Signs for Lost Children by Sarah Moss (top ten ebook reader TXT) 📕
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- Author: Sarah Moss
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‘Oh, we all have our secrets,’ she says. The living and the dead.
The red-haired nurse backs out of the linen closet. ‘Oh. Good afternoon, Mrs. Cavendish. Sorry, Doctor. Come to see Mrs. Elsfield, have you? She’s on her bed. Not much a firm hand wouldn’t cure, in my view.’
Mrs. Ashton looks up. ‘She tried that. A firm hand. Didn’t you, Nurse?’
The nurse puts down her armful of sheets. ‘Now then. We don’t like liars on this ward, Mrs. Ashton. And you wouldn’t want to go upstairs, would you?’
If there are no bruises, Ally thinks, I can do nothing. And one has to pretend to trust the nurses more than the patients or the whole system will collapse.
Mrs. Elsfield looks oddly small lying on her bed with the swathes of a dress fallen over her body like a shroud. She lies on her right, facing the wall, and has turned her face into the crook of her arm. Apart from the blackberries, Ally has never seen any sign that Mrs. Elsfield is in any way disordered.
‘Good morning, Mrs. Elsfield. You’re not feeling well?’
Mrs. Elsfield turns her head, puts her hands over her face and opens her fingers to peek at Ally.
‘Mrs. Elsfield?’
Mrs. Elsfield turns her face back into the mattress. Ally looks around to find Mrs. Middleton gazing over her shoulder.
‘Poor old dear,’ says Mrs. Middleton. ‘She shouldn’t be here, not at this last. And it’s the vicar she’s needing, not the doctor.’
Ally meets Mrs. Middleton’s eyes, perhaps for the first time. The first part of her statement is true.
‘I’d like to examine her and find out about that,’ Ally says. She glances around. There are no screens here, and it seems unlikely that Mrs. Elsfield will rise from her bed and accompany Ally to an office or to the sick ward. ‘Nurse, would you help me to undress her? Gently.’
Watched by Mrs. Middleton, the nurse takes hold of Mrs. Elsfield’s hand screening her face and tugs. ‘Come along now. Don’t make this difficult, Maria Soon be over and done with if you help us.’
Mrs. Elsfield curls herself smaller, tighter. Her thin grey plait, sewn at the end, moves on the pillow. The nurse yanks her hand and Mrs. Elsfield whimpers and tries to burrow away.
‘Leave it,’ says Ally. ‘It doesn’t matter.’
‘They have to do as they’re told or we’ll have no order. Last chance, Maria, or I’m sending for another nurse. Do you want her stripped, doctor, or is it just her chest?’
Mrs. Elsfield shrinks again.
‘Neither. Please, nurse, stop this.’
‘Right. Excuse me.’ The nurse pushes in front of Ally and seizes both of Mrs. Elsfield’s hands, hauls on them. Mrs. Elsfield spits and the nurse slaps her.
‘Stop it,’ says Ally. ‘Nurse, stop it.’
She remembers the housekeeper Jenny slapping May, holding her down and slapping her while May fought and shouted and Ally stood, hands behind her back, waiting her turn.
‘Now you see what we have to put up with.’ The nurse drops Mrs. Elsfield, who curls up again like a released spring. She’ll never get out now, Ally thinks, but she was never going to get out anyway. ‘I’ll call another nurse and we’ll soon have her ready for you. Not that I couldn’t deal with her myself, but we have to keep the rules, don’t we?’
‘No,’ says Ally. ‘Leave it. It doesn’t matter.’
‘It’s no trouble. We do this kind of thing all the time. Have to, in this line of work. Stop that now, Maria, you’re only making things worse for yourself.’
The others watch while two nurses hold Mrs. Elsfield down and open her dress so that Ally, with trembling hands, can listen to her chest. NAD, Ally writes. Nothing abnormal diagnosed.
She’s on her way down the stairs to Ward Two when there are running feet along the corridor. The nurse from the sick ward.
She sees Ally. ‘Where’s Dr. Crosswyn?’
‘Out,’ says Ally. ‘At the hospital.’
‘You’d better come.’
The nurse opens the door of the sick ward and stands back. There is shouting. Mary Vincent, with blood running down her face and a contusion on her forehead with the white gleam of bone behind it, is struggling with two nurses. Her closed dress is torn at the shoulder. Leave me alone, she shouts, get off me. Stop that, say the nurses, stop that at once. The nurse who came to find Dr. Crosswyn goes to their assistance and uses Mary’s hair to pull her to the bed. They put her face-down and fasten a strap around her bare white ankles. Mary arches her bound body and tries to fling herself off the bed but they seize her again.
‘You don’t get out of going upstairs like this, Mary. Thought you could get some more time down here, didn’t you? Stop that now.’
‘Always been sly, haven’t you? Rather be lounging in bed here than on the ward.’
‘She’s hurt,’ says Ally. ‘Her head is hurt.’
The corridor nurse looks up. ‘Some of them’ll try anything. She thinks if she hurts herself she can stay here. Ran herself into the wall.’
Mary howls. The sound makes Ally’s scalp crinkle. Stop, she thinks, stop, I can’t bear it. The doctor can’t bear it.
The other nurse puts her hands on Mary’s head, stubby fingers over her eyeballs. Silence. The nurse looks up. ‘Often works,’ she says to Ally. ‘Don’t have to press very hard, see, on the eyes.’
Ally bites her lip, closes her own eyes. Fingers pressing on the darkness, and one’s arms tied.
‘We’ll take her up, shall we?’ asks the first nurse. ‘You’ll probably find her more docile after a few hours on her
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