How to Become Rich by William Windsor (ebook offline reader .txt) 📕

Idiot.

The third class, unfortunately, are always with us, but I do not expect to convince them. They never were known to be convinced of anything. You can easily learn to distinguish an individual of this class by the shape of his head. Here is one I carry for illustration. He argues that the world is flat and does not revolve on its axis once in 24 hours, because, if it did, the water would all be spilled out of the Mississippi river. Life is too short to argue with this class, and I can only promise them that before I leave this platform they will be in the same category that a fellow was once who went to a prayer-meeting slightly intoxicated and fell asleep. Toward the close of the meeting everybody began to get happy, and the preacher called on everybody who wanted to go to Heaven to stand up. Everybody stood up but our intoxicated friend, who  was awakened by the uprising. Then the preacher called on everybody who wanted to go to hell to stand up. Our friend by this time comprehended that something was before the house and staggered to his feet. He took one look at the preacher standing at the other end of the church and said: “Parson, (hic) I don’t know what the question, is (hic) before the house, but you and I (hic) are in the smallest minority that ever I saw.”

So it is with you, my friends. If you don’t believe in Phrenology when I dismiss you to-night, remember that you are in the minority in this audience, and a very small minority at that, composed of unprogressive mossbacks and persons of small mental capacity, and if you will call at my rooms to-morrow, I’ll tell you to which of these classes you belong.

In the study of scientific topics it is well in the outset to establish definitions. I will, therefore, commence by looking our subject squarely in the face, and establishing a concise definition of Phrenology.

Phrenology is the science of intelligence. It is derived from two Greek words—Phren intelligence Logos “discourse” or science. But before we can properly understand this definition we must have a definition of the term “Science,” which is about as often misused as any word I know.

Science is classified knowledge. The word itself in its etymology signifies what we know about a particular  subject. And whenever we learn two facts about any subject, and we differentiate and classify those two facts, we have a science of that subject. Thus we have the science of Astronomy, containing the classified facts that intelligent observers have learned concerning the stars. The science of Mathematics, a classification of knowledge concerning numbers, and the science of Phrenology, which simply means the facts that intelligent observers have collected concerning intelligence, classified and reduced to rules to serve a practical purpose.

Before I leave this term “Science,” I wish to draw a distinction between a science and an art. The science is the classified knowledge; the art is the process of turning that knowledge to practical account. The science of Astronomy never discovered a star, the science of Arithmetic never computed the value of a fraction. The sciences are merely icebergs of cold, hard facts piled up in crystallized principles and rules. Art is the warm, living application of these principles and rules to serve the needs of mankind. The art of Astronomy, with the assistance of its handmaiden, the art of Mathematics, astounds the world with its achievements, and holds in one hand the balances with which it weighs the sun, and in the other the chain with which it surveys the distance to the Pleiades.

So with the Science and Art of Phrenology. The science is as absolute as Mathematics. In its principles  there are no fallacies. To its rules there are absolutely no exceptions. The Art of Phrenology, on the other hand, is estimative, and the results of its application will depend on the graces, the gifts and the abilities of him who seeks to apply it. As we have brilliant astronomers and poor astronomers, as we have correct mathematicians and incorrect ones, so we may have phrenologists whose discoveries and whose workmanship may command the admiration of the world, those whose talents are of the order of mediocrity, and those who blunder on all occasions.

You have had Phrenology defined to you as the Science of Intelligence, and you naturally ask for a definition of intelligence itself.

Intelligence is the result of the radiation of magnetism from every object in the universe. Magnetism is radiated by different bodies in different