Discovering Truths by B. Benfield (chrysanthemum read aloud .TXT) 📕

I’d been at my job for almost a year and I loved every minute of it. Being out of the house and doing something felt great, and I genuinely loved my job. Mike kept saying that he was going to retire soon and I’d be taking his position. Although I loved the thought of moving forward in the company, I couldn’t stand the thought of him leaving. He was one of the main reasons I enjoyed getting up and coming to work every day. Not only did he make work fun and exciting, I’d learned a lot from him, and we’d developed a strong friendship. I’d tell him he was too young to retire and pray every day that it wouldn’t happen any time soon.

I’d saved enough money that I could comfortably move out on my own without any help from Marcus, yet, I held on…

It was like any other Monday. Marcus was already gone and I rolled out of bed, pushing myself to the bathroom to start my shower. I brushed my teeth as I waited for the water to heat, and once it was ready, I climbed in. When I was finished, I wrapped myself in a towel and followed my normal routine, drying my hair and applying my make-up. As I waited for my curling iron to heat, I walked out to my bedroom and grabbed my phone. This was all a part of my morning routine. I did the same thing every day. I checked the weather, news, Facebook, and e-mail before I did my hair.

When I reached my e-mail, the phone nearly slipped out of my hand when my eyes landed on the letter that awaited me.

To: Abby West

From: Gage Atwood

This couldn’t be real life. What could he possibly have to say to me? I didn’t think I’d ever hear from him again. Emotions took over as I thought about the contents of the e-mail. Just when I thought I could get over him, something happened to pull me back in. Although I wished I could ignore him, I knew I’d never be able to. I clicked the message and tried to prepare myself for whatever came next.

Abby,

I will completely understand if you delete this, but I hope you don’t. I’ll also understand if you reply with a big F you, but I hope you don’t do that either. I hope you take a minute to hear me out.

It’s been almost six months without you and I’ve never been more miserable in my life. I made a huge mistake by ending things with you. To be honest, I was overwhelmed. Everything had become too much and I was worried that my feelings were becoming too strong. That’s hard for me to say because I’m a guy and I don’t talk about feelings, but I’m telling you now because I hope you’ll consider giving me another chance. I miss you so much. I miss talking to you every day, I miss our lunch dates, I miss our truck dates…I miss it all. We were on the same wavelength. We understood each other.

I know this is a lot to take in. Please think about what I’ve said before you respond. Please also know that I mean every word I say. I really messed up and I see that now. I hope to hear from you soon.

Gage

I sat the phone down beside me and stared off into space, processing everything I just read. Am I dreaming? I had hoped that I would receive a message from Gage, but now that I had, I didn’t know how to respond. Part of me knew that if I got involved with him again, I would just be setting myself up to get hurt. The other part loved him so much that I didn’t care what might happen. What about what could happen?

My heart was conflicted. I wanted to respond and tell him how much I missed him too, but the other part of me wanted to tell him where he could shove his sweet words. Although I wanted to believe them, I couldn’t help but wonder if it was all a bunch of bullshit lines because he missed only our physical connection.

I didn’t know what to do. How was I ever going to make it through my workday like this?

***

Focusing on my work was nearly impossible. The only thing on my brain was Gage and the unexpected e-mail. When the afternoon finally rolled around and it was time for lunch, I walked outside to my car and climbed in, turning on the air full blast. All morning I’d been thinking about if and how I was going to respond. I wanted to be strong enough to dismiss him, but I couldn’t. There was no more thinking to it. All I’d hoped for was to reconnect with him, and now was my chance.

I grabbed my phone from my purse and pulled up the app. I wasn’t going to write another e-mail. I didn’t want to wait for a response. I wanted to talk to him now. I un-blocked him on Messenger and searched for his name.

Me: Hey. Got your e-mail. Thought this would be quicker.

It was only a few seconds before the dots started jumping and his reply came through.

Gage: You had me worried. I wasn’t sure that I’d hear back from you.

Me: I took the morning to think about everything…figure out how I wanted to respond.

Gage: I understand that. I know it was a lot that you probably didn’t expect, but it was all true, Abby. I’ve missed you so much.

Me: I’ve missed you too Gage. Do you realize how bad you hurt me?

Gage: I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to. I feel so stupid now. You are so beautiful and we have this crazy connection…

Me: I’ve barely got