PENALTY by Annika Sturm (best contemporary novels TXT) π
Excerpt from the book:
This is the story of two boys, two friends, two professional footballers. One day they discover they have feelings for each other that go beyond just friendship. Suddenly the boys find themselves having to make difficult decisions with life changing consequences. Together they embark on a tough journey against prejudice and discrimination. Can their affection for each other survive in the world of football?
This book is a work of fiction and, except in the case of geographic facts and references of football teams and tournaments, any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental
This book is a work of fiction and, except in the case of geographic facts and references of football teams and tournaments, any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental
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his head with everyone staring at him in silence. But Felix walked by his side and had one arm around his shoulders. 'Okay, well, we were going to talk to him anyway, hey?' Felix patted his back. 'I'm coming with you!', Tom shouted and Alex and Felix both turned and saw Tom run towards them. Alex smiled sadly. Tom also put his arm around him. Alex looked at him unsure, 'I'm coming with you.' Tom insisted and the three boys headed towards Winter's office.
Their manager had gone ahead and sat in his chair facing the door. He looked surprised at the three boys walking in together. 'I need to speak to Alex and I understand, Felix, you and him wanted to talk to me anyway. Tom, I'm not sure you are adding any value here.' He said factually. 'Please, can I stay? I think I need to hear this.' Tom said quietly. Felix looked at Winter. 'I have no problem with Tom being here. In fact I think it would be helpful.' Winter hesitated a moment and then nodded briefly.
Alex felt sick again. He took a chair and sat down in front of his coach. Felix and Tom stood either side behind him. Alex took a deep breath and looked at Winter. His manager's face was serious and Alex just wanted to disappear into thin air. There was a moment of silence, then Winter addressed him.
'Alex, I have watched you with great concern over the last day. This is why I approached you this afternoon. Now you have just punched your team captain straight in the face! I will make sure you will be punished for this sort of behaviour, trust me,' Alex cast his eyes down. He was kicking himself for having angered Winter when he so desperately needed his support at this very moment. Then Winter's voice turned a little gentler, 'Alex, look at me,' Alex looked up at his manager and Winter could see tears in his eyes, 'what is going on? You are not your normal self,β he paused, 'you have a choice here. You either tell me now and I will try and help you or you don't, in which case I will simply consider the level of punishment you will receive for the assault on Markus. It's your choice.' Winter looked him straight in the eye. 'Tell him Alex,' Felix said, 'you have to tell him.' He put his hand on Alex's shoulder encouraging him.
Alex took a deep breath. 'Markus has threatened me,' he was trying to get his words out but found it hard to express himself. He tried again looking down at his hands, 'he threatened to leak some intimate, private information to the press if I don't play by his rules.' Winter frowned at him and looked concerned. 'What sort of information? About you?' Alex nodded. He took another deep breath. 'And Tom.' He added quietly. He could feel Tom's eyes staring at his back and prayed he would forgive him for what he was about to tell Winter about their relationship.
Tom took another chair and sat down next to Alex. He stared at him in shock. 'Alex, what sort of information?' Winter asked again. The two boys looked at each other for a long moment. Then Tom nodded at Alex. It was hardly noticeable but Alex understood. He turned back to Winter. 'Tom and I are in a relationship,' he paused, 'Markus found out about us and threatened me to tell the press if I don't end it or if I tell Tom anything about his threat,' he looked back at his friend, 'I'm sorry Tommy.' He whispered. 'My God,' Tom was still staring at him but took his injured hand and gently stroked it, 'now it all makes sense.' He said quietly.
Winter coughed for attention. The boys looked at him. 'Alex, when was this? When did he threaten you?' 'After dinner last night. He talked to everyone but left me to last so by the time he could have his little chat everyone had already left.' 'Is this why you punched him?' Winter asked him. Alex hesitated. 'He just wouldn't leave me alone. He kept saying things to provoke me. About Tom. About Felix even,' he shook his head, 'I just snapped. And that's exactly what he was waiting for as well.' Tom was still stroking his hand. 'And what happened to your hand? Did he do this to you?' Winter asked with concern. 'Oh,' Alex shook his head, 'no, that was me. It was anger management I guess.' He smiled embarrassed.
'How did he know?' This time it was Tom who posed the question. Alex's face turned sad. He held Tom's hand. 'That's the worst thing,' he gulped, 'it's all my fault. Someone saw us in the changing rooms after the match,' Alex rubbed his forehead in frustration, 'when I kissed you,' he whispered quietly, conscious of Winter staring at them, 'if I had been more careful, none of this would have happened.' 'Who saw you?' Winter asked. Alex shook his head. 'That I don't know. He never told me.' Tom smiled at him gently. Winter cleared his voice. 'Alex, you do realise that even if I confronted him it would be your word against his'. He would never admit any wrongdoing and, unfortunately, according to what you have just told me, this would mean that he would tell the press about your relationship because you have just broken his rules.' Winter sounded stressed.
