Manners and Social Usages by Mrs John M. E. W. Sherwood (best english novels for beginners .TXT) đź“•
Now the question comes up, and here doctors disagree: When may alady call by proxy, or when may she send her card, or when mustshe call in person?
After a dinner-party a guest must call in person and inquire ifthe hostess is at home. For other entertainments it is allowed, inNew York, that the lady call by proxy, or that she simply send hercard. In sending to inquire for a person's health, cards may besent by a servant, with a kindly message.
No first visit should, however, be returned by card only; thiswould be considered a slight, unless followed by an invitation.The size of New York, the great distances, the busy life of awoman of charities, large family, and immense circle ofacquaintances may render a pers
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answered by the fortunate recipient immediately, in the most
formal manner, and the engagement should be scrupulously kept if
accepted. If the subsequent illness or death of relatives, or any
other cause, renders this impossible, the hostess should be
immediately notified.
A gentleman is never invited without his wife, nor a lady without
her husband, unless great intimacy exists between the parties, and
the sudden need of another guest makes the request imperative.
The usual hour for dinner-parties in America is seven o’clock; but
whatever the hour, the guests should take care to be punctual to
the minute. In the hall the gentleman should find a card with his
name, and that of the lady whom he is to take in, written on it,
and also a small boutonniere, which he places in his
button-hole. On entering the drawing-room the lady goes first, not
taking her husband’s arm. If the gentleman is not acquainted with
the lady whom he is to take in to dinner, he asks his hostess to
present him to her, and he endeavors to place himself on an
agreeeble footing with her before they enter the dining-room.
When the last guest has arrived, dinner is ready, and the butler
makes his announcement. The host leads the way, with the lady to
whom the dinner is given, and the hostess follows last, with the
gentleman whom she wishes to honor.
The people who enter a modern dining-room find a picture before
them, which is the result of painstaking thought, taste, and
experience, and, like all works of art, worthy of study.
The first thought of the observer is, “What a splendid bit of
color!” The openwork, white tablecloth lies on a red ground, and
above it rests a mat of red velvet, embroidered with peacock’s
feathers and gold lace. Above this stands a large silver salver or
oblong tray, lined with reflecting glass, on which Dresden swan
and silver lilies seem floating in a veritable lake. In the middle
of this long tray stands a lofty vase of silver or crystal, with
flowers and fruit cunningly disposed in it, and around it are
placed tropical vines. At each of the four corners of the table
stand four ruby glass flagons set in gold, standards of beautiful
and rare designs. Cups or silver-gilt vases, with centres of cut
glass, hold the bonbons and smaller fruits. Four candelabra hold
up red wax-candles with red shades, and flat, glass troughs,
filled with flowers, stand opposite each place, grouped in a
floral pattern.
At each place, as the servant draws back the chair, the guest sees
a bewildering number of glass goblets, wine and champagne glasses,
several forks, knives, and spoons, and a majolica plate holding
oysters on the half shell, with a bit of lemon in the centre of
the plate. The napkin, deftly folded, holds a dinner-roll, which
the guest immediately removes. The servants then, seeing all the
guests seated, pass red and black pepper, in silver pepper-pots,
on a silver tray. A small, peculiarly-shaped fork is laid by each
plate, at the right hand, for the oysters. Although some ladies
now have all their forks laid on the left hand of the plate, this,
however, is not usual. After the oysters are eaten, the plates are
removed, and two kinds of soup are passed—a white and a brown
soup.
During this part of the dinner the guest has time to look at the
beautiful Queen Anne silver, the handsome lamps, if lamps are used
(we may mention the fact that about twenty-six candles will well
light a dinner of sixteen persons), and the various colors of lamp
and candle shades. Then the beauty of the flowers, and, as the
dinner goes on, the variety of the modern Dresden china, the
Sevres, the Royal Worcester, and the old blue can be discussed and
admired.
The service is ďż˝ la Russe; that is, everything is handed by the
servants. Nothing is seen on the table except the wines (and only
a few of these), the bonbons, and the fruit. No greasy dishes are
allowed. Each lady has a bouquet, possibly a painted reticule of
silk filled with sugarplums, and sometimes a pretty fan or ribbon
with her name or monogram painted on it.
At his right hand each guest finds a goblet of elegantly-engraved
glass for water, two of the broad, flat, flaring shape of the
modern champagne glass (although some people are using the long
vase-like glass of the past for champagne), a beautiful Bohemian
green glass, apparently set with gems, for the hock, a ruby-red
glass for the claret, two other large white claret or Burgundy
glasses, and three wine-glasses of cut or engraved glass.
Harlequin glasses, which give to the table the effect of a bed of
tulips, are in fashion for those who delight in color and variety.
The hostess may prefer the modern napery, so exquisitely
embroidered in gold thread, which affords an opportunity to show
the family coat of arms, or the heraldic animals—the lion and the
two-headed eagle and the griffin—intertwined in graceful shapes
around the whole edge of the table and on the napkins.
