The Bookshop of Second Chances by Jackie Fraser (best life changing books .TXT) 📕

the fancy mews flat and throws her fur coat away and she’s going to drop the keys down the drain but changes her mind?’

Now I know what she means. ‘Oh, yes. Paula something. Paula Wilcox.’

‘No,’ interjects Edward, ‘Paula Hamilton. She was a model.’

‘Yes, that’s right. I feel I should channel that.’ I make vigorous ‘channelling’ motions with my hands, and Cerys snorts loudly.

‘Why, though?’ asks Jenny.

‘I don’t know. It just seems like the right thing.’

‘You’re very silly,’ says Edward.

‘You’re just jealous,’ I say, laughing.

‘I am not fucking jealous,’ he says. He slams his glass on the table and is out of his seat and across the bar before any of us can say anything. We all stare at the door as it swings shut.

‘Christ’s sake,’ says Jenny.

‘Don’t go after him,’ says Cerys, but it’s too late, I’m outside and looking about for him. There he is, stalking away towards the shop.

‘Edward!’

He ignores me, and I run after him. Cerys is right. I should let him stew. But I hate being misunderstood.

‘Hey!’ I grab at his arm and he shakes me off. I dart ahead of him and spread my arms to stop him walking on. ‘Hey, what the hell’s your problem?’

‘I don’t have a problem.’ His face is so thunderous I’m surprised he hasn’t actually caused it to rain.

‘Right. Just suddenly decided you needed to go home? After swearing at me?’ He steps forward, and I step backwards. And then again. I look over my shoulder quickly to make sure I’m not going to fall off the kerb. We’re almost at the shop.

‘I wasn’t swearing at you,’ he says. He looks awkward, now, rather than angry.

‘Yes, you were. You said–’

‘I know what I said. And it’s true. I’m not fucking jealous.’

‘Jesus Christ. Listen to yourself. Jealous of my silliness, is what I meant, because you can’t be silly, can you, because you’re a’ – I wave my arms – ‘giant flipping idiot.’

We glare at each other.

‘I’d have let you strop off if I thought you knew what I meant. I knew you didn’t though because you’re such a massive… arse. And I hate to be misunderstood. So’ – I jab my finger at his chest with each word – ‘don’t. You. Dare. Misunderstand. Me.’

He steps forwards, so I step back again. ‘You’re a–’ I continue.

‘What am I?’

‘A giant–’

‘That’s just rude,’ he says. I can see he’s trying not to laugh now, and I have to bite my lip. I’m still pissed off with him though. Making a scene, and making me have to run after him, like he’s a teenager, or my–

‘What the hell is wrong with you?’ I say.

‘I think you put your finger on it,’ he says. ‘I’m a spectacular cunt.’

‘Don’t flatter yourself. You have neither the depth nor the warmth,’ I say, and then he’s really laughing. ‘Or the charm,’ I add.

‘Oh God, Thea Hamilton,’ he says, ‘the things you say. You’re perfect’ – he stumbles slightly over his words – ‘perfectly ridiculous.’

‘It’s hardly ridiculous. In fact, it’s bang on.’

‘This is how you talk to your boss, is it? Shocking.’

We’re laughing at each other, but it all feels strangely serious, or important, maybe. I’m backed against the door of the shop now, and he ducks his head towards me. For a split second, a tiny moment, I think he’s going to kiss me. He doesn’t though. With his lips close enough to my ear I can feel his breath on my cheek, he says, ‘I think this might be a disciplinary issue.’

‘Oh my God.’ I laugh harder. ‘Are you going to get on to HR? That Mr Maltravers is a tyrant.’

I can’t deny I’m totally thrilled by this and if he did kiss me, I’d… Well.

He steps back, folding his arms. ‘Isn’t he, though? I’ll tell him not to be too harsh on you, don’t worry.’

‘I’m terrified.’

‘You look it. Now, if you’ll get out of the way–’

‘Are you going home then?’

‘Cerys has seen me make a dick of myself on numerous occasions,’ he says, ‘but I see no reason to give her the opportunity to laugh in my face.’

‘Oh. Well, okay,’ I say. I squeeze past him so I’m standing on the street. ‘Honestly. I can’t believe I had to run after you.’

‘I’m amazed you did,’ he says. We look at each other for a moment. ‘I’m not worth the effort, you know.’

‘Keep going,’ I say, ‘you’ll convince me eventually. I’ll see you tomorrow.’

Back in the pub, Cerys looks surprised to see me. ‘Oh,’ she says, ‘I didn’t think you’d be back.’

‘My bag’s here,’ I say, ‘and my keys. I wouldn’t be able to get home.’

They exchange glances.

‘You owe me a fiver,’ says Jenny, and I watch, startled, as Cerys gets her wallet out, sighing, and gives her a five-pound note.

‘What’s that for?’

‘We had a bet,’ says Jenny.

I pick up my handbag and narrow my eyes at her suspiciously. ‘What was it?’

‘Never you mind. I’ll win it eventually,’ says Cerys. ‘You off then?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Catch him, did you?’

‘Yeah. What the hell is wrong with him? It’s like being friends with a teenager. A stupid teenager.’

Jenny laughs. Cerys looks serious. ‘He just doesn’t know how to do this stuff.’

‘Did he do this to you when you were first friends?’

A loud crack of laughter. ‘Jesus, no. Although to be fair he did get stroppy on occasion.’

‘I can usually get him to snap out of it,’ I say. ‘But it’s tiring.’

Seventeen

I stand in the hallway and wait for Charles to come and collect me. I’m not nervous because I am not invested in this dinner, even if I did buy a new lipstick, but I am interested to know what he’ll say in response to all the questions I’m going to ask him.

When I was leaving work this evening, Edward said, ‘Without wishing to sound like a prick – please don’t sleep with my brother.’ He wasn’t looking at me when he said it, attention focused on the laptop.

‘Ha ha. What would you do if