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performed his duty as a Master At Arms, protecting the docks and warehouses containing stores and ammunition. He had only received two letters from Marie while she was gone, but understanding her circumstances he wasn’t concerned. Then, one day in his office he was told that there was a telephone call for him. He walked to his desk, pushed the blinking button, lifted the receiver and said, Lieutenant Sayer.”

“It’s me. I’m back.”

He felt his heart skip a beat in happiness. “Oh, it’s so good to hear your voice. When did you get in?” he asked.

“About an hour ago. Robert, I have to talk to you.”

“ UT, oh, this doesn’t sound good. Somethings wrong. What is it?”

“Not on the telephone Robert.”

“Then where and when?”

“Meet me at the officers club. Will you be free at six?”

“Yes.”

“Then six it is.”

He heard the loud CLICK the receiver made when she hanged up.

At five fifty-five PM Robert walked into the officers club.

He stood for a moment as his eyes adjusted from the bright Hawaiian sunlight to the dim light of the club interior. Then, he saw her sitting alone at a table in the back of the room. He walked quickly to her. “ Hi”, he said bending down to kiss her.

She turned her head presenting only her cheek to him. “Damn, I don’t know what I did but it must have been a doozy. What’s wrong?”, he asked.

“Robert, sit down,” she instructed.

He took a seat removed his cap and placed it on the table.

“OK, whatever is bothering you spit it out,” he said.

“I’m resigning my commission and going home,” she said.

“Just like that. You leave me for a month, then come back only to tell me that you’re leaving the navy and going back to

Minnesota. You don’t even give me a reason. Something's happened. I don’t know what it is, but I sure as hell deserve and have the right to know what it is that brought this all about.”

“I’m pregnant!”, she said.

“That’s it? What’s so wrong about that?”

“It’s not your baby!”

Her words were like a blow to his midsection. He felt the breath in his lungs leave, replaced by heavy attempts to breathe normally again. Finally, able to talk he said, “Who is the father?”

“I told you when we first met that there was someone back home who wanted to marry me.”

“And he’s the father?”, asked Robert.

“Yes. Now, I suppose that you hate me.”

“Hate you? No. I don’t hate you. You can’t hate someone that you’ve loved and love still. I will say this I love you. You made a mistake. Lots of people do. Stay here with me. We can make it work.”

“No. Each time you look at me you’ll see my pregnancy. Each time you see the pregnancy you’ll remember my infidelity.

When the baby is born you’ll think of who I had been with. It’s not fair to you Robert. I don’t want either one of us to have to go through that.”

“ Well I understand, but I’m getting a little tired of being kicked in the ass by women. When are you leaving?,’ he asked.

“The day after tomorrow.”

“I see. Well, when you get home and if things don’t go right write me. You can contact me here or you have my New Jersey address. In the meanwhile you stay healthy and good luck in your marriage. If you need anything I’ll always be ready to help.’

With tears streaming down her cheeks, Marie said, “What will you do?”

Robert got up out of the chair, placed his cap on his head and said, “I don’t know. I’ll finish this hitch, go home, get on with my life and career. Think things over. Think of you, remember our times together. One thing I can tell you is that what I’ll be doing is stepping very, very, carefully into any future relationships with women’, he said as he walked away.

***************

On July 23, 1953, the armistice was signed between North Korea and the allies of the United Nations. It seemed that the war was over. Still, Robert Sayer went to work every day and to him, nothing had changed. One day, as he sat at his desk going over security assignments the telephone on his desk rang. He answered it, “Master At Arms, Lieutenant Sayer”.

“Lieutenant, come to Camp Smith ASAP”, said the man on the other end of the line. Camp Smith was the headquarters for the United States Pacific Command. He had no idea what they wanted him there for. After turning over the duty to another officer, Robert acquired a jeep and drove to the headquarters.

Once there he was told to see Commander Anderson. Which he did.

“Have a seat Lieutenant,” said the Commander.

Sayer took a seat in a hard, high back wooden chair and waited for the Commander to speak.

“I assume that you would like to know why you are here, said Anderson.

