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84, 216

Ackerman, Diane, 327

Ackerman, Jennifer, 72

acupuncture, 118–21

AJ’s results from, 120–21

doing nothing compared with, 121

energy pathways in, 120, 121

mummified Siberan corpse found with markings of, 119

adrenal gland, 139–64, 140

see also stress

adrenaline, high, noise-related, 55

adult baby food, 127

aerobic (cardio) exercise, 348

brainpower boosted by, 174–75

for eyes, 329

for Finger Fitness, 305–7, 309

in guerrilla exercise, 353–54

longevity linked to, 44–45

schedule for, 33

slow fitness vs., 158–61

aerobic running, 252–53

Aeron chair, butt’s soul mate as, 63

Aesop’s Fables, hare maligned in, 252

age, aging, 343

of brain, 175

hearing loss in, 55

of lungs, 219

old, 44–45, 267

prolonged, futility of pursuing fitness for, 31

skin as broadcaster of, 236

slowed down by volunteering, 179–80

successful, 24–26

age denialism, 125–26

Ahasuerus, King, 199

Ah-Choo! (Ackerman), 72

Airborne, evaporation of faith in, 124

Airlift to America (Shachtman), 179

air pollution, 219–20

air quality, house plants for, 28

air travel:

face mask worn in, 79–80

fastidious germaphobic kid in, 81

magical thinking essential to, 148

alarmist babble, secondhand smoke dismissed as, 184

alcohol:

daily limit of, 14, 89

reviewing benefits of, 14, 89, 91

see also booze; wine

alienation, manual incompetence blamed for, 305

Alison (Julie’s friend), 161–62

Alison (sleep clinic technician), 263

Allen, Woody:

Execusiser of, 67

nature avoided by, 43

almond milk, AJ’s affection for, 271

almond scent, as AJ’s sedative of choice, 299, 347

alpha females, scarcity of, 42

alpha males, in caveman movement, 36–44

Alterna Health scent, 118

β€œAlways Look on the Bright Side of Life” (song), 152–53

Alzheimer’s disease, 15, 175

American Academy of Dermatology, 240

American Cancer Society, 190, 236

American Council on Science and Health (ACSH), 187–88

American Dental Association, 197

American Lung Association, 220

American Nazi Party, how AJ was aided in kicking his mango habit by, 231–32

American Nerd (Nugent), 174

American Society of Colon and Rectal Surgeons, 135

amygdala, cursing as activator of, 125

anesthesia, 115–16

animal products, Marti’s passionate battle against, 93–94

antibacterial soaps, 79, 184, 369

antibiotics, germ resistance to, 79

AntiGravity yoga, 247

antinoise movement, 54–57

achievements of, 56–57

how it fared on the kookiness scale, 56

see also noise

antioxidants, 89

in blueberries, 60, 97

dark chocolate loaded with, 14

overestimation of, 97

unhealthy food in clothing of, 95

anxiety:

mindfulness as bringer of, 27

mutual outsourcing of, 149–50

vs. optimism in health matters, 70–71

in petting Logan the Airedale, 151

when magical thinking can help, 148–50

aphrodisiacs, 105–7

Good & Plenty/cucumber romance spray, 102, 106–7, 109

β€œnatural,” 107–8

scientific skepticism about, 107

apple juice, AJ vs. Julie on where to put it, 170

apples, 17, 135, 356

as β€œClark Kent” food, 97

appliance safety, 338

Appy, Meri-K, 337–39

accident-prevention philosophy of, 337

Jacobs apartment scanned by, 337–39

Archer, Krista, 208–10

Areca palm, 2, 28

aromatherapy, 294, 299

arsenic, 273

asthma, 220, 241

athletes, infectious diseases of, 32

athlete’s foot, 32

Atkins diet, 17, 227

Atlantic, 287

attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), 177

Aveeno lotion, 237

Averbukh, Vlad, 37–43

bathroom squatting practiced by, 136

on caveman diet, 40–41

cavewoman dates attempted by, 41

fantasies on how AJ’s new chest would cause regrets in, 83–84

as fundamentalist caveman, 38

ill-advised complaints of, 41–43

raw meat fare of, 38, 228

red hair, beard, and smart car of, 37

unintended insults of, 38–39, 40

Averill, Meredith, 19, 20

Axel, Richard, 298

Aykroyd, Dan, 345

babies, helmets for, 336

Bach, J. S., 77

back, 313–24, 314

lengthening of, 317

back pain, 313–19

exacerbated by bad posture, 315

tips for relief of, 318

bacteria:

bad PR of, 77

cuticles as defense against, 210

nasal filtration of, 216

see also germs

bad for you:

