breaking glass by KLeena Girl (books to read in your 30s .txt) 📕

when she was about to head home from school. He had told her that he couldn’t come by this evening and how very sorry he was. Serena had answered him that he should better hang up and go, before she was going to end their relationship. Now she regretted her harsh words, but she had been really furious at him.
She let out a hard, relieving cry before her shoulders slumped down. Looking around the kitchen, she decided it was best to do the dishes, since her parents were too busy arguing. The situation hadn’t really changed. It was quite the opposite, her parents behaved as badly as they did before she met Lucas and David. She sighed, as she opened tap, letting the water fill up the sink.
After washing the dishes, she grabbed her favourite blanket, turned on the TV and sat down on the couch. At least, this evening her favourite show was on due. Snuggling into the warm blanket, Serena looked through the window. Her eyes drifted far away into a dreaming state. Outside it was almost freezing and rain drummed down onto the ground. You could expect such weather in January.
The phone rang and she wondered, if her parents picked up her phone or if it was on her. She really wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. After some times ringing, the birthday girl pushed the blanket aside and stood up reluctantly. She picked up the phone and announced her name. A familiar voice answered her, „Here’s Maria.” Serena noticed the trembling in Mrs Newman’s voice and feared what was about to come. „Lucas had an accident this evening. He’s dead.”
Serena couldn’t say if Maria said anything else to her because the phone hit the floor, the second she had received the bad news. Completely stoic, she returned to the living room, turning off the TV and situating the blanket neatly folded onto the ground. She grabbed her coat and dressed without hurry. Then she shouted, „I’m going for a walk” into the dark house, though probably nobody even noticed.
Serena made her way to the rail station and took the next train to Hamburg. As she watched the landscape passing by through the window, her thoughts were racing, although she didn’t realize the deep impact of the information, she had just been given. The rain soon became a storm, as night fell over area. Her eyes had become empty. And whenever a guard came by, she didn’t look up or talk. She simply held the ticket up and waited till he was gone again. Everything was so surreal. Suddenly, she couldn’t even remember why she was on this train. All she knew was, she was going to see Lucas today. Shouldn’t that make her happy? Then why did she feel so miserable?


* * *


„He was hit by a car. The driver was drunk and had overseen the red traffic light. Lucas had no chance to dodge the crash”, Mr Newman whispered in a sad voice, as he entered the Jewish mortuary with his wife, his daughter and Serena. Jenny was crying in her mother’s arms, while Robert and Maria had a hard time holding back their tears. Serena slowly walked to the place, where Lucas’ corpse lay. There he was, blue spots all over his body, some cuts marking the fresh wounds from the accident. But to her, he was as beautiful as ever. His soft brown hair surrounded his manly face and his hands had been nicely placed at his sides. He looked so handsome in the black tuxedo. And if you looked closely, you could see his chest moving because of his breathing.
Serena’s hand reached out to touch his chest. „What are you talking about?” She said with the delirious happiness of a child. „His heart – it’s beating.”
Mr Newman looked up to the young girl, who now caressed the face of the dead young man. „And look, he’s breathing.” She bent down to kiss his forehead softly. „I knew everything would be alright. He promised me so.”
Mrs Newman’s head was now tilted up as well. She exchanged insecures glance with her husband, before telling Jenny to leave the hall.
„Serena, my dear”, Maria sobbed and laid an arm around the girl’s shoulders, „come outside with me.”
But Serena struggled to get out of the woman’s grip and instead took her boyfriend’s hand. „No! I don’t want to leave him. I want to be there, when he wakes up!”
Tears rolled down the face of Mrs Newman and her voice cracked. „He isn’t going to wake up.”
„Of course he is”, Serena argued eagerly, „he loves me, he won’t leave me!”
Jenny’s father didn’t know what to do anymore. He could clearly see that the situation was overstraining the girl’s mind. So he carefully stepped towards her. „It’s okay, Serena. He needs to sleep for now. Come with me.”
„I can’t leave him alone! He’ll be lonely!” Her breath was laboured and she started to feel fainting.
„It’s okay, take my hand, he’ll be alright.” Just as she did as he asked, her legs gave in and she blacked out. At least, now he could carry her to the Newman’s house without having her fighting back. Mrs Newman, still crying, called a taxi and a doctor, who would examine the exhausted 14-year-old as soon as they arrived at home.