Felix smiled. 'Yeah. We thought about that one.' Tom frowned at him. 'You knew about this?' Felix nodded. 'Alex told me last night. We couldn't fill you in and take the risk Markus runs off to his mates from the press Tommy. Everything had to look like Alex was doing as he was told until we had a plan.' 'And what was that plan?' Winter and Tom said in one voice. Alex took his phone out of his pocket and placed it on Winter's desk. 'I confronted him again this afternoon. And recorded our conversation,' he paused, 'your proof is right here.' Winter stared at him. 'Clever.' He said. Alex smiled. 'It was Felix's idea,' he turned to Tom, 'you might not want to listen to this,' he stroked his hand, 'it's pretty hurtful.' Tom shook his head. 'I don't care. You had to listen to it, didn't you?' 'Tommy.' Alex gave him a look. 'I'm not leaving.' Tom said assertively. Alex sighed and started playing the recording.
For a moment no-one spoke a word. Then Winter turned to the boys and his face was serious. 'Felix, please will you find Markus and tell him to come to my office immediately.' 'Yes, sure.' Felix jumped up and left the room. 'Alex, Tom,' Winter looked at the two of them, 'first of all I would like to thank you for your trust. I'm sure this has not been easy for you. Let me reassure you that you do not have to worry about your relationship as far as this team is concerned. I reject any homophobic feelings as part of this team that I head up. Markus will be penalised for his behaviour and for verbally threatening you like he did,' he paused, 'I do feel that you are not being honest with your partners and I have my concerns about that, but I also believe this is something you both need to discuss and decide for yourselves,' he smiled at them gently, 'you have both clearly suffered emotionally in the last day. And I'm sorry you had to go through this.' Alex felt relieved. 'Thank you sir.' He had to gasp for air again. Tom nodded. 'Yes, thank you for your support. This means a lot to us.' Alex's heart jumped at Tom's words.
'Boys, I will of course confront Markus and try and convince him to not go to the press. But ultimately I'm afraid I cannot stop him either if he has made up his mind.' Winter said and looked concerned again.
Alex nodded. 'I know,' he whispered and looked at Tom, 'that was the risk I had to take,' he explained, 'the only other option I had was to end our relationship. And you would have never known why,' Tom squeezed his hand again, 'I just couldn't do that Tommy.' 'I wouldn't have let you anyway, you idiot,' Tom said and smiled despite the fear in his eyes, 'you did the right thing.' He stroked his friend's cheek. Alex gazed at him and enjoyed his touch. He couldn't wait to kiss him again. Whatever was going to happen now, he swore to himself not to miss another second with Tom that evening.
There was a knock and the door opened. Felix and Markus walked into Winter's office and Markus stared at Alex and Tom holding hands. 'Evening sir,' he nodded at Winter, 'well, well who have we got here? Looks like Alex has a softer side too if he doesn't go round punching other people,' he laughed, 'how can I help you sir?' Winter looked at him seriously. 'How is your injury?' He asked him. 'It's a cut lip but the doctors said it could have been worse.' 'I'm glad to hear that. Take a seat.' Winter said and Markus reluctantly sat down next to the boys. Alex could hardly breathe with Markus next to him. Tom could feel him tensing up and looked at Felix for help. 'Why don't we swap for a moment Alex?' Felix patted the back of his head and Alex jumped up with relief. He leant against the wall with his arms crossed in front of his chest taking deep breaths. Felix sat down between Markus and Tom.
'Markus, I have just learnt from these boys that you have aggressively threatened Alex to leak some intimate information about his private life to the press. Blackmail is a very serious offence and I'm finding this rather unnerving to learn that the captain of my team has done such a thing.' Markus was taken aback by the directness of Winter's words. Then he started laughing out loud. 'Oh this is brilliant,' he said chuckling, trying to get his breath back, 'so first Alex punches me in the face and basically attacks me in front of the whole team and then he accuses me of blackmail! This is getting better and better. What's next?', Winter's face was expressionless. Markus looked at him, 'you don't believe this nonsense do you sir? I mean the poor guy clearly lost his mind.'
Tom jumped up, his face was full of anger. Felix took his hand. 'Tommy, sit down,' he pulled him back down next to him and put one arm around his shoulders, 'easy.' He whispered into his ear. Winter gave the boys a look before he turned back to Markus. 'Alex will get punished for attacking you, there is absolutely no doubt about that,' he paused, 'but I'm afraid you threatening one of my players with the press due to his homosexual relationship is absolutely unacceptable.' Markus started to look nervous. 'Homosexual relationship? But this is ridiculous. I have never threatened him with anything. He is the one who attacked me!'
