Myth 13 - Myth Alliances by Asprin, Robert (ebook reader online free .txt) 📕

seemed inclined to, “it might have been a little like that. Our representatives were persuaded to put our treasury surplus into a game of chance or two. It seemed like a good idea at the time. It was a can't-​miss proposition. If we made a large wager, the re?turns were to be astronomical. They put the idea up as a referendum to the population ...”

“Pareley isn't a kingdom?” I asked.

“Why, no,” Wensley replied, surprised. “Well, it was. That didn't seem at all fair as a system of government. When the old king abdicated, his son announced that he didn't feel wise enough to tell his people what to do, so he wanted everyone to have a voice in deciding how to run the country. That way none of the wisest ideas would be lost, you see.”

“And no one would have to take the blame for bad deci?sions?” Bunny concluded wryly.

“I suppose so,” Wensley conceded. "Everyone seemed quite happy about it at first. Then it became rather cumber-

some, collecting everyone's opinions on every single mat?ter of state. It was only logical that those of us in a large geographical district should pool our opinions and have them presented by one person, although for anyone living close to the border between two zones it was difficult to de?cide which group one ought to give one's opinions to, and some ended up putting in their suggestions twice ..."

“Why did they send you?” I interrupted. Even a small sample of this brand of logic was enough to cross my eyes.

Wensley looked modest. “You see, I'm considered Ñby someÑto be more decisive than most. But I don't know if that's true. It might be. I don't really know.”

“Go on,” I prodded him.

“Er, yes. Well. Naturally, in retrospect it would have been worthwhile to have checked whether the odds were quite so good as we had thought in the beginning, but no one felt it was right to question the motives of our visitors. They seemed so willing to help us increase our treasury!”

“I bet they did,” I smirked. “Did they take all your money?”

“Not all of it,” Wensley hastened to assure us. “Well, most. We could still scrape by. I think they felt sorry for us. So they sold us this.” From inside his tunic he brought out a D-​hopper. It looked functional but in poor condition. “A marvelous device,” he said enthusiastically. “Everyone wanted to have a chance to try traveling to other dimen?sions Ñimagine, before the Deveels came we never knew there were other dimensions! I think perhaps we would have been better off never knowing, because, well, travel can be so expensive, you know ...”

I nodded.

“Your people saw all kinds of new things and went on a buying spree. It happens.”

I knew, because when I first went into the Bazaar at Deva I wanted to buy everything I saw, too. It was lucky for me that I didn't have any money to spend. I still ended up with a baby dragon.

“That's right,” Wensley confirmed. “And the payments we owed for our purchases and the D-​hopper turned out to be more than we could handle. To be honest, Wuhses have never been very good at negotiation. Among ourselves we agree all the time.”

“So you're on the run from bill collectors?” I asked.

“No, no! We always pay our debts. That wouldn't be fair, to cheat someone out of their hard-​earned wages ... well...” Wensley paused. “... out of what we owed them. It's not their fault we weren't experienced enough to han?dle such...”

“Cheats?” Bunny suggested.

Wensley blushed to the roots of his pale hair. “Oh, let's not call them that. But we ran out of money. Almost com?pletely. We needed help.”

“I'm not a financial advisor,” I stated.

“We don't need a financial advisor,” Wensley pleaded, his eyes huge with woe. “We found financial advisors. Now we need help getting rid of them.”

Bunny and I looked at one another, then back to our guest. “Why don't you just ask them to leave?”

“We ... can't,” Wensley quavered, dropping his gaze to the ground. “You just don't tell the Pervect Ten to leave.”

I raised my eyebrows. This was starting to sound inter?esting. “Perfect Ten? They're beautiful women?” I started to picture myself the heroic intercessor between the Wuh?ses and their lovely foes. They'd be so grateful that I stepped in to clear up a misunderstanding. I didn't need to study all the time, did I?

Wensley made a face. “I suppose they are beautiful... though I have to admit that I might be prejudiced against green scales and yellow eyes, and then there are the big teeth ... really off-​putting, but I might not understand the aesthetics of ...”

My ears pricked up. “Wait a minute Ñnot perfect, Per- vect? You went to Pervects for investment advice?”

“Really, it started out as a consulting contract,” Wensley

said desperately. “They came highly recommended. Ten of them came in and within no time ripped out the entire or?ganization we had in place. They assessed our debt struc?ture and our earning potential, and steered us onto a new course. Under their guidance we started small businesses, and they sold the goods to other dimensions. Pretty soon they made us open factories and controlled our expendi?tures. Within a couple of years we were out of debt again. But now they're pretty much in charge of everything. We can't get them to go away.”

'Ten...