess trying to entertain her friends.
After some few minutes I saw my mother's sweet face grow pale, and I knew that she felt tired.
"Papa," I cried, forgetting my governess, "mamma is tired; look at her face."
Miss Reinhart rose at once and seemed to float to the sofa. "I am afraid," she said, "that I deserve rebuke. I was so anxious to cheer you that I fear I have tired you. Shall I take Miss Laura with me, or would you like to have her a little longer?"
My mother grasped my hand. "You are very kind," she said to Miss Reinhart, "but I am weak and nervous; so little tires me."
"Yes, it is very sad," she answered, in cold, sweet tones.
I hated her voice, I hated her sweetness, I hated her. Child as I was, a tempest of scorn and grief and bitter rebellion raged within me. Why should she stand there in what seemed to me the insolent pride of her beauty, while my sweet mother was never to stand again? Why should she speak in those pitying tones? My mother did not need her pity. Then my father came up, too, and said that Miss Reinhart had better delay for a few days before beginning the routine of her duties so as to get used to the place. She seemed quite willing.
"Laura," said Sir Roland, "will you take Miss Reinhart to her room?"
But I clung to my mother's hand.
"I cannot leave mamma," I said. "Please do not ask me."
He turned from me with an apology.
"Laura can never leave her mother," he said.
She answered:
"Laura is quite right."
But I caught just one glimpse of her beautiful eyes, which made me thoughtful.
She went, and my father was quite silent for some minutes afterward. Then my mother asked:
"What do you think of her, Roland?"
"Well, my darling, she is really so different to what I had expected, I can hardly form a judgment. I thought to see a crude kind of girl. Miss Reinhart is a very beautiful woman of the world, as graceful, well-bred and self-possessed as a duchess."
"She is not half so beautiful as mamma," I cried.
"No, little faithful heart; not one-half," said Sir Roland.
"I must say that she seems to me far more like a fine lady visitor than a governess," said my mother.
"You will find her all right," said Sir Roland, brightly. "She seems to understand her duties and to be quite competent for them. I fancy you will like her Beatrice, darling; after all, it will be some thing to have some one to amuse us. How well she tells a story! with what brilliancy and verve!"
"I want no more amusement than I find with you and Laura," said my mother. "You are all-sufficient to me. Still, as you say, dear, it is well to have a pleasant companion."
Then, as my mother was tired, her maid came, and Sir Roland said, "Good-night."
I remember how we both felt sad and lonely, though we could not quite tell why; and that my beautiful mother fell fast asleep, holding my hand in hers; and that they would not take me away, lest they should awake her.
"And my lady has so little sleep," they said, pityingly, "we never awake her."
I wish, my darling, that for both of us it had been the long, sweet sleep from which there is no awaking.
CHAPTER VI.
The first three days following Miss Reinhart's arrival were a holiday. My father himself showed her over the house, took her through the picture galleries, told her all the legends of the place. She walked out in the grounds and had learned to make herself quite at home. Sir Roland told her that she must do so, that her duties and responsibilities would be great. She must therefore take care of herself.
I was with them in the picture gallery, and Sir Roland never stopped to think that it would perhaps be better not to discuss such things before me.
"I hope," he said, "to interest you in the whole place. I cannot tell you how different things are when the mistress of the house is ill and helpless."
"I am sure it must be so," she said, in that sweet voice, which I felt to be false and hated.
"At any time," he said, "if you see things going wrong I should be grateful for a little management on your part."
"I will always do my very best for you, Sir Roland," she said, earnestly, and I could feel in some vague way that she was sympathizing with him and pitying him in a way that was against my mother's interests. I could hardly tell how.
"Have you a good housekeeper?" she asked, and my father answered:
"Mrs. Eastwood has been here over fifty years, I believe."
