Lavengro by George Borrow (read me a book txt) 📕

“are you here? I am glad to see you, come this way.” “Stand back,” said he to his company, as I followed him to the bar, “stand back for me and this gentleman.” Two or three young fellows were in the bar, seemingly sporting yokels, drinking sherry and smoking. “Come, gentlemen,” said the landlord, “clear the bar, I must have a clear bar for me and my friend here.” “Landlord, what will you take,” said one, “a glass of sherry? I know you like it.” “⁠⸻ sherry and you too,” said the landlord, “I want neither sherry nor yourself; didn’t you hear what I told you?” “All right, old fellow,” said the other, shaking the landlord by the hand, “all right, don’t wish to intrude⁠—but I suppose when you and your friend have done, I may come in again;” then, with “a sarvant, sir,” to me, he took himself into the kitchen, followed by the rest of the sporting yokels.

Thereupon the landlord, taking a bottle of ale from a basket, uncorked it, and pouring the contents into two large glasses, handed me one, and motioning me to sit down, placed himself by me; then, emptying his own glass at a draught, he gave a kind of grunt of satisfaction, and fixing his eyes upon the opposite side of the bar, remained motionless, without saying a word, buried apparently in important cogitations. With respect to myself, I swallowed my ale more leisurely, and was about to address my friend, when his niece, coming into the bar, said that more and more customers were arriving, and how she should supply their wants she did not know, unless her uncle would get up and help her.

“The customers!” said the landlord, “let the scoundrels wait till you have time to serve them, or till I have leisure to see after them.” “The kitchen won’t contain half of them,” said his niece. “Then let them sit out abroad,” said the landlord. “But there are not benches enough, uncle,” said the niece. “Then let them stand or sit on the ground,” said the uncle, “what care I; I’ll let them know that the man who beat Tom of Hopton stands as well again on his legs as ever.” Then opening a side door which led from the bar into the back yard, he beckoned me to follow him. “You treat your customers in rather a cavalier manner,” said I, when we were alone together in the yard.

“Don’t I?” said the landlord; “and I’ll treat them more so yet; now I have got the whiphand of the rascals I intend to keep it. I daresay you are a bit surprised with regard to the change which has come over things since you were last here. I’ll tell you how it happened. You remember in what a desperate condition you found me, thinking of changing my religion, selling my soul to the man in black, and then going and hanging myself like Pontius Pilate; and I daresay you can’t have forgotten how you gave me good advice, made me drink ale, and give up sherry. Well, after you were gone, I felt all the better for your talk, and what you had made me drink, and it was a mercy that I did feel better; for my niece was gone out, poor thing, and I was left alone in the house, without a soul to look at, or to keep me from doing myself a mischief in case I was so inclined. Well, things wore on in this way till it grew dusk, when in came that blackguard Hunter with his train to drink at my expense, and to insult me as usual; there were more than a dozen of them, and a pretty set they looked. Well, they ordered about in a very free and easy manner for upwards of an hour and a half, occasionally sneering and jeering at me, as they had been in the habit of doing for some time past; so, as I said before, things wore on, and other customers came in, who, though they did not belong to Hunter’s gang, also passed off their jokes upon me; for, as you perhaps know, we English are a set of low hounds, who will always take part with the many by way of making ourselves safe, and currying favour with the stronger side. I said little or nothing, for my spirits had again become very low, and I was verily scared and afraid. All of a sudden I thought of the ale which I had drank in the morning, and of the good it did me then, so I went into the bar, opened another bottle, took a glass, and felt better; so I took another, and feeling better still, I went back into the kitchen, just as Hunter and his crew were about leaving. ‘Mr. Hunter,’ said I, ‘you and your people will please to pay me for what you have had?’ ‘What do you mean by my people?’ said he, with an oath. ‘Ah, what do mean you by calling us his people?’ said the clan. ‘We are nobody’s people;’ and then there was a pretty load of abuse, and threatening to serve me out. ‘Well,’ said I, ‘I was perhaps wrong to call them your people, and beg your pardon and theirs. And now you will please to pay me for what you have had yourself, and afterwards I can settle with them.’ ‘I shall pay you when I think fit,’ said Hunter. ‘Yes,’ said the rest, ‘and so shall we. We shall pay you when we think fit.’ ‘I tell you what,’ said Hunter, ‘I conceives I do such an old fool as you an honour when I comes into his house and drinks his beer, and goes away without paying for it;’ and then there was a roar of laughter from everybody, and almost all said the same thing. ‘Now, do you please to pay me, Mr. Hunter?’ said I.