Fighting by Anaya Phoenix (black books to read txt) 📕

as she looked at what was a major struggle. Mason had put his arms over Ander’s shoulders, which was sort of difficult because they were the same height, and Shay had childishly settled around Ander’s legs. My brother had gripped one of Ander’s arms and was trying to talk some sense into him. I couldn’t hear it though, blood was rushing through my ears as my body tried its hardest to heal. I felt entirely too cold, and I could only assume it was because I was losing too much blood too fast, and the more my body tried to heal the more blood I lost. I looked to the side and saw Alissa holding Libby back from touching me, which I appreciated. Filly’s touch hurt enough as it was, I didn’t need anybody clutching me as hard as Libby would.

“Luna.” I heard my mother whisper to me, and suddenly she was above me. Her face was clear from all emotion, but I watched as she kneeled next to me with pain filled dark eyes.

“My strong little baby girl, what happened?” Her voice was so soft, a whisper touch to my ears. I smiled weakly, even though tears kept falling, and shook my head. She huffed out one puff of laughter before her warm hand came up and wiped hair from my sweaty head and stroked my teary cheek.

“You’re gonna be fine, I promise.” She said softly and one tear fell, but that’s all she allowed. I looked her directly in her eyes, for once not scared to, and shook my head before my heart squeezed painfully. My body bowed again and I opened my mouth to scream but nothing came out. With a howl Ander turned into his uber wolf, which left Shay no choice but shift into his Hyena, which was about the same height. He got in front of Ander and coughed out his laughing bark while shaking his head. Jesse shifted and stood beside Shay, his eyes determined and trying their damndest not look at me.

“Luna? Luna!” Filly screamed, but it sounded so soft. With wide eyes I looked at her, my heart still squeezed tight so I couldn’t breathe.

“You need to breathe Luna! For fuck’s sake breathe!” She screamed, tears flowing down her eyes and she lightly shook me. I couldn’t tell her that it hurt so much, but at the same time didn’t hurt at all. I was dying. I looked to my mom and with the last bit of strength I had I closed my eyes and let out a soft keening howl, a mourning howl, and let my body slump and let the air slip from my lungs.

Chapter 36

 

I sucked in as much as air as I could as I shot up, my eyes coming wide open as I blinked the brightness away. 

“You just had to go and kill yourself, didn’t you?” Lupa said agitatedly while she looked down at me. 

“Oh I’m sorry that the stress of war is too much sometimes. And I didn’t kill myself. If you’d been paying attention, I was brutally murdered. You could’ve taken me out of my misery at any point, y’know?” I said getting up and crossing my arms over my bare chest and glaring at her. We stayed glaring at each other, our scowls getting worse by the second, for a solid minute before she rolled her eyes, turned her back to me, and walked away. Rolling my own eyes so far back I was sure I’d seen the front of my brain I followed after her, wanting so badly to stomp down on her stupid dress trail. But that would be heresy and I needed her to bring my back to life before I started doing stupid things. Slowly, as we walked, the white world of Eternal seemed to blend into the muted colors of the forest I missed and the ones that dominated Lupa’s domain of Eternal. We walked into a clearing and I could hear the running water that I had gotten entirely too used to for it to be normal. She walked to the shore of the lake and hiked up her skirt before she sat down, plunging her feet and legs into the cool water. I stayed standing behind her, knowing this was her domain and if I were to directly disrespect her here there would be royal hell to pay and I was strapped on cash. With a deep sigh she spread open her arms and her dress seemed to melt off of her until she was left naked, the only thing shielding me from her completely naked body was her long black hair.  

“I don’t understand why you’ve always been so difficult, I think I’ve been nothing but accommodating. You could’ve had Felis as a goddess. I think you got off well with me. I’m much more lenient than my sisters and brothers.” She peeked over her shoulder at me and in her silver eyes I saw honesty. This was the only time it was ever there, though. Only when she was here, in the heart of her domain where nobody could get to her easily. 

“Just because you’re more lenient, does not make you better. It just means I can get away with a lot more stuff, for better or worse.” I stepped closer to her so I could look at her better. 