Winter started playing the recording again. Markus stared at his manager in disbelief before he turned to Alex. 'You little piece of shit.' He sounded surprised. And almost impressed. 'Enough!', Winter shouted and stood up, banging his fist on the desk, 'Markus, you have put some of my players through emotional stress. I have trusted you with their wellbeing as their captain and you have abused this position of power beyond belief. I can therefore no longer keep you in the position of captain of this team. I will also consult with the other managers whether we will still invite you as a player to future matches of this team,' he took a deep breath, 'I would also urge you not to leak any information
Their manager had gone ahead and sat in his chair facing the door. He looked surprised at the three boys walking in together. 'I need to speak to Alex and I understand, Felix, you and him wanted to talk to me anyway. Tom, I'm not sure you are adding any value here.' He said factually. 'Please, can I stay? I think I need to hear this.' Tom said quietly. Felix looked at Winter. 'I have no problem with Tom being here. In fact I think it would be helpful.' Winter hesitated a moment and then nodded briefly.
Alex felt sick again. He took a chair and sat down in front of his coach. Felix and Tom stood either side behind him. Alex took a deep breath and looked at Winter. His manager's face was serious and Alex just wanted to disappear into thin air. There was a moment of silence, then Winter addressed him.
'Alex, I have watched you with great concern over the last day. This is why I approached you this afternoon. Now you have just punched your team captain straight in the face! I will make sure you will be punished for this sort of behaviour, trust me,' Alex cast his eyes down. He was kicking himself for having angered Winter when he so desperately needed his support at this very moment. Then Winter's voice turned a little gentler, 'Alex, look at me,' Alex looked up at his manager and Winter could see tears in his eyes, 'what is going on? You are not your normal self,β he paused, 'you have a choice here. You either tell me now and I will try and help you or you don't, in which case I will simply consider the level of punishment you will receive for the assault on Markus. It's your choice.' Winter looked him straight in the eye. 'Tell him Alex,' Felix said, 'you have to tell him.' He put his hand on Alex's shoulder encouraging him.
Alex took a deep breath. 'Markus has threatened me,' he was trying to get his words out but found it hard to express himself. He tried again looking down at his hands, 'he threatened to leak some intimate, private information to the press if I don't play by his rules.' Winter frowned at him and looked concerned. 'What sort of information? About you?' Alex nodded. He took another deep breath. 'And Tom.' He added quietly. He could feel Tom's eyes staring at his back and prayed he would forgive him for what he was about to tell Winter about their relationship.
Tom took another chair and sat down next to Alex. He stared at him in shock. 'Alex, what sort of information?' Winter asked again. The two boys looked at each other for a long moment. Then Tom nodded at Alex. It was hardly noticeable but Alex understood. He turned back to Winter. 'Tom and I are in a relationship,' he paused, 'Markus found out about us and threatened me to tell the press if I don't end it or if I tell Tom anything about his threat,' he looked back at his friend, 'I'm sorry Tommy.' He whispered. 'My God,' Tom was still staring at him but took his injured hand and gently stroked it, 'now it all makes sense.' He said quietly.
Winter coughed for attention. The boys looked at him. 'Alex, when was this? When did he threaten you?' 'After dinner last night. He talked to everyone but left me to last so by the time he could have his little chat everyone had already left.' 'Is this why you punched him?' Winter asked him. Alex hesitated. 'He just wouldn't leave me alone. He kept saying things to provoke me. About Tom. About Felix even,' he shook his head, 'I just snapped. And that's exactly what he was waiting for as well.' Tom was still stroking his hand. 'And what happened to your hand? Did he do this to you?' Winter asked with concern. 'Oh,' Alex shook his head, 'no, that was me. It was anger management I guess.' He smiled embarrassed.
'How did he know?' This time it was Tom who posed the question. Alex's face turned sad. He held Tom's hand. 'That's the worst thing,' he gulped, 'it's all my fault. Someone saw us in the changing rooms after the match,' Alex rubbed his forehead in frustration, 'when I kissed you,' he whispered quietly, conscious of Winter staring at them, 'if I had been more careful, none of this would have happened.' 'Who saw you?' Winter asked. Alex shook his head. 'That I don't know. He never told me.' Tom smiled at him gently. Winter cleared his voice. 'Alex, you do realise that even if I confronted him it would be your word against his'. He would never admit any wrongdoing and, unfortunately, according to what you have just told me, this would mean that he would tell the press about your relationship because you have just broken his rules.' Winter sounded stressed.
