PENALTY by Annika Sturm (best contemporary novels TXT) 📕

I said. I'm sorry.' Alex wanted to hug and kiss him. 'You have every right to be angry with me.' He said quietly and Tom could see tears welling up in his eyes. 'I don't know why you can't tell me anything but I just hope whatever it is, it will go away?', he looked at him. Alex nodded and cast his eyes down, 'because it's killing you, everyone can see it.' Tom very carefully approached him slowly and gently stroked his hair. His friend's presence felt so good that when he tried to hug him, Alex threw himself into his arms. 'Alex,' Tom held him closely, 'I so wish I could help you,' he kissed his cheek. When they heard a door slam somewhere in the corridor, Alex jumped and stepped away from his friend. They both took deep breaths, 'do you think Felix can help you at least?' Tom asked worried. 'Oh he's been great actually,' Alex nodded, 'thank you for getting him involved. You did the right thing.' Tom smiled. 'At least one thing I could do then.' 'You have done a lot more than that. You're still not giving up on me.' Alex briefly kissed his cheek. Then he walked away quickly.

The team doctors examined Alex's cut hand but were pleased with the way it had been treated in the first place. They were more worried about Alex's general state, his tiredness and the fact he clearly hadn't eaten properly all day. To Alex's frustration they did some additional tests on him, which took longer than he had planned for in this visit. In the end the doctors let him go, warning him to catch up on sleep and eat properly that evening. 'No chance.' Alex thought to himself and headed towards Markus' room.

Before he knocked on the door he made sure his phone was set to record and decided to just keep holding it in his hand to ensure the conversation was going to be recorded as clearly as possible. Alex felt nervous again and was sweating with stress. He took a deep breath and encouraged himself to get on with it. 'Just don't punch him.' He kept telling himself as he knocked.

It took a moment before Markus opened the door and stared at him. 'Alex? That's a surprise.' 'Can I come in?' Alex asked coldly. Markus hesitated, unsure how to best react. Alex kept staring at him. Markus walked away and left the door open so Alex could follow him into the room. 'So what can I do for you?' Markus asked as he switched off the television. 'I want you to end this nightmare you put me into last night.' Markus turned to him. 'Calling someone?' He asked nodding at Alex's mobile in his hand. Alex got nervous but played cool and threw it onto the bed. 'What happened to your hand?' Markus asked. Alex laughed. 'As if you give a shit about that.' 'Just making conversation.'

Alex took a deep breath. 'Why are you doing this to us?' 'Us?' Markus walked towards him. 'Yes, Tommy and me.' 'Did you not finish it then?' Alex gulped. 'Don't worry,' he laughed exhaustedly, 'Tommy will do that for me if this continues.' 'So did you tell him?' Markus asked and there was something threatening about him again. Alex was being brave. 'That you are blackmailing me?' He hissed at him. 'Oh, I don't like that word'. 'You might not like the word but that's exactly what you are doing,' he paused, 'I thought you told me I couldn't. 'Well. You could of course,' Markus said and started playing with the television control in his hand, 'only then the whole world will know too.' Alex could feel tears of anger in his eyes again. He tried to concentrate on his satisfaction that he had the proof he needed already.

He decided to push him further. 'Markus, why are you doing this?', Alex shook his head in disbelief, 'what do you get out of it? Other than watch other people suffer. Is it a power thing? Is that what it is?', he took a deep breath, 'look, if you wanted to teach us a lesson and somehow penalise me or make me feel like shit then let me tell you that you have succeeded. Now can we please put this behind us. I can't...,' he had to gasp for air, 'I can't bear this any longer.' Markus frowned. 'Can't bear what? Not cuddling up to Tommy? Like a girl? You're pathetic Alex,' Markus crossed his arms in front of his chest, 'how does he like it best, hey?', he whispered, 'do you go down on him? Does he like fucking you or is it the other way round?'

Alex started breathing harder and his hand turned into a fist. He desperately tried to control himself. 'How dare you talk about him like that!' He spat through his teeth. Markus didn't react. 'You should both be ashamed of yourselves. Cheating on your girlfriends with each other.' Alex laughed. 'Oh and you are a saint are you? All this is none of your fucking business,’ he shouted angrily, 'you simply can't stand the thought of two men together, can you? If we both went off having sex with different girls every night you wouldn't give a shit because that would just be 'normal', wouldn't it?', he shook his head, 'you have no idea.' Alex said exhaustedly.

