The Young Visiters by Daisy Ashford (ebook voice reader .TXT) π
Description
Daisy Ashford was just nine years old when she penned (or rather, penciled) The Young Visiters in her notebook. As an adult, she found the manuscript along with other childhood writings and showed them to her literary friends for a laugh. They were so delighted that they passed them around their circle. The unexpected result was a publishing deal, with J. M. Barrie, creator of Peter Pan, writing the preface. So clever was the book that some assumed Barrie himself had written the entire thing as an elaborate hoax.
The storyβs βheroβ is Alfred Salteena, a polite but bumbling man who hopes to learn the ways of the elite. He is in love with a younger woman, Ethel, but a love triangle with his friend Bernard soon emerges. The characters attend βsumshiousβ balls, stay in lavish βcompartments,β and wear elaborate βget ups,β all of it rendered in Ashfordβs original childish spelling. The story reads like a pastiche of high society and even a parody of the Victorian novel.
The Young Visiters was published in 1919 and was reprinted eighteen times in that year alone. It has been adapted into a play, a musical, and multiple film versions. Ashfordβs other juvenile writings were later published, including The Hangmanβs Daughter, a short novel she considered her finest work. As an adult, she did not continue to write.
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- Author: Daisy Ashford
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It was a sumpshous spot all done up in gold with plenty of looking glasses. Many hansome ladies and gentlemen were already partaking of choice food and rich wines and whiskey and the scene was most lively. Mr. Salteena had a little whiskey to make him feel more at home. Then he eat some curry to the tune of a merry valse on the band. He beat time to the music and smiled kindly at the waiters and he felt very excited inside. I am seeing life with a vengance he muttered to himself as he paid his bill at the desk. Outside Mr. Salteena found a tall policeman. Could you direct me to the Crystale Pallace if you please said Mr. Salteena nervously.
Well said the geniul policeman my advice would be to take a cab sir.
Oh would it said Mr. Salteena then I will do so.
He hailed a Hansome and got speedily in to the Crystal Palace he cried gaily and holding his bag on his knees he prepared to enjoy the sights of the Metropilis. It was a merry drive and all too soon the Palace heaved in view. Mr. Salteena sprang out and paid the man and then he entered the wondrous edifice. His heart beat very fast as two huge men in gold braid flung open the doors. Inside was a lovely fountain in the middle and all round were little stalls where you could buy sweets and lemonade also scent handkerchiefs and many dainty articles. There were a lot of peaple but nobody very noteable.
At last after buying two bottles of scent and some rarther nice sweets which stuck to his teeth Mr. Salteena beheld a wooden door on which was nailed a notice saying To the Privite Compartments.
Ah ha said Mr. Salteena to himself this is evidently my next move, and he gently pushed open the door straitening his top hat as he did so. Inside he found himself in a dimly lit passage with a thick and handsom carpet. Mr. Salteena gazed round and beheld in the gloom a very superier gentleman in full evening dress who was reading a newspaper and warming his hands on the hot water pipes. Mr. Salteena advanced on tiptoe and coughed gently as so far the gentleman had paid no attention. However at the second cough he raised his eyes in a weary fashion. do you want anything he asked in a most noble voice.
Mr. Salteena got very flustered. Well I am seeking the Earl of Clincham he began in a trembly voice are you by any chance him he added most respectfully.
No not exacktly replied the other my name happens to be Edward Procurio. I am half italian and I am the Groom of the Chambers.
What chambers asked Mr. Salteena blinking his eyes.
These said Edward Procurio waving a thin arm.
Mr. Salteena then noticed several red doors with names of people on each one. Oh I see he said then perhaps you can tell me where the Earl of Clincham is to be found.
At the end of the passage fourth door down said Procurio tritely of course he may be out one never knows what they are up to.
I suppose not said Mr. Salteena in an interested tone.
One can not gamble on anything really said Procurio returning to the hot water pipes though of course I know a lot more than most peaple about the inmates here.
What are the habbits of the Earl of Clincham said Mr. Salteena.
Procurio gave a smile many and varius he replied I cant say much in my position but one lives and learns. He heaved a sigh and shruged his shoulders.
Well good day said Mr. Salteena feeling better for the chat.
Procurio nodded in silence as Mr. Salteena trotted off down the passage. At last he came to a door labelled Clincham Earl of in big letters. With a beating heart Mr. Salteena pulled the bell and the door swung open of its own accord. At the same moment a cheery voice rang out from the distance. Come in please I am in the study first door on left.
With a nervous bound Mr. Salteena obeyd these directions and found himself in a small but handsome compartment done in dark green lether with crests on the chairs. Over the mantlepiece was hung the painting of a lady in a low neck looking quite the thing. By the desk was seated a tall man of 35 with very nice eyes of a twinkly nature and curly hair he wore a quite plain suit of palest grey but well made and on the table reposed a grey top hat which had evidently been on his head recently. He had a rose in his button hole also a signet ring.
Hullo said this pleasant fellow as Mr. Salteena was spell bound on mat.
Hullo your Lord Ship responded our hero bowing low and dropping his top hat do I adress the Earl of Clincham.
You do said the Earl with a homely smile and who do I adress eh.
Our hero bowed again Alfred Salteena he said in deep tones.
Oh I see said the kindly earl well come in my man and tell me who you are.
Mr. Salteena seated himself gingerly on the edge of a crested chair.
To tell you the truth my Lord I am not anyone of import and I am not a gentleman as they say he ended getting very red and hot.
Have some whiskey said lord Clincham and he poured the liquid into a glass at his elbow. Mr. Salteena lapped it up thankfully.
Well my man said the good natured earl what I say is what dose it matter we cant all be of the Blood royal can we.
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