Laid Bare: Essays and Observations by Judson, Tom (read 50 shades of grey .TXT) 📕

worry about it,” he said. “I looked at your site. I enjoyed your, uh, writing.”

Hmmm… the only reason I hadn’t been riding on Gus’s coattails was that I didn’t think it would be right to campaign with an unfair advantage. Was I letting a great marketing ploy slip through my fingers? I thought it best that I let my record speak for itself.

From the road I had written a “report” on our lousy contract. It had spread like wildfire throughout the union, so my bona fides were in order, as far as my commitment to the cause went, and my name was out there as an activist. In the process I had also done a nifty job of blacklisting myself. I became known as the Norma Rae of the company and if I never work again I won’t have to wonder why.

From that experience, however, I knew that e-mail was a powerful tool for reaching lots of folks I didn’t even know. I sent out a notice announcing my candidacy and waited for the responses to pour in. People wrote saying they remembered my report and would vote for me. I was starting to let myself become cautiously optimistic.

But, still no word from Italy. Where were my pearls of wisdom; my words of encouragement? Where was the quote for my webpage?

After a second round of e-mail campaigning I received a note from a stranger saying, “I don’t know how you are as an actor, but you’re a helluva campaigner.”

Things were looking good.

As it happened, the day the ballots were counted I was on location north of San Francisco shooting a video. Someone from Equity would be calling with the results and I imagined being borne shoulder-high around the set after receiving the good news while Chi Chi playfully squirted me with lube and my costars presented me with a bouquet of condoms.

It was a tough B-Roll shoot that day, and I had forgotten about the election when, during a break, I checked my messages.

“Hello, this is Actor’s Equity calling with the election results…”

“Sshhhh! Quiet everybody. I think this is it!”, I hissed.

The voice continued: “We’re sorry to inform you that you did not…”

I gently closed my phone and stuck it in my bag.

I finished the day sporting a stiff upper lip (among other things) and rode silently back to the motel in the back of the van. After a shower I logged on to check my e-mail and, at last , there it was in my inbox:

“Caro Gus,

I hope you yet visitation my beautiful official site where you can find and buy my beautiful book "Memorie" a colours of 192 pg. (photographer a colours) where you find any response for your many questions...

Big Kisses”

That was it? “Big kisses” and a pitch for her book? She didn’t even sign her name.

Later I learned that the meager 20% of the union membership who voted simply re-instated incumbent members. I came in 4th out of seven; Kate one from the bottom (I guess Atlantic City just ain’t Broadway.) It’s a shame, because she’s well-spoken and committed.

Since the election, I’ve made a bunch of dirty movies, Kate’s playing Sally Bowles somewhere in Westchester County, and Cicciolina? Well, she’s selling her beautiful book online.

Losing my bid for Equity Council, combined with my twin losses at the GayVNs and Grabbys, proved to be discouraging, although it didn’t shake my conviction that I can lick butt better than any of those damned incumbents.

But you can be sure that next time I run for something, it’ll be a bus.

COME OUT, COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE

A little-reported subplot in the recent resignation of New Jersey Governor James McGreevey is that persistent rumors regarding his homosexuality had been circulating since he assumed office. In other words, everyone already knew.

This is my case—inspired by several moving e-mails I have received from visitors to this site--for proudly stating (as Jim McGreevey did) that “I am a gay American.” As he said, coming out to the world will, “keep me from the pitfalls of a divided self or secret truths.”

Those “secret truths” are usually very open secrets; they’re the proverbial elephant in the room that goes unmentioned. But, by leaving things undefined, by not being clear about one’s relationship to the world vis-á-vis one’s sexuality, not only are those who would oppress us free to do so with impunity, those who love us are unable to fully share in our lives.

Dick Cheney supports gay marriage.

The one and only reason he arrived at that position is because his daughter is a lesbian. Polls have continuously shown that people who know homosexuals personally are more supportive of gay rights. Here’s a news flash for you: everyone knows a homosexual. They may not know they do, but I believe it’s more likely they’ve never had to deal with the obvious fact because the person in question has let them off the hook by remaining in the closet.

Therefore, by extrapolation, coming out helps not only the person making the announcement, but the gay population at large. Social policy is formed slowly, over time, as mores and beliefs evolve. Each man and woman who tells their loved ones “I’m gay” is helping to change the minds of six, eight, 10 other people directly and scores of others down the line. It’s not too farfetched to say that someone who comes out tomorrow is directly responsible for increasing the likelihood that gay marriage will be fully accepted in the future.

Your friends and family will appreciate it.

When a friend or relative or coworker is still in the closet, there tends to be a lot of acrobatic conversational skills in play. So much has to be talked around or ignored.

I’m not blind to the fact that some circumstances might make this task