Rogue Wave by Isabel Jolie (reading eggs books txt) 📕

When I joined Tate downstairs, he was wiping down the counters.

“Her room turned out nice.” The last time I’d seen it, it had been a shell of white walls and built-ins.

“She needs furniture. I think my idea to get what she likes wasn’t a good one.”

“I think she’ll like anything you get her right now. She seems so eager to please. If you want, I’ll show her a dresser and bedspread, maybe a bedside table and lamp? I can line up several options. Get her to point at what she likes best? I don’t think she’d ever ask for anything. If I were to guess, she’s probably overwhelmed with all she has now.”

“Yes, the adoption agency warned about that. Said to not overwhelm her with gifts.”

“I think you’re doing a good job.”

He wrung out the cloth and hung it over the side of the kitchen sink. He exhaled, and his shoulders rounded. “Thanks. I don’t know what I’m doing. It’s good to hear you don’t think I’m bungling it too badly.”

I laughed. “Well, let’s be real. I know nothing about it. But she seems happy. She’s healthy. Focused and determined. Those are all good things, right? And she referred to you as father.”

“She did?” he asked, incredulous.

“Yeah.” I didn’t get the sense she felt he was her father yet, but using the word was an undeniable start. “She was massaging her jaw, though. Do you think she might need a dentist?”

“Oh. No. She’s been thoroughly examined by all the doctors, including a dentist. She’s healthy. They said to expect her jaw muscles may be sore as she uses different muscles…you know, learning an unfamiliar language.”

“Interesting. Do you give her Advil or something?”

“I haven’t yet, but if she needs it…” He paused, leaving his incomplete thought hanging, and rested his palms on the counter. “Want to go for a walk?”

“Sure.”

He walked over to the stairs and shouted up the stairwell. “Jasmine, we’re going out for a walk.”

He stood three steps up, waited, glancing between me and the top of the stairs. After a beat, Jasmine answered with her own yell. “Okay. I. Read. Then. Go to. Sleep.”

“Good night,” he shouted.

Then she called, “Good. Night.”

I smiled at the scene, and his gaze washed over me. “What?”

“I think you two are making excellent progress toward being a family. I like the new hair cut.” I had liked his hair longer and wavy, but he looked just as attractive. The trim cut wiped out the sun’s highlights, leaving only dark strands. He reached into the hall closet and pulled out a long winter coat.

“Thanks. Here. It’s cold out on the beach. But it’s a clear night.”

All bundled up, we made our way down the wooden boardwalk, our hands buried deep in our coat pockets. The stars lit the night sky, a million brilliant pinpricks over an enigmatic sea. In the distance, lights from the oil rigger off the coast danced. One ship traversed the coast with a spotlight combing the shore.

“You think they’re fishing?” I asked.

He stopped and studied it. “In February? Here? I don’t think so, but…they’re close. Maybe it’s just a yacht traveling down to warmer waters.”

“Judging from the marina, it seems there are many of those. Still, February’s a bit off season.” I scrunched my nose, trying to remember when yachts from far away showed up in the marinas at home. It seemed like they were there year-round.

“Those yachts are the kind that hire someone to make the trip. Wouldn’t expect the owners to head out in undesirable conditions.”

“That’s true. Spring breaks are around the corner. Someone might move their yacht down to the Keys so they can enjoy it in the upcoming season.”

“It’s kind of nice thinking about what a ship is doing out there, right? I used to do that all the time when we’d see lights. Of course, in the South China Sea, you’re also looking for signs it might be pirates or…” He trailed off.

We walked silently and passed several dark, oceanfront homes, before I gathered up my courage.

“Tate, when you were away, did you ever think of me?”

He found a place to sit on an enormous piece of driftwood beached near the dunes. I joined him on the log, placing a couple of feet between us, and waited, hoping he would give me answers.

“Every single night when I looked at the moon.”

“Yeah, I suppose my name sort of does that to people.”

“And every single day.”

“But you couldn’t call? Or text me back?” I didn’t want to sound like a whining kid, but sitting there, I needed to understand.

“What would be the point? An awkward hello that reminds us not only of the distance but that we’re in two different places in our lives? I’m a parent now. And you…you’re…a kid.”

“A kid? I’m a kid? You’re unbelievable, you know that?” I stood and brushed sand off the back of my pants. “It’s not like you thought I was a kid when you had your dick crammed down my throat.”

“Luna, that’s not what I meant, and you know it.”

“Do I? I don’t think I do. Why don’t you spell it out for me? After all, I’m a kid, so better speak slowly and with extreme care.”

“You’ve got your entire life in front of you. That’s what I mean.”

“Oh, then by all means…go away for months, don’t get in touch.” I glared down at his bowed head. “I mean…I don’t know what I mean because I don’t know what you mean.”

He pulled his hair back and looked past me at the ocean, then stood and finally faced me.

“You know what I think?” I shook my index finger at him as anger surged. “I think you’re too chickenshit to put yourself out there. I think you hate missing people, so you wall yourself off. I think you don’t know how to express your emotions, so you don’t even try.”

“Maybe you’re right. Missing people, it hurts, and I hate it. But you’re wrong. I’m not afraid to