Felix smiled. 'Yeah. We thought about that one.' Tom frowned at him. 'You knew about this?' Felix nodded. 'Alex told me last night. We couldn't fill you in and take the risk Markus runs off to his mates from the press Tommy. Everything had to look like Alex was doing as he was told until we had a plan.' 'And what was that plan?' Winter and Tom said in one voice. Alex took his phone out of his pocket and placed it on Winter's desk. 'I confronted him again this afternoon. And recorded our conversation,' he paused, 'your proof is right here.' Winter stared at him. 'Clever.' He said. Alex smiled. 'It was Felix's idea,' he turned to Tom, 'you might not want to listen to this,' he stroked his hand, 'it's pretty hurtful.' Tom shook his head. 'I don't care. You had to listen to it, didn't you?' 'Tommy.' Alex gave him a look. 'I'm not leaving.' Tom said assertively. Alex sighed and started playing the recording.
For a moment no-one spoke a word. Then Winter turned to the boys and his face was serious. 'Felix, please will you find Markus and tell him to come to my office immediately.' 'Yes, sure.' Felix jumped up and left the room. 'Alex, Tom,' Winter looked at the two of them, 'first of all I would like to thank you for your trust. I'm sure this has not been easy for you. Let me reassure you that you do not have to worry about your relationship as far as this team is concerned. I reject any homophobic feelings as part of this team that I head up. Markus will be penalised for his behaviour and for verbally threatening you like he did,' he paused, 'I do feel that you are not being honest with your partners and I have my concerns about that, but I also believe this is something you both need to discuss and decide for yourselves,' he smiled at them gently, 'you have both clearly suffered emotionally in the last day. And I'm sorry you had to go through this.' Alex felt relieved. 'Thank you sir.' He had to gasp for air again. Tom nodded. 'Yes, thank you for your support. This means a lot to us.' Alex's heart jumped at Tom's words.
'Boys, I will of course confront Markus and try and convince him to not go to the press. But ultimately I'm afraid I cannot stop him either if he has made up his mind.' Winter said and looked concerned again.
Alex nodded. 'I know,' he whispered and looked at Tom, 'that was the risk I had to take,' he explained, 'the only other option I had was to end our relationship. And you would have never known why,' Tom squeezed his hand again, 'I just couldn't do that Tommy.' 'I wouldn't have let you anyway, you idiot,' Tom said and smiled despite the fear in his eyes, 'you did the right thing.' He stroked his friend's cheek. Alex gazed at him and enjoyed his touch. He couldn't wait to kiss him again. Whatever was going to happen now, he swore to himself not to miss another second with Tom that evening.
There was a knock and the door opened. Felix and Markus walked into Winter's office and Markus stared at Alex and Tom holding hands. 'Evening sir,' he nodded at Winter, 'well, well who have we got here? Looks like Alex has a softer side too if he doesn't go round punching other people,' he laughed, 'how can I help you sir?' Winter looked at him seriously. 'How is your injury?' He asked him. 'It's a cut lip but the doctors said it could have been worse.' 'I'm glad to hear that. Take a seat.' Winter said and Markus reluctantly sat down next to the boys. Alex could hardly breathe with Markus next to him. Tom could feel him tensing up and looked at Felix for help. 'Why don't we swap for a moment Alex?' Felix patted the back of his head and Alex jumped up with relief. He leant against the wall with his arms crossed in front of his chest taking deep breaths. Felix sat down between Markus and Tom.
'Markus, I have just learnt from these boys that you have aggressively threatened Alex to leak some intimate information about his private life to the press. Blackmail is a very serious offence and I'm finding this rather unnerving to learn that the captain of my team has done such a thing.' Markus was taken aback by the directness of Winter's words. Then he started laughing out loud. 'Oh this is brilliant,' he said chuckling, trying to get his breath back, 'so first Alex punches me in the face and basically attacks me in front of the whole team and then he accuses me of blackmail! This is getting better and better. What's next?', Winter's face was expressionless. Markus looked at him, 'you don't believe this nonsense do you sir? I mean the poor guy clearly lost his mind.'
Tom jumped up, his face was full of anger. Felix took his hand. 'Tommy, sit down,' he pulled him back down next to him and put one arm around his shoulders, 'easy.' He whispered into his ear. Winter gave the boys a look before he turned back to Markus. 'Alex will get punished for attacking you, there is absolutely no doubt about that,' he paused, 'but I'm afraid you threatening one of my players with the press due to his homosexual relationship is absolutely unacceptable.' Markus started to look nervous. 'Homosexual relationship? But this is ridiculous. I have never threatened him with anything. He is the one who attacked me!'
Winter started playing the recording again. Markus stared at his manager in disbelief before he turned to Alex. 'You little piece of shit.' He sounded surprised. And almost impressed. 'Enough!', Winter shouted and stood up, banging his fist on the desk, 'Markus, you have put some of my players through emotional stress. I have trusted you with their wellbeing as their captain and you have abused this position of power beyond belief. I can therefore no longer keep you in the position of captain of this team. I will also consult with the other managers whether we will still invite you as a player to future matches of this team,' he took a deep breath, 'I would also urge you not to leak any information
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