Fighting by Anaya Phoenix (black books to read txt) 📕

“I think it’s time I got you healed up so you can go back home.” I said nothing, just watched as she went into the water and her hair followed her. The water came up to just under her breasts, and her hair fanned out around her, creating ink clouds in the clear water. She looked back at me and held out her hand, her lips slightly upturned and her eyes slowly blending into the aged cognac of her wolf. But Mother Moon had a spectacular ability that all the Gods had, she could be both. One of her eyes turned amber while the other stayed the shocking steel gray that seemed to only be unique to her. 

“Come now, my child.” Her voice was low and soft, but was everywhere at the same time. She was talking to every part of me, reaching in and touching all the parts that I was at once and beckoning me to her. I took her hand and settled into the water, it came up a little under my armpit but it wasn’t cold. It was warm and relaxing, designed to swaddle you. She held my hand as we walked further into the lake which stayed at the same level throughout. She softly hummed under her breath before she pulled me in front of her, lovingly looking down at me. My wolf preened at her attention and I sighed softly at the song. She put one of her hands on my forehead and the other on the back of my head, all the while humming, before she gently pushed me under the water. I kept my eyes open the entire time and saw her soft smile and her eyes, so eerily different but so beautiful at the same time. She lifted me up and pushed the red strings of my hair back before tilting my head up. The moon was there, and I wasn’t sure if it’d been there the whole time or if it’d come when I was under. Her humming gradually got louder and the moon got closer, but still looked so far away. Her hand trailed down from my forehead to my chest, resting just above my left breast, where my heart was. It currently wasn’t beating, I was dead in the real world and Eternal reflected that. Suddenly the moon was right behind Mother Moon, large and swollen and so bright. With her hand still on my chest and that small smile still in place on her lips, she lifted her face to the sky and howled loud and fierce; a slow keening cry that called to somewhere deep inside of me. 

                The moon twisted and turned in place, seeming agitated by her cry, before it suddenly stopped and its glow intensified. She went back to looking at me and smiled wider to reveal her fangs, that were bigger than I’d ever seen but they didn’t seem that scary right now. She pressed her hand harder into my chest as her other hand raised and reached behind her to lay her hand on the moon. The glow soaked into her hand and into her body, traveling its way down until it was in her hand that was on my chest. Nothing happened and suddenly everything was quiet, so quiet it hurt my ears. She leaned down until she was eye level with me, taking her hand off the moon and cupping my cheek. 

“Beat again, my daughter.” She whispered to me before kissing my forehead. The world came back then, loud and there, but amongst all the sounds was my heartbeat. I gasped a hard breath and my wolf surged forward at my sudden emotion. Mother Moon chuckled and stood back to her full height, the moon no longer behind her. She dropped her hand from my chest and turned, her hair following her. The water was cold now, freezing in fact, and I hastily followed after her resisting the urge to shudder. She hopped back on the bank and I followed her, but kept my legs out of the icy water. 

“Your mother weeps for you, she does not know this isn’t permanent.” I felt guilty then and looked down. 

“The other two times she wasn’t around. When I was a baby, I’d been with auntie Carrie and she was sleeping. She didn’t know. The second time, my mother just assumed I was badly hurt. Not dead.” 

“Your entire family mourns for you. Your mate is howling to me as we speak.” I focused only on my heartbeat, listening to that instead of the words. I knew why she was telling me this. 

“They must know, Luna. They have to be prepared for when this is entirely permanent.” Anger surged in me, and it returned the heat that I’d lost from being in the lake for so long. 

“They don’t need to know anything. They know that death happens in war-“ 

“They think that you’re immune.” 

“My death will simply be another casualty, one that they will grow used to.” 

“A pack will be left without a complete mating pair, a mother without her child, a wolf without his mate.” 

“It happens all the time!” 

“Not with you, Luna. It doesn’t happen with you.” I was silent then, my rage offering me a something to concentrate on. 

“You know how significant you are to them, but you act as if you’re an average wolf-“ 

“Has it ever occurred to you that, that might be good for me? My life as fucked up as it is, I think I deserve to play pretend for just a little while.” I hated that my voice cracked, but I got the sentence out. 

“I thought you completing the bond was you playing pretend, even though it was reckless.” 

“Reckless?! Weren’t you urging me to mate him!?” 

