The Serpent's Skin by Erina Reddan (top 5 books to read .txt) 📕

haven’t said a word to you about Mum’s disappearance for fourteen years.’

‘The bullshit. You never had to say anything, JJ. Your snarky face was always saying it for you.’

I picked up the plate and threw it across the room, smashing it against the fireplace, showering the kitchen with bits of cheap china. The shock of it rushed me out of the house. It was Blue who found her way into my arms, brushing up against the thing that needed to be brushed up against. I pushed my face into the long, tough hair on her neck. Counted down from ten, over and over, and Blue stood there counting with me.

The dark had taken over the sky, layering it now in a thick threat. A flash of lightning split it in two. I went back inside and ignored Dad, who hadn’t moved an inch. I went to the fridge and pulled out three sausages. I took them out to Blue and patted her as she wolfed them down. Went back inside.

‘Hey, they’re for my lunch tomorra.’

‘Not any more.’

‘What the hell?’

‘Blue was hungry.’

‘She’s a working dog.’

‘Everyone needs love, Dad.’

I sat down opposite him again. ‘You got Aunty Peg pregnant.’

‘The bullshit out of your mouth.’

‘Mum’s watching everything you do. Same with God. You’re down here burning through your heaven points right under their eyes, right now.’

‘I’m dead weary, JJ. Just give it a bone.’

‘You were tired out years ago from all your lies. Admit it. You and Aunty Peggy. Under Mum’s nose.’

‘Leave it alone.’

‘Where did Mum get to after she’d had it out with Aunty Peg? You know as well as I do that she didn’t stay there.’

‘You worry a snake’s nest long enough, one of them bastards is going to rise up and bite you.’

‘That’s the plan.’

‘I don’t know. All right.’ His fist slammed into the table. ‘I don’t know where your mother went.’

‘You do because she rang you.’

‘I made all that up. Why do you think she never spoke to you buggers? Because she didn’t ring. I made it up. That’s the lie. And I can’t be sorry about it. I didn’t want you blokes hurting.’

For a moment I believed him and the anti-climax of it was all cold water. But then I saw a shift in his eyes as they paused on Mum’s photo again and then headed back out the window and over the paddock he couldn’t see in the night.

‘Did she have a friend in Richmond?’

His hand stopped tapping.

‘How would she know anybody in Richmond?’

‘The address in her prayer book.’

He stood up abruptly. ‘You go there?’

I nodded.

He spread his legs, hands to waist. ‘And?’

I couldn’t work an ‘and’ off my tongue.

He leaned over to steady himself on the back of the chair. ‘I been there, too. The day after the police came, told us your mother was gone. I went to that address. Said they never heard of her.’

‘Who did? Who lived there back then?’

‘Some doctor bloke.’ He rubbed his hand against his thigh. ‘I believed im. That doctor, he looked steady.’

‘There were two girls there this morning. Slammed the door in my face, actually.’ I said. I didn’t add any of their other weirdness.

He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. ‘Righto, then,’ he said softly. ‘End of the line.’

‘It can’t be.’ I balled my fist. ‘There has to be something else, Dad.’

‘Who says so?’ He stared at me. ‘Just because a thing is hard to live with doesn’t turn it into a crime.’

‘What did you fight about the night she left?’

‘How can I bloody remember?’

‘Really?’

A snakey look passed over his face. ‘Peg, then. I probably told her about Peg.’

‘So you’re admitting it. You had sex with Peg.’

He looked cornered.

I didn’t breathe.

‘Okay. Okay. The answer is yes.’ He held his hands up in surrender. ‘It was just the once. Years before. When your mother was pregnant with Philly. Sarah was tired and sick and scared and miserable with being pregnant again. And it was all my fault she was. I was the man. And I just…’ He shook his hands in agitation. ‘Just. Just couldn’t take it any more. And Peg…’ He petered out.

‘And the pregnancy?’

‘I don’t know nothin about any pregnancy.’ He flicked it away. His eyes flashing between me and the past. ‘I felt that bad about it. All those years. I had to finally tell Sarah. So I did that night.’

‘Stop lying,’ I yelled. ‘It was Mrs Nolan who told her about you and Peg. By mistake, the next morning.’

Defeat greyed across his face.

I let him sit with it for a while. But then I didn’t. ‘But Mum was already leaving you, anyway. Why?’

He held every muscle tight, like an animal in a spotlight.

‘Forgot to feed Max,’ he got out at last.

‘Don’t be stupid. It’s pitch black, and it’s starting to pelt down. Leave him to the morning.’

He stopped still on his way to the door. Turned to point a stubby finger at me. ‘When I get back, you be gone.’

‘It’s going to come out, Dad. It will.’

The first thunderclap came loud and I jumped. Lightning cracked across the sky outside the window.

He got to the door and leaned on it, saying nothing. The air between us thickened until I could bear the tension no longer. But I did.

‘You’re right,’ he burst out. ‘Okay! I’m a hypocrite and a liar and all the things you’ve ever thought I was. She knew it. She knew it, too. That’s what we fought about that night. She told me she was leaving because she’d had enough of me.’

I stared at him. This was the tawdry nothing it had come down to. All the puff went out of me.

‘I didn’t believe her. It wasn’t the first time we’d blued,’ he said. ‘I could have worked on her the next morning. Settled her down. Just like always. But then bloody Nosy Nancy told her about Peg, and she left before I could explain.’ His voice went up like he was the victim. ‘Tell her how sorry I