As the dinner goes on the guest revels in unexpected surprises in
the beauty of the plates, some of which look as if made of solid
gold; and when the Roman punch is served it comes in the heart of
a red, red rose, or in the bosom of a swan, or the cup of a lily,
or the “right little, tight little” life-saying boat. Faience,
china, glass, and ice are all pressed into the service of the
Roman punch, and sometimes the prettiest dish of all is hewn out
of ice.
We will try to see how all this picture is made, beginning at the
laying of the table, the process of which we will explain in
detail in the next chapter.
CHAPTER XXXI. LAYING THE DINNER-TABLE.
The table, after being drawn out to its proper length, should be
covered with a cotton-flannel tablecloth—white, if the table-cover
is the ordinary damask; red, if the open work table-cover is to be
used. This broad cotton flannel can be bought for eighty cents a
yard. The tablecloth, if of white damask, should be perfectly
ironed, with one long fold down the middle, which must serve the
butler for his mathematical centre. No one can be astray in using
fine white damask. If a lady wishes to have the more rare Russian
embroidery, the gold embroidered on the openwork tablecloth, she
can do so, but let her not put any cloth on her table _that will not
wash_. The mixed-up things trimmed with velvet or satin or ribbon,
which are occasionally seen on vulgar tables, are detestable.
The butler then lays the red velvet carpet, or mat, or ornamental
cover—whatever it may be called—down the centre of the table, to
afford a relief of color to the �pergne.
This is a mere fanciful adjunct, and may be used or not; but it has
a very pretty effect over an openwork, white tablecloth, with the
silver tray of the �pergne resting upon it. In many families there
are silver �pergnes which are heirlooms. These are now valued for
old association’s sake; as are the silver candlesticks and silver
compotiers. But where a family does not possess these table
ornaments, a centre piece of glass is used. The flat basket of
flowers, over which the guests could talk, has been discarded, and
the ornaments of a dinner-table are apt to be high, including the
lamps and candelabra which at present replace gas.
The tablecloth being laid, the centre and side ornaments placed,
the butler sees that each footman has a clean towel on his arm, and
then proceeds to unlock the plate chest and the glass closet.
Measuring with his hand, from the edge of the table to the end of
his middle finger, he places the first glass. This measurement is
continued around the table, and secures a uniform line for the water
goblet, and the claret, wine, hock, and champagne glasses, which are
grouped about it. He then causes a plate to be put at each place,
large enough to hold the majolica plate with the oysters, which will
come later. One footman is detailed to fold the napkins, which
should be large, thick, fine, and serviceable for this stage of the
dinner. The napkins are not folded in any hotel device, but simply
in a three-cornered pyramid that will stand holding the roll or
bread. The knives, forks, and spoons, each of which is wiped by the
footman with his clean towel, so that no dampness of his own hand
shall mar their sparkling cleanliness, are then distributed. These
should be all of silver; two knives, three forks, and a soup-spoon
being the usual number laid at each plate.
Before each plate is placed a little salt-cellar, either of silver
or china, in some fanciful shape. Tiny wheelbarrows are much used. A
carafe holding water should be put on very late, and be fresh from
the ice-chest.
Very thin glasses are now used for choice sherry and Madeira, and
are not put on until the latter part of the dinner, as they may be
broken.
Menu-holders or card-holders of china or silver are often placed
before each plate, to hold the card on which the name of the guest
is printed and the bill of fare from which he is to choose. These
may be dispensed with, however, and the menu and name laid on each
plate.
The butler now turns his attention to his sideboards and tables,
from whence he is to draw his supplies. Many people make a most
ostentatious display of plate and china on their sideboards, and if
one has pretty things why not show them? The poorer and more modest
have, on their sideboards, simply the things which will be needed.
But there should be a row of large forks, a row of large knives, a
row of small ones, a row of table-spoons, sauce-ladles, dessert-spoons, fish-slice and fork, a few tumblers, rows of claret, sherry,
and Madeira glasses, and the reserve of dinner-plates.
On another table or sideboard should be placed the finger-bowls and
glass dessert-plates, the smaller spoons and coffee cups and
saucers. On the table nearest the door should be the carving-knives
and the first dinner-plates to be used. Here the head footman or the
butler divides the fish and carves the piece de resistance, the
fillet of beef, the haunch of venison, the turkey, or the saddle of
mutton. It is from this sidetable that all the dinner should be
served; if the dining-room is small, the table can be placed in the
hall or adjacent pantry. As the fish is being served, the first
footman should offer Chablis, or some kind of white wine; with the
soup, sherry; with the roast, claret and champagne, each guest being
asked if he will have dry or sweet champagne.
As the plates are removed they should not be kept in the dining-room, but sent to the kitchen immediately, a maid standing outside
to receive them, so that no disorder of the dinner may reach the
senses of the guests, nor even an unpleasant odor. As each plate is
removed a fresh plate must be put in its place—generally a very
beautiful piece of Sevres, decorated with a landscape, flowers, or
faces.
Sparkling wines, hock and champagne, are not decanted, but are kept
in ice-pails, and opened as required. On the sideboard is placed the
wine decanted for Use, and poured out as needed; after the game has
been handed, decanters of choice Madeira and port are placed before
the host, who sends
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