The Two Confessions by John Whitbourn (good books to read for adults .TXT) 📕

temptation, Samuel-out-of-depth, to others who could not resist. Acold-eyed man out of Rome clearly expounded your sins during my appointment inthe Westminster Citadel. He was gracious enough to receive me because I bore abishop's recommendation, and because I had been in the Holy Land, as had he. Bythe by, I suspect his time there was less innocent than mine, even though I hadoccasion to fight at Aleppo and in the Druze Country. I admit that I wasfrightened of him: I who have no fear of death! But even that was eclipsed bylearning of your oh-so narrow escape.’

Aswith Farncombe's letter, Samuel could guess. Roman visitors oftenarrived in nations to deal in deaths - of people and places and institutions.The thought of insignificant him attracting their fish-like stare was a realbowel-churner.

‘Isee...,’ he said.

‘Oh,how I doubt that, Trevan-of-fools-rushing-in. Your money-lust, which I concedewas driven by another, more laudable, lust - if such a thing can be – was makingwaves in much bigger pools. Seas and oceans even. Listen and learn, foolishchild: learn that cheaper and better and more abundant... rifles may well earnthe pennies of generals and Kings, but, thank God, they are not to every taste.The Roman said you may have ended as a Duke or Earl, if permitted to continue.But by then England would be well-armed and expansive; and Scotland and Irelandand France would have to take heed. Shortly, the Empire would require riflearmies - and so therefore would the Turks and Mamelukes - and thus the BeninHorse-tribes and Zimbabwe and Cathay and… eventually everyone. You hadbecome Mars’ ambassador on Earth! Can you believe it, Samuel? A midget horsemanof the Apocalypse riding out of Lewes! And the Archbishop of London, perhapseven the Holy Father himself, has heard your name!’

Withthat charge sheet there was no point in pretending unconcern. Samuel had tosearch around for words.

‘I...thought it was the Trade Guilds - and the Church commercial rules, that... youknow….’

‘Themas well, Samuel; though I presume you bought off the first and hid from thesecond. No, they merely served as pretext to bring you down. If you hadselected another trade in which to prosper, perchance you might have continuedmuch longer in your exploitations. Not for ever, naturally, but long enough foryour one great need.’

Samuelreeled that in and, overcoming his repulsion, dined on it. It tasted bitter andhe doubted the flavour would ever leave his mouth. He got up. It wasn't clearto him how long the pause in conversation had lasted.

‘Ohwell,’ he said (though it was just something to say), ‘thanks for that. Now atleast I know….’

‘Andfrom knowledge I pray there may grow wisdom. Your life is spared, Samuel; therewill even be a small pension to sustain it, but – and mark this well - no more business.No more employment. And, I shudder to say, no more freedom.’

Trevanwas still digesting the discovery that there was an order of magnitude abovecatastrophe, and depths to fall into below the abyss. It was a wider, moregrown-up, world than he'd credited.

Omarhammered the point home.

‘Youwill always be under scrutiny, always suspect. Tread with care, Samuel; takethe one route mercifully left open to you.’

‘Right.Which is to where, incidentally?’

‘Whereyou first came from, in the far West. Here is your file, child.’

Omarretrieved another item from his scrip, a slim, faded, paper folder tied with agrey band. Trevan didn't move to accept it.

‘You did not need it before, Samuel; all your mind wason the future, not the past. Also, there is little enough within, alas.However, the Church required of me a place where you might find sanctuary andmerit forgiveness. Since Lewes will not have you, I could think of no other. Ishall pray that there are people there who still recall you.’

‘Well, you do that, Father.’ Samuel was grim faced andtook the file in a grip which flaked its dry paper. ‘But I'm none too sure I wantpeople right now.’

Father Omar shrugged. ‘I had hoped there might be atleast one person you would stay constant to - two if you include myself. Butlet that pass. Your present condition reminds me of my other purpose here andthe remaining obligation on you.’

‘They want more flesh?’

‘No, not flesh but spirit, Samuel. It is required thatyou obtain absolution after full confession. If that is not confirmed to theArchbishop's staff they will not release you. What your fate would be then Icannot say. Save that it would not be good. I and Lewes and England would notsee you again I think. Therefore ponder hard on it, I beseech. As you are atpresent, knowing your stubborn resolve, where would you find a priest laxenough to absolve you? Whereas only I in all this mighty City knows the realSamuel Trevan and that he would not truly persevere in evil.’

Samuelbriefly glanced within and saw it was so. Yet he still couldn't control hissense of betrayal for longer than two words.

‘Whereasyou alone,’ he half-accused the only parent he'd ever known, ‘would absolve myinsincere confession.’

‘Thatchoice of phrase is yours, Samuel. I see things differently. Take theopportunity offered.’

Trevan'sface was set. He had come to the very end of (open) rebellion against fate.

‘Oh,don’t worry: I shall,’ he said - and straightaway knelt down on thethreadbare carpet.

‘Forgive me, Father,’ he recited through grittedteeth, ‘for I have sinned: thorough my fault, my own fault, my own most grievousfault....’

U[U[U[U[U[U[U

cHAPTER 12

'... your gross deceptions as to your true character, which have broughtsuch embarrassment to this family, render you unfit to bear the name of aChristian, let alone a Christian gentleman. The last service that you mayrender to me and mine, and the very least that is owed to us, is that youobliterate any recollection or trace of this most regrettable association. Tothink that my dearest daughter....

…

... any attempt to renew our lamentable acquaintance will be met by theseverest consequences that Temporal and Spiritual law permit.

I am, sir,

Mr MFarncombe'

Samuelcrumbled the single sheet such that, though compressed, it made not theslightest show of straightening out. He noticed Farncombe had used the cheapestof his two types of stationary.

Theenvelope would have gone the same way but for an anomalous red circle aroundone corner of