Life is a bit of hell by Cache' Evans (the chimp paradox .TXT) 📕

Every morning I came to sit on the beach. It took away some of the frustration sitting here away from everything. I thought of the times when dad, mom, and I would come here how we use to laugh together. That definitely wasn’t us now. Since dad left for this young women named Destiny. I remember sneaking out the house to come here to get away from all the yelling and crying. I know mom could feel that her marriage was over but she kept fighting trying to make everything work out. I knew that they weren’t going to stay together but I wanted everything to work out too. That didn’t even take place Destiny worked her way in our lives even more. Daddy start saying he had to work over time. I knew it all was a lie. I just didn’t get her name Destiny. Every time I heard her name I got mad. Yeah it must was so destined for her to come in our lives and break up our family. When mom and dad finally got divorced he told mom she could keep the house. Mom looked at him like he was stupid and told him she was already going to keep the house no matter what he said. Daddy always said that if mom wasn’t working so much at her restaurant that their relationship would never lead him to cheat. I thought that was the stupidest thing I ever heard come out of his mouth.
I get up to start walking home I have to help mom today down at the restaurant. I’ve been helping there every since her and daddy got divorced I kind of like it. All I do is take orders from her and her second base helper Julian and wash a cotillion of dishes. So when I get in the house mom is pacing around in the kitchen looking for her keys. “Jay is that you, she screams?” “Yes mom, I’m about to go upstairs and get ready, I yell back down the stairs.” I go upstairs and hurry up and put my clothes on for the restaurant. I come back down stairs mom is shaking her keys in her hand. “So you’re ready and I told you about that shirt. You don’t have your shirt hanging down on your pants. This is a business you’re not about to go run around with your friends. How will you ever be able to get a job if you don’t know how to dress?” I hate when she starts her two hour speeches she goes on and on. I just nod my head at her and say mom I’m only sixteen I’ll get it. Mom looks in the rearview mirror in the car to check her makeup. When we get to the restaurant she rushes me to the back to see what needs to be done. Julian sees me come in and says, “I’m glad you finally made it now get to the sink and wash those dishes.” I wash all those dishes that just never stop coming and mom comes in the back. “Hello everyone mom says in her most cheerful voice. How is everything back here?” Betty smiles at mom and says, “It’s going, how about out there?” Mom starts laughing like that’s the funniest thing she’s ever heard. We all look at her like she’s crazy. “Mom is you okay, I ask.” She stops laughing and says, “Yes sweetie I am I’m just laughing because everything is always chaotic out there but like Betty said its going. Also your father said he’ll be here to pick you up in an hour to take you out to lunch.” After she says all that she walks back out to her chaotic customers. I go back to the sink and start back washing dishes. I guess that’s part of being the dish washer at a restaurant. After awhile I hear mom and dad by the door arguing. “Why is she always at this restaurant cleaning? This is not her responsibility to be doing all of this, dad complains to mom.” “Well this help her with independents and she needs responsibility maybe she won’t end up like you. Leaving all of your responsibility, mom argues.” “Jasmine don’t, I don’t have time. I just want to pick up my daughter to have lunch with her.” I leave the sink to go. I walk to the door and open it. “Hi daddy I’m about to go to the car. Mom I’ll see you when you come home tonight.” “I’ll be right behind you honey, dad says.” Mom waves at me while I’m walking out of the restaurant. Daddy gets in the car and it start the engine. His phone starts ringing. I just sit back, wishing I was lying in the rain on the beach. He gets off the phone. “Well, sweeties don’t be mad but I got to handle some business with Destiny. So I’m going to just drop you off home. Is that okay with you? “I start laughing how mama start laughing. “Is that okay with me, I scream at him. I don’t care what you do but you’re not taking me home.” He looks at me for awhile. “Honey I’m going to have to take you home. Where else are you going to go?” I rolled my eyes at him and opened the car door. “Daddy I rather walk home. I guess I’ll see you when you’re not too busy pampering your new wife.” I get out of the car and start walking. I turned around I didn’t see his car moving so I guess it didn’t matter to him if some stranger came and grabbed me.