“I understand it isn’t easy, Luna dear, but it’s life. Just because we hand chose you, doesn’t mean your life will be better or even easier.” 

“That’s the understatement of the century.” Lupa snorted then and smiled a small, but still brilliant, smile at me. 

“No, the understatement of the century is back when Belbus said that Bercelack had a bit of a temper after he’d set him on fire.” The side of my mouth kicked up, against my will I might add, and she smiled wider beofer she turned back around to face the lake. 

“I am sorry, though, that you’ve had to live this life. It’s not easy, this life you’ve been given.” 

“I’ll say.” I sighed out before finally standing next to her and sitting down beside her, my feet and hers next to each other. 

“How many times have you died Luna? How many times have you felt the cold of the lake on your skin?” Her voice had taken on something else, something dark. Something sad. 

“Three.” Was all my lips, which seemed chapped, could say. 

“Once, when you were a baby and you didn’t know what was happening. You just got too sick, and then your heart gave out. Then, on your first trip to the White House as a representative for the wolf and human shifter alliance and an assassasin hired by the government shot you four times in your head and chest. And now.” She had folded her hands on her lap, feigning calm. 

“And now, after having brought Leo to his sense before his grief consumed him making him useless for the war.” I finished for her, staring out into the soothing water. 

“Yes. And now.” We were silent for a while then, no words worthy enough  to ruin this sovereign moment. 

“Your mother is skirting on the edge. She’s not sure how much more she, or your family, can take before the war ruins it all.” 

“Well, she’s not the only one.” I said, meaning for it to be under my breath but in that moment nothing couldn’t be said. 

“My Lily, she thinks that you can handle this. That your family, when this is over and what is left, can and will go on. I’ve always trusted her, she’s got that logic and reasoning that I try to have. I trust her, but it seems now she’s blinded by you.” I waited for her to finish her thought, but she seemed to be lost in them. I took a deep breath and looked to her then, and realized that I never really did look at her. I was never enraptured with her like every other wolf was, she was just my supervisor and I’d written her off. But now. Now that I’d looked at her, she was beautiful. Her nose was soft and small, her eyes the softest gray and seemed to shine brightly like the moon.  Her lips were pouty and full, and freckles were smattered like dirt over her face. Her hair was black, super black, but through it ran the brown, red, and silver of the wolves she gave life to. She was beautiful. 

“Mother Moon?” She looked to me then, her eyes wide with the shock that I talked directly to her. Her eyes searched mine, and for once in my life I wondered what she thought of me. 

“I can promise you that the Green family will survive this. That I will survive this. When Lily chose me, she saw something and when you looked me over you had to have seen something too. Trust that. Trust me. I will not let you down.” My hand reached down and cupped her hand and she squeezed my fingers softly in her soft and large hand. She smiled a soft, motherly smile, and cocked her head slowly to the side.  

“I believe you, LunaRosa. I always have. You are significantly strong. I wish your life didn’t have to be like this. Victor or not, you shouldn’t have to live like this. But, you know that I couldn’t meddle the lines even if I wanted to.” 

“The lines have never seen to be in my favor, I don’t blame anybody. Even though it expressly feels like I’m blaming you. I don’t mean to, it’s just hard not to blame somebody when my whole life has seemed to be some sort of experiment for Fate to fuck around with.” She scoffed and rolled her eyes, as her relationship with Fate was rocky at best. The only reason Fate was one of her consorts was because Mother Moon cared about her wolves and wanted them to have mates. 

“When I decided to become involved closely with fate, I knew that meant that they and I were going to have rocky lives at best. It was the best thing for them, though. I didn’t have anybody telling me how to be a proper goddess or even helping me out. All of us were thrown into the deep end, and Gaia couldn’t help us. None of us knew what to do, but I knew that I never wanted them to be alone. I wanted them to have a mate, and have that guaranteed, to share their days with. Fate took it upon herself to stay in your lives, and mine for that matter, simply because she wanted to.” She scoffed and rolled her eyes before looking out at the lake, her silver eyes shining brightly in their light. We were quiet for a while then, but it wasn’t like it usually was in its uncomfort. It was pleasant. She took a big breath, a clearing one, and the forest