He Who Gets Slapped by Leonid Andreyev (children's ebooks free online .TXT) 📕
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A mysterious gentleman arrives at Papa Briquet’s circus, and applies to be a clown; unable to do a backflip, and with the circus unwilling to accept the idea of political discourse among the clowns, they settle together on the role of He Who Gets Slapped. Unfortunately for the troupe, He has motives for joining that aren’t immediately apparent; motives that start to threaten the integrity of the circus.
He Who Gets Slapped was first presented in Moscow in 1915 to enthusiastic audiences, although critics at the time were confused about Leonid Andreyev’s subtexts. It is his most famous play, at least partially due to the later release in 1924 of a film adaptation by the newly-formed MGM Studios.
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- Author: Leonid Andreyev
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nearer. Yes. It was too much like literature. This is not an academy. You forget yourself, He.
Tilly
But to shut one’s mouth—faugh. …
Briquet
In a didactic tone. Whenever one shuts one’s mouth, it is always high time to shut it, unless one is drinking. Hey, whiskey and soda!
Voices
Whiskey and soda for the Manager!
Mancini
But this is obscurantism. Philosophizing again, Briquet?
Briquet
I am not satisfied with you today, He. Why do you tease them? They don’t like it. Your health! A good slap must be clean like a crystal—fft-fft! right side, left side, and done with it. They will like it; they will laugh, and love you. But in your slaps there is a certain bite, you understand, a certain smell—
He
But they laughed, nevertheless!
Briquet
But without pleasure, without pleasure, He. You pay, and immediately draw a draft on their bank; it’s not the right game—they won’t like you.
Jackson
That’s what I tell him. He had already begun to make them angry.
Bezano
Entering. Consuelo, where are you? I have been looking for you—come on. Both go out. The Baron, after hesitating a while, follows them.Mancini accompanies him respectfully to the door.
He
Sighs. You don’t understand, my dear friends; you are simply old, and have forgotten the smell of the stage.
Jackson
Aha! Who is old, my young man?
He
Don’t be angry, Jim. It’s a play, don’t you understand? I become happy when I enter the ring and hear the music. I wear a mask and I feel humorous. There is a mask on my face, and I play. I may say anything like a drunkard. Do you understand? Yesterday when I, with this stupid face, was playing the great man, the philosopher he assumes a proud monumental pose, and repeats the gesture of the play—general laughter I was walking this way, and was telling how great, how wise, how incomparable I was—how God lived in me, how high I stood above the earth—how glory shone above my head his voice changes and he is speaking faster then you, Jim, you hit me for the first time. And I asked you, “What is it, they’re applauding me?” Then, at the tenth slap, I said: “It seems to me that they sent for me from the Academy?” Acts, looking around him with an air of unconquerable pride and splendour. Laughter. Jackson gives him a real slap.
He
Holding his face. Why?
Jackson
Because you’re a fool, and play for nothing. Waiter, the check. Laughter. The bell calls them to the ring. The actors go out in haste, some running. The waiters collect their money.
Briquet
In a singsong. To the ring—to the ring—
Mancini
I want to tell you something, He. You are not going yet?
He
No. I’ll take a rest.
Briquet
To the ring—to the ring—
The clowns as they go sing in shrill, squeaky voices. Little by little they all disappear, and loud music begins. He seats himself on the sofa with his legs crossed, and yawns.
Mancini
He, you have something none of my ancestors ever had—money. Let’s have a nice bottle on you. Waiter, please—The waiter who was taking up dishes, brings a bottle of wine and glasses and goes out.
He
You’re blue, Mancini. Stretches. Well, at my age, a hundred slaps—it seems pretty hard. So you’re blue. How are things getting on with your girl?
Mancini
Tss! Bad! Complications—parents—shudders Agh—
He
Prison!
Mancini
Laughing. Prison! Mustn’t I uphold the glory of my name now, eh? He, I’m joking—but there is Hell in my heart. You’re the only one who understands me. But tell me how to explain this passion? It will turn my hair grey, it’ll bring me to prison, to the grave. I am a tragic man. He—Wipes his eyes with a dirty handkerchief. Why don’t I like things which are not forbidden? Why, at all moments, even at the very moment of ecstasy, must I be reminded of some law—it is stupid. He, I am becoming an anarchist. Good God!—Count Mancini, an anarchist. That’s the only thing I’ve missed.
He
Isn’t there a way of settling it somehow?
Mancini
Is there a way of getting money, somehow?
He
And the Baron?
Mancini
Oh, yes! He’s just waiting for it, the bloodsucker! He’ll get what he’s after. Some day, you’ll see me give him Consuelo for ten thousand francs, perhaps for five!
He
Cheap.
Mancini
Did I say it was anything else? Do I want to do it? But these bourgeois are strangling me, they’ve got me by the throat. He, one can easily see that you’re a gentleman, and of good society, you understand me—I showed you the jewels which I sent back to him—damn honesty—I didn’t even dare change the stones, put false ones—
He
Why?
Mancini
It would have queered the game. Do you think he didn’t weigh the diamonds when he got them back?
He
He will not marry her.
Mancini
Yes he will. You don’t understand. Laughs. The first half of his life, this man had only appetites—now love’s got him. If he does not get Consuelo, he is lost, he is—like a withered narcissus. Plague take him with his automobiles. Did you see his car?
He
I did. … Give Consuelo to the Jockey—
Mancini
To Bezano? Laughs. What nonsense you do talk! Oh, I know. It’s your joke about Adam and Eve. But please stop it. It’s clever, but it compromises the child. She told me about it.
He
Or give her to me.
Mancini
Have you a billion? Laughs. Ah, He, I’m not in the proper mood to listen to your clownish jokes—They say there are terrible jails in this country, and no discriminations are being made between people of my kind, and plain scoundrels. Why do you look at me like that? You’re making fun of me?
He
No.
Mancini
I’ll never get accustomed to those faces. You’re so disgustingly made up.
He
He will not marry her. You can be as proud as you please, Mancini, but he’ll not marry her. What is Consuelo? She
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