When I got in the house it was like twenty messages on the answer machine. I listened to them they were mostly mom. I could tell and her voice she was panicking. On one of her messages she said she was on her way home. I went upstairs to my room and got my iPod and start listening to my music that makes me calm. I heard the door slam and then I heard mom footsteps coming up the stairs. She screams, “Jayla Smith how dare you walk out your father car and start walking in all that rain. I can’t believe you your dad was confused at your sudden behavior.” I throw my iPod down on the bed and open my door. “My sudden behavior you act like I went to go rob the bank.” She rolls her eyes at me and goes in her room. “Well you act like you have. Why are you acting like this? You never suppose to let your father think that I’m not taking care of you.” I scream on the top of my lung to remove some of the frustration I feel. “I’m so sick and tired of all of this crap. Mom I’m sorry but I don’t want to stay her for awhile I don’t want to be here in the summer going through this crude and I don’t want to see you and dad for awhile. Can I please go stay with Aunt Margaret? Please mama I need some time away from here or I think I’ll kill myself.” I sit on the stairs crying and mama sits on the edge of her bed crying. “Jay please don’t do this, the words comes out in staggers.” I’m crying so hard I can barely speak. “Mom I need this just for the summer. Please mom just for the summer I really need this you and dad don’t need me here. He got his new family and you got the restaurant. Maybe stuff will calm down a little about time I’m back.” I go in her room and sit on the edge of the bed with her and let her cry on my shoulder. “Mama I love you, I really do but so much has happen. I need some time away.” She shakes her head yes. I hug her and cry on her lap.
I fall asleep hearing voices far away downstairs. When I wake up I hear her on the phone her voice is still cracked from all the crying she did. “Yea Margaret she wants to stay with you over the summer. I know I should have never put this all on her. I know Margaret. I’ll get her a plane ticket next week and she’ll be on her way. Ok, love you too. Bye.” I sat up on the bed mom looks over at me her eyes is still red. She smiles weakly and says, “I’m about to go downstairs to make tea Rebecca is coming over to talk. I nod my head at her and go to my room. I close my door and lay back on my bed. I know in a little while I’ll be able to hear. I get up and go open my balcony to my room and walk down the stairs from my balcony. I look at the beach I know I don’t need to be going over there this late so I walk back up the balcony. When I get to my room I hear Rebecca’s voice carry through the vents. She tries to comfort mom. “Jazmine you know she is going through a stage in her life. It’s normal at her age. She will be back to normal and no time. Just let her go clear her mind over the summer with your sister.” Know I hear mom voice carrying through the vent. “Becca I don’t think this is a stage in her life. I think she is really hurt. I and Mark just never paid attention to it. Now we can’t help her because it’s serious. Margaret though will help her through this. She helped me when I ended up pregnant and I had to end up getting an abortion she was there through all of it. If she could help me I know she’ll be able to help Jayla.” I block their voices out I don’t want to hear no more talking. I take my journal and start writing in it.

Dear Diary,
I think I scared my mom today. I know that I shouldn’t run away from my problems but they just keep coming. I’m tired and I just want to be there with Aunt Margaret. It’s not just the divorce it’s how I get treated. I always have these bad flashes of when I was gone with my friend Tia we went partying. Anyways everything is complicated around here I just want to get away for awhile just to be alone. A new place, new things, and new people. Everything will be better.


I lay in my bed in close my eyes. Mom comes in and shakes me. “Sweetie are you hungry?” I shake my head no. “Well even if your not should at least try to eat something.” I sit up on my bed and stare at her for a minute. “Mom I’m not hungry and I don’t want to eat. You think food solves everything it doesn’t.” She sighs, “Well you haven’t been eating lately and look at how skinny you are. It’s like your anorexic.” I throw my head back on my pillow. “Know I’m an anorexic because I don’t want to eat. Well I probably am food doesn’t help every god damn thing.” Mom looks at me shocked. She slaps me my face is stinging and it feels swollen. I look at her while she goes out my room and slams my door. I felt like screaming but I didn’t I just laid back and my bed. I hear mom downstairs in the kitchen moving glass and plates around.