"Ah!" said Miss Reinhart, "that is too long; those very old housekeepers are faithful, and all that kind of thing, but they are seldom of much use. If everything does not go on as you wish in this unfortunate state of things, rely upon it that is what is wrong. You should pension this good Mrs. Eastwood off, and get some one young and active, with a thorough knowledge of her business."
"We will talk about it later on," he said. "I have no doubt but that you are quite right."
She looked up into his face with tender anxiety; I saw the look, and could have killed her for it.
"You know that I am devoted to your interests." she said. "I will cheerfully and gladly do everything and anything I can," she said, "to help you. You know you may command my services when and how you will."
She spoke with the air of a grandduchess offering to obtain court patronage, and my father made her a low, sweeping bow.
Who was she, that she should talk to my father of "unfortunate circumstances," and of her devotion to him? As for things going wrong, it was not true--my mother, from her sofa, ordered the household, and I knew there was nothing wrong.
When my father saw the angry, pained expression on my face, an idea seemed to occur to him. He called me to his side, and whispered to me:
"You may run away and play, darling; and mind, Laura, you must never repeat one word of what you hear to your mother; it would not do to trouble her when little things go wrong."
"Nothing has gone wrong," I answered. "Although she is ill, mamma sees to everything."
I should have said much more, but that my father placed his hand over my mouth.
"Hush! little one," he said. "I am afraid I give you too much license."
"A little wholesome discipline needed," said Miss Reinhart; "but a sweet child, Sir Roland--a sweet child, indeed!"
I could not hear what followed, but I feel quite sure that she whispered something which ended in these words:
"Too much with Lady Tayne."
I ran, fast as I could go, anywhere--where I could give vent to my childish fury. I could have stamped on her beautiful face. What right had she, a stranger, to talk about Mrs. Eastwood and mamma--to talk to papa as though he were an injured man--what right? I tried hard to keep all my indignation and anger, my fear and dread of what was to follow, to myself, but I could not bear it. I believe my heart would have broken but for Emma, my nurse. She found me behind the great cluster of laurel trees crying bitterly; and when she took me in her arms to console me, I told her all about it--told her every word. I know how she listened in dismay, for her easy, bony face grew pale, and she said nothing for some few minutes, then she cried out:
"Oh, Miss Laura, you must be good and patient; don't set yourself against her--perhaps she means no harm."
"She means harm and she will do it," I cried; "why should she speak in that tone to papa, and why does she look at him as though he were to be pitied because mamma is ill? It is mamma who wants pity; she is twenty times better lying there sick and ill than other mothers who are well and strong and go about everywhere."
"God bless the child!" cried my nurse; "why of course she is. Now, Miss Laura, you know I love you, and what I say to you is always because I do love you. Do what I say. You see she has to live here, and you had better try to make the best of it."
"She hates mamma and she hates me," I cried, unreasonably.
"Now, my dear little lady," said Emma, "how can you possibly know that? You are not reasonable or patient; try to make the best of it. It is of no use for you to make an enemy of the new lady; if you do I am sure you will suffer for it."
"Oh, Emma!" I cried, "why did she come; we were all so happy; we were all three so happy--why did she come? I did not want any education, I am sure."
"Pardon me, Miss Laura, but I think you do," said Emma, gravely.
"The only thing I want to live for at all is to be with mamma," I said--"to take care of her and try to make her happy. I do not want any other life than that."
"But," said my nurse, and I have often thought since what sense lay in her words, "do you know, Miss Laura, that my lady, who is so clever herself, will want an educated companion? For her sake you must learn all you can."
Those words gave me quite a new light. Why, of course I must; my mother was not only well educated, but she was also highly accomplished; she spoke French and German and had a very fair knowledge of Italian, whereas I had only just mastered the rudiments of English. New life, new ideas, new ambitions suddenly awoke within me, and, seeing her advantage, Emma pursued it.
"I have heard," she said, "that my lady is wonderfully clever. You will be her companion and her constant comfort; you must know some of the things she does. Now, Miss Laura, make up your mind, dear; instead of making the
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