antibacterial soap, 184

Balkanizing life, 64

boxing, 328

brick wall view, 44

carbs, 227–29

car upholstery, 186

cell phones, 7

CFL light bulbs, 185–86

chairs, 63–64, 66

cigarettes, 214–15

cleaning fluids, 184

commercial flowers, 186

deadlines (stressful), 139

distracted eating, 21–22

driving or walking drunk, 341

eating high on the food chain, 190

foods developed in last ten thousand years, 228

germ porn, 76

germ-saturated gyms, 32

glassblowing, 328

hang gliding and skiing, 89

health food fetishism, 87–90

heavy drinking, 14

hypercleanliness, 80–81

lack of focus, 309

large doses, 188

metal fillings, 186

microwaving food in plastic, 190

multitasking, 68

noise, 53–59

not being in the moment, 68

obese or unhappy friends, 161–62

plastic containers failing BPA verse test, 189, 369

plastic toys, 183

processed and starchy carbs, 93

repetitive actions, 170

sex, 101–3

see also sexaphobes

sex without orgasm, 103

shampoo, 183

sitting and staring at screens all day, 63

six-pack abs, 216

sleeping with pets, 152

smoking unfiltered menthols while eating cheese-coated lard and screaming at your spouse, 63

sneakers, 205

snoring, 259–64

some marriages, 46–47

stooping posture, 313–14

sugar or thinking about sugar, 15, 93, 95, 96, 229–30

a too-real worldview, 130

touch screens, 309

turmeric, 7

unbalanced delusional optimism, 130

UV light, 196–97

waving things about, 309

wires, 185

worries and care, 149

writing books, 139

see also good for you

Bad Science (Goldacre), 90, 237

baldness, testosterone blamed for, 284, 287

bananas, 93

Bananas (film), 67

Band-Aid Removal Preference Dilemma, 252–53

Barefoot Run, first annual, 203–8

barefoot running:

Dr. Archer, the foot doctor’s views on, 208–9

passerby remarks on, 207

baseball players, improving eyesight of, 330

baseball watching, blood pressure improved by, 1, 164, 347

basketball teams, above-average students not found on, 175–76

Bassols, Claudia, 285

bathroom:

happy and timely visits to, 131

two years in, 64

see also toilet topics

bathroom safety, 338

bathtubs, slip-resistant decals and grab bars for, 338, 339

beauty treatments, year-long, in Book of Esther, 236

bedroom, chilly temperature urged for, 210

beds:

fatalities occurring while in or near, 335–36

leaving them unmade, 330

bedtime, 265–66

Beilock, Sian, 164

Belkin, Lisa, 341

Bella (worry exchanger), 149–50

Benihana, noisy ambience of, 53–54

beta-carotene supplements, lung cancer increased with, 90

Bible, AJ’s obedience to the arcane rules of, 5–6

biceps curls, phone hookup for, 67

bingeing:

on Chips Ahoy!, 66

nutritional, 59–60

Plato on, 293–94

why exercise can lead to, 32–33

bioflavonoids, 106

bird excrement, price of skin treatment with, 235

birth, biblical injunction on pain in, 116

birthday song, handwashing to, 78

bladder cancer, 16, 89, 275

Blaine, David, 216–17

breath-holding record set by, 216

morning juice recipe of, 216

Blomberg, Les, 365–66

Blood pressure:

effect of a park stroll on, 44

petting dogs and, 150

raised by watching football, lowered by baseball, 1, 164, 347

TSA pat-down possibly beneficial for, 154

blood sugar, 230, 363

Blood-type diet, 13

blueberries, 60

marketing efforts behind obsession with, 97

with savoring meditation, 20–21, 86

worthwhile time spent on, 26

BluePrintCleanse, 268, 269, 271, 272

Blue Zones, The (Buettner), 64, 71

Bodies exhibit, 213–14

body:

asking for a refund on, 116

channels or meridians of, 120

excruciating mindfulness of, 27

incomprehensible betrayal by, 72

losing some marshmallowness of, 181

as 1978 Ford Pinto, 15

seeking signs of progress in, 83–84

some parts left out of project, 346

see also specific body parts

boils, 32

Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex (Roach), 103, 104

Bono, F-word demonstrated by, 125

boobs, male, cause of, 183, 283

books, nonelectronic, good news for, 266

booze:

marriage vs., 47

in Vice Diet, 13–16, 330

see also alcohol; drinking; wine

Borgnine, Ernest, secret of longevity as told by, 103–4

Born to Run (McDougall), 47–48, 203, 205

Bose noise-canceling headphones, 52, 57–58, 59, 340, 366

Bottlemania (Royte), 273

bowel cancer, 92

boys, quelling hormonal hyperactivity in, 101–3

brain, 165–71, 166

a bit full of itself, 307

effect of holding hands on, 308

effect of repetition on, 170

emotions entangled with olfactory part of, 298

exercising of, 165–67

fog in, 19

as hand’s handservant, 305

how noise

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