Markus walked to the window and looked outside. He took a deep breath. 'What you and Tommy are doing, Alex, is sick. And as I said to you yesterday, I won't allow it to happen in this team. I'm only trying to protect you both from making a terrible mistake, trying to get you to see how wrong this is,' he turned and looked at him expectantly, 'but if you love each other so much surely you can tell the world anyway.' Alex sat down on the bed. 'Unfortunately too many people in this world still think like you. If we had the slightest chance,' he shook his head sadly, 'we would be together. Openly.' Markus sat down next to him and looked at him intently. 'Then make the right decision if you have no chance anyway. Finish it.' He said almost gently. Alex stared at him in disbelief. 'But I love him,' he whispered, 'can you not see what you are doing to us?' He cried. 'I'm doing the right thing by getting you to decide,' Markus said factually, 'I'd take the opportunity if I were you.' Alex gave him a look. He stood up to take his phone off the bed and walked to the door. He turned to Markus one last time. 'So you are not going to take back your threat? You will still tell the press if Tommy and I stay together or if I tell him what a homophobic piece of shit you are?' He pointed his phone towards Markus, whose face had turned red with anger. 'You'd give me no other option.' He said as calmly as possible. Alex smiled inwardly, opened the door and left the room.

He had to stop in the corridor for a moment to get his breath back after he had slammed Markus' door shut behind him. He gasped for air and clutched his phone in his hand as he rested his head against the wall.
He quickly checked the recording worked and punched his fist in the air when he could hear their conversation re-playing. He ran straight to Felix's room and knocked on the door.

Felix opened quickly. He hurried him in and shut the door. 'God Alex, it's nearly dinner time why did this take so long?', he held his head, 'did you get it?', Alex nodded and smiled. Felix could tell he was disturbed and hugged him, 'well done. That's brilliant, let's have a listen.' They played the recording. Alex sat on the bed staring ahead vacantly and Felix looked at him whenever Markus sounded particularly offensive.

'You did it,' Felix cheered and hugged him again, 'good work. Winter will sack him on the spot. What a bastard,' he nodded at him encouragingly. Alex tried to smile, 'are you okay?' Felix said placing his arm around him. 'I feel exhausted.' He held his head and rubbed his forehead in despair. 'Hey,' Felix patted his back, 'you're nearly there. We have such good leverage now, Winter will help us,' he smiled at him, 'and who knows, Tommy could be back with you before you know it.' He winked at him and Alex laughed tiredly.

The boys had run out of time to see Winter before dinner but agreed to approach him straight afterwards. Felix said he'd give him a heads up that they urgently needed to talk to him. He offered to go with Alex into Winter's office, which Alex gratefully accepted. He was dreading it all but knew it was his only hope of stopping Markus if he didn't want to lose Tom.

The boys just about made it to dinner on time. Alex's eyes were looking for Tom in the dining room. He could see him chatting with Kai again and he felt like his stomach was going to turn. Tom stared at his friend as he sat down at his table. He smiled shyly and Alex smiled back at him, wishing he had already spoken to Winter and that their relationship was back to how it was only 24 hours ago.

He chatted to his team mates during dinner. They could tell he hadn't been his usual confident self all day. Alex tried to joke and shrug it off. The boys were pleased to see that at least he had some appetite again that night and finished his food. Felix was sitting at another table across from him. Once they had dessert, he walked over to Alex's table. 'Alright?', he greeted the boys and bent down to Alex, 'Winter said it's absolutely fine to see him after dinner so I would say we'll go in about 10 minutes,' he whispered in his ear. Alex felt nervous again and looked at him. Felix put one hand firmly on his shoulder, ‘it'll be okay.' He nodded and walked back to his table. Alex tried to distract himself by listening back into his team mates' conversation.

All of a sudden he could feel a hand on his shoulder again and then hear a nasty voice whispering into his ear before he could even turn to see who it was. 'Are you fucking Felix as well now?', Alex took deep breaths but he could feel the anger rise in him again. He stared ahead breathing hard, 'looks like Tommy found himself a new friend already. Soon he won't need you at all anymore.' It was too much. Alex couldn't keep his anger under control anymore and finally snapped.

'Leave me alone!' He jumped up and punched Markus' face. He could hear his team mates shout out in shock and even single out Tom's voice from across the room. Markus stumbled backwards against another table. His lip was bleeding but he had a satisfied grin on his face. Alex stared at him confused and was breathing hard. Then Tom was by his side. He grabbed his shoulders and pulled him back. 'Alex, what the hell are you doing? Are you crazy?' He shouted in anger and worry. Alex somehow felt relieved after that punch. His hand throbbed in pain and he was worried for a moment that he had now fully broken it. Markus got up and walked away triumphantly. Alex could hear everyone mumble in shock. Felix came over and stroked his back. 'Oh Alex,' he said, 'I wish you hadn't done that.'

'Alexander Hanisch!', Winter's voice was sharp and loud, 'into my office. Immediately!' Alex looked at Tom whose face was full of concern. 'I'm sorry.' Alex whispered. He got up slowly and followed Winter, hanging