“When you were younger, not practically on the eve of war.” I was quiet then before I stood up, suddenly too angry for words. I turned and walked away from her. 

“Be angry all you’d like Luna, that doesn’t make what you’re doing any less stupid or dangerous.” With a snarl I shifted into my wolf and ran away from her domain and kept running until I was tired. I caught my breath and shifted back, before taking a calming breath. I closed my eyes and let myself back into my body. 

      The transfer wasn’t instant, it was like my soul was being sifted back into my body. I knew that I was back, but I was absolutely freezing. I couldn’t smell or breathe yet, and I certainly couldn’t hear or speak. Something or someone was touching me, I couldn’t exactly tell what but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Suddenly, because I’m sure Mother Moon was acting a bit spiteful that I ran away from her and we didn’t have enough time for me to ease into this, it was like I was forced back into my body. My eyes opened and my chest cleared. I choked on a breath as I sat up, pushing whatever was on me off in my shock. Everything hurt because it was entirely too fast and sudden. I could hear everything and everyone, and feel everything going on around me. I heard a shriek and looked to the sound to see a tigress on the floor crawling backwards away from me, her face stuck in fear. My brows furrowed and I looked down to see a sheet made of pure silk with gold lined through it. Narrowing my eyes I pushed the sheet off and saw the dress that most likely my mother put me in. I lifted my hair and realized it was washed with something fruity smelling. I tapped my head and felt the crown of flowers that they placed on me. I looked down and around me, scoffing at the candles and the earth slab I was laying on. 

“Really? You buried me?” I asked softly, my voice low and gravelly. I stood up, careful not to knock down a candle or disturb anything and pulled my ridiculously long dress down and gathered it into my hands. The tigress stood up and held her fists. 

“I don’t know what you are, but you chose the wrong chick to inhabit. You know how many people are going to knock some sense into you?” She tried to sound tough, but her voice wavered. I rolled my eyes and walked past her, noticing that she scurried away from me. My hair trailed behind me in long waves and continued to walk, going past everyone and their shocked glances. I twisted and turned through the halls, avoiding the training halls on purpose, and going to where they all would be if they’d buried me.    

                It was now a tradition to bury wolves in white and adorn them with lilies and their favorite flowers to pay respect and wish them a pure start when Mother Moon recycled their wolves. The wolf would then be on display for a day or two, Mother Moon keeping them from decaying while people could pay their respects to the person, before that person was to be buried. While the person was on display, their mates and families sort of sat shivah in that they mourned in their house for the first day and the second day they went for a run before burying the wolf and howled to the heavens for them. I’d only been gone for a day, so they’d be in Ander’s room. Ander didn’t feel that I was back yet, the link hadn’t been completely fused back together yet and I knew the victors wouldn’t want to feel for my link and feel what would’ve been death. Taking a deep breath I walked to his room and stopped before just going in and smiled softly at the silence before entering. At first nobody paid attention, all of them looking down or into a vacant space. It broke my heart to see Ander sitting on his bed with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. Something told me that was how he stayed since I died. Softly sighing, I cleared my throat and put my hands behind my back. They all looked at me and suddenly they were feral. My eyes widened and I stepped back, bringing my elemental weapon to me and crouching down with a snarl on my lips. 

“Who are you?” Filly growled out, her hair seeming more wild now that her eyes were red and she was rightly pissed off. 

“It’s me, you idiot.” I snarled at her, my eyes flitting to all of them. I watched as they got more stiff and Ander stood up. His eyes slowly lifted and they were such a dark green that they looked almost black. He walked forward slowly, and they parted for him but watched him. If they thought I was possessed I could understand their fear, he would damage my body beyond repair if he thought a demon was inside of me. 

“My mate is dead. And you decide that taking her body from her resting place and coming to us, to me, was a good idea.” His voice sounded so calm as he walked closer to me. I stood from my crouched position and dropped my elemental weapon, looking him directly in his eyes pleading with him to understand. 

“It’s me, Ander.” He flinched and I could see from the way his muscles twitched that he was restraining from hitting me. 

“You love me, and I love you. We met when we were thirteen and almost fought each other.” 

“Demon, I suggest you shut up now if you want to remain here and in that casing.” My mother hissed through her teeth, stepping forward only to be held back by Jesse. I