* * *


„She’s in deep shock. The confrontation with your son’s death has caused a trauma in her. It would be the best for her to rest a while.”
„Thank you, doctor”, Mr Newman answered and closed the door. His gaze wandered to the 14-year-old, whose foggy eyes had cleared again. Serena sat on the couch, seemingly not aware of what happened around her. Her fingers were shivering and her skin was paled to almost white.
„He is really dead, isn’t he?” Her voice was quivering as well and her eyes contained a feeling of indifference, as she glanced at he boyfriend’s father, who simply nodded. „Can I…can I go into his room, please?”
He figured out that was maybe a way to relieve her sorrow, so he agreed. „Yes.”
Serena stormed upstairs and lay down onto his bed. It smelt so wonderful of him. She closed her eyes, willing to let this nightmare fade away. Soon enough, she would be wakening with Lucas’ arm around her, his breath tickling her neck. She waited, but when she opened her eyes, she still was in Lucas’ room, with the little bedside lamp on, outside Hamburg at night. No, no, no! Her head now screamed inside of her. She grabbed his pillow tight and breathed in. This couldn’t be happening, this couldn’t be the real world!
Because if it was, then she just wanted to die right here.


* * *


Almost two days had passed by and Serena refused to leave Lucas’ room. Maria had tried to call her for dinner, but she didn’t come downstairs. When Mr Newman asked her to eat anything, she didn’t comply. At least, she took the water Jenny had brought her. All the time, Serena lay on his bed, staring out into the distance. Dark circles marked her green eyes and there was no sign of colour left in her face. She couldn’t sleep, she couldn’t eat and it was beyond her how she was still able to breathe. It was dawn and she listened to the clock ticking, when suddenly someone entered the room. Though, she didn’t bother to look up, until she felt a warm hand on her cheek. „Serena.”
Her gaze met a pair of bright blue eyes, which screamed of sorrow and regret. He carefully sat down onto the bed, next to the girl’s now alerted frame. If he was here, then it was real. „David?” It was even less than a whisper. She pushed herself up into a halfway sitting position. „I don’t want him to be gone.”
David took her hand and his and pulled the devastated being in his arms. „I know”, he breathed into her unruly hair, „I know.”
Serena closed her eyes and leaned against his shoulder. She was in so deep pain, that she didn’t even care what was going to happen the following day. As she drifted off into a dreamless sleep, the fact of the upcoming funeral was disappearing in between the mess of her thoughts.


* * *


Rain fell down from the clouds that hadn’t left Hamburg for days. It was nearly unbearable. Grief and sadness weighed down on the people standing in front of the young man’s grave. Lucas had died at the age of 17. It wasn’t a common funeral, since it was not only Jewish, but also about such a young person. His family from all places in the world had come to pay him their last respects. Maria, Robert and Jenny were crying and holding each other, when the rabbi spoke the prayer and the blessing. David had tears in his eyes, which silently slid down his face. In his hand, he held an umbrella, covering Serena and himself from the cold rain drops. He looked over to her, who didn’t cry or weep at all. Her eyes still held no emotions, as she stared at the ground. Making no sign of reaction, she had watched the whole rite. The emerald iris stayed hollow, even when the grave was filled up with dirt. The ceremony was almost over and the rabbi invited them all to the obsequies afterwards. The crowd was leaving, but Serena stayed behind. When David noticed, he turned around to call for his friend, though he heard her immediately.
Angry sobs and broken cries could be heard loudly and all over the cemetery. Now even the funeral guests looked back to see the young girl slumping down to the ground, tears were spilling over her beautiful face.
„You promised me”, she screamed, smashing her fists on the ground, „You promised!” Her skin brushed the ground and was covered with mud. „Liar! I trusted you and here you go, breaking your promise!” Her breath was laboured and the people around her were shocked by her behaviour, even though she could care less. „How can you do this to me? Why do you leave me alone?” She sank down, her clothes completely drenched by now, onto the earth. „I need you so, Lucas!” Her cries were muffled by her hands, she had just pressed against her face. David knew he had to interfere before she would try to harm herself or anyone else around her. It was breaking him even more to see her suffering so badly. He approached her soaked and shivering form and put his coat around her. „Let’s go, Serena.”
She didn’t protest, when he helped her to stand up and held her in his arm, his other still carrying the umbrella. The crowd watched them with a pitiful look, some even eyed at Serena with a sense of outrage. David tried to shield his friend from those strangers as best as he could and took a taxi to the hotel he lived in.


* * *


Her make-up was smeared, her clothes wet and her skin way too cold. David brought her into the bathroom of the little apartment, he lived in for the time being. It was in a hotel, not far away from the Newman’s house. Robert and Maria had invited him to stay at theirs, but he had politely declined. He knew there wasn’t so much room and he didn’t want Lucas’ parents to care about another guest after their son’s death. Turning on the heating, David took her soppy clothes to hang them up to dry. Now he needed to find some new clothes for Serena to wear. He knew she had come