Jase by Fields, J. (ebook reader browser TXT) 📕

are you going on Spring Break? I’ll meet you, just three or four hours and…”

“I’m hanging up now,” and I did.

I shut off my phone and got in my car. I drove to the mobile phone store and changed my number. It was easier than I thought. Until I actually realized what I had done.

I had just cut ties with Jase Steel.

And it hurt.

~

We returned from Spring break and I was burnt to a crisp. I cannot begin to tell express how good it felt to not stare at my phone waiting for a call or text from him. I could relax… finally. My mother and I had more fun than I expected. She is, and always will be, my best friend. Jane and Mimi were a source of ninety percent of the laughs for the whole trip. We splurged and spent two full days out of six in the resort’s spa. Mimi grumbled about it the first day but then when Jose, the most beautiful Mexican man on the planet removed his shirt during a deep tissue massage, she looked like she’d died and gone to heaven. The look in her eyes when he pampered her for the entire day, mirrored how mine must have looked whenever I was in a happy place with…him.

We pulled into the driveway and Thomas’s car was there. Mom looked so happy, she must have missed him. When we walked into the house there were flowers everywhere. Mom gasped and covered her mouth.

“Hold up there beautiful, I didn’t do this,” Thomas looked embarrassed. “But I would have, if I knew it would have made you react like that.”

I grabbed one of the cards and opened it, “Jase.”

I threw it on the ground and went back outside and grabbed the rest of our bags. I walked into Mom and Thomas sucking face.

“I am going to bed. See you in the morning,” I am not sure if they heard me or not but I didn’t care and I am sure they didn’t either.

~

I looked at those flowers every day for a month. The first day my mother watered them and I asked her not to do it again.

“Why?”

“I want to watch them die.”

Yep. I actually said that.

And meant it.

They were a reminder of Jase, and I was going to use them as a focus. Each day they died, so would my love for him. Each day I woke and one was missing, I knew Mom couldn’t let them all die and she knew I needed to get through this in whatever crazy way I deemed fit. I was worse than those women in books, I was a freaking martyr.

~

The research program for the semester was ending. I had decided to spend the summer continuing to work with Thomas on it, there was no funding but it didn’t matter, what we were seeing was almost miraculous. Neither of us wanted to stop. Brad was going home for the summer. I was relieved because the hurt from Jase was lessening and I may just take it out on Brad. I could pull out some Jase Steel moves and have him wrapped around my finger. Of course that may mean I would have to do my hair, and maybe apply some make up. Oh and wax, I was letting that grow, trimming of course, but no wax, and ABSOLUTELY no creams.

I’d be entering my third year in college as a senior, yes, I over-did the course load but it was just the distraction I needed. I was also trying to get my mother to agree to let me take courses over the summer. She insisted I needed a break, and she was right of course, but I also needed to grow up and let my mom live.

Without asking permission, I called Dad and he sent me the money for twelve credits. He also sent me money for three months’ worth of rent. He was shocked I wanted to move out and I let him make assumptions that Mom and I were on the outs.

Mom was shocked as well, “No Carly, send him back the money…”

“My relationship with him is what it is. If it’s easier for him to feel like I need him for money than for a true connection, that’s fine. He’s my father, I love him. I also love you and I know you and Thomas need to move forward, you have already taken a huge step by telling Mimi,” I smiled and wiped away her tears and she laughed.

“You are my priority,” she raised her eyebrows.

“And you are mine, the heart wants what the heart wants right Mom. Thomas wants yours, and you want his.”

“He’s going to move in with both of us, Carly,” she shook her head, “I was going to tell you.”

“Are you kidding me? His house has a pool and is closer to town. This house is…”

“Ours, this house is ours,” I understood how hard she worked for us to have everything we had, plus ensure I had no student loans and at twenty I was ready to become an adult. I would never tell her that of course, she would feel like it was her fault I felt this way and it wasn’t. Damn the woman should be proud, she raised a twenty year old in this day and age that was a virgin.

~

Mom and Thomas moved into our house, he sold his. He couldn’t break her heart either, and with the profit he made, he paid off her house, their house. He was amazing and smart, very smart. His golf night was on Thursday nights, Book Club. He said it was for her but I saw him almost sprint out the door as soon as they started filing in. I loved Thomas, and I loved that he loved my mother.

I even loved my little studio apartment, Dad’s three month allotment got me six months due strictly to the fact that I took a couple months, which gave Mom time to get