“Yes sir,”

“I’ll come right to the point. Right now there is a minesweeper leaving Guam. It’s the Courage, AM401. When it gets here it will resupply and refuel. Then, it will ship out for the United States. It is to go to the Philadelphia Naval Yard where upon its arrival it will be decommissioned. Before it can leave Pearl Harbor one billet has to be filled, that of an Engineer Officer. What do you know about Naval ship engines?”

“Absolutely nothing sir.”

“No matter. When you report onboard stay close, and I mean very close to your Chief Petty Officers. They’ll know more about what makes the ship go than anyone. In the mean time on your way out stop and ask a yeoman to give you every type of printed material we have on the power plant of AM minesweepers.”

“Yes, sir.”

“And, by the way. The reason you got this billet is because your record shows that you live near Philadelphia. Is that correct?.’ asked the commander.

“Yes sir, just sixty miles away.”

“Well, if they don’t discharge you, you’ll be close to home for liberty.”

“Yes, sir.”

“That’s all. Good luck lieutenant.”

“Thank you, sir.”

Three weeks later Sayer reported for duty on board the Courage. After meeting with the ships Captain and Executive Officer he stowed his gear then made his way to the engine room.

When he reached the end of the ladder he saw a Chief Petty Officer attired in blue denim who stood wiping his hands on a soiled, oil stained rag. “Attention On Deck”, the chief said loudly.

“As you were”, Robert replied. Looking at the Chief Sayer said. “Chief I’m your new Engineer Officer. Is there some place where we can talk in private?”

“Yes, sir. Follow me. We can talk over there beside the boiler.”

Robert followed the man and when they got to the boiler he looked around and then at the Chief and said, “To tell you the truth, I don’t know a damn thing about engines, motors, or anything else that makes this ship run.”

“You don’t know how happy that makes me sir. I’d rather have an officer tell me that he knows nothing about engines then pretend that he knows everything about engines. Welcome aboard sir. I’m Chief Petty Officer, Carl Dunn.”

“Lieutenant Sayer, Robert Sayer,” said the new Engineer Officer as he put out his right hand.

As the Courage made its way across the Pacific, Robert, much to the knowledge of Chief Dunn kept the four, Packard, ID 1700 diesel engines running smoothly. In calm seas, the minesweeper could make sixteen knots. At officers mess one evening the Captain announced that they would be approaching the Panama Canal the next day.

That night he tossed and turned in his bunk as the dream came to him again. This time he was knocking on the front door of her house in Wildwood. He heard her footsteps as she approached. She opened the door and asked, “What do you want?”

“I want you. I want you to come back to me.”

Janet stood silently for a moment then said, “Come In.”

His heart beat rapidly due to his happiness. It beat so fast that it woke him and in despair realize that once again it had only been a dream.

When the minesweeper entered the locks of the canal Robert went topside and stood on the deck watching the water fill the enclosure. As it did it lifted the Courage putting it in a position to enter the next lock. He turned his attention to the surrounding view, saw The cruise ship on the other side in a lock being lowered in order for it to enter the Pacific. He felt the heat of the sun in the Canal Zone and saw the workers going about the day.

A week later his ship entered the Delaware River and then into the Philadelphia Naval Yard. Once tied up to the dock Chief Dunn shut down the engines and the engine room became silent.

On his first weekend liberty, Robert took a cab to Thirteenth And Filbert and boarded a Public Service Bus to Atlantic City. Once home he changed into civilian clothes then sat and talked to his mother. “What are you going to do now that you’re home?”, she asked.

“You know that I’ll want to see Janet,” he answered.

“Don’t. You might as well know. While you were gone she got married. As a matter of fact she just recently gave birth to a son.”

“Why didn’t you write and tell me?”, he asked.

“Because your father said not to. We were afraid that you would do something crazy like go absent without leave, we thought then and we think now that it was best not to tell you.”

Robert sat silent for a moment. When he felt composed he asked, “Who did she marry?”

“ A man named Birch, Harvey Birch. He’s big in real estate and is a contractor.”

“I see. Well, at least she married well,” he said as he got up from the chair. “I think I’ll take a walk. I haven’t seen the boardwalk in some time,” he continued.

As he walked along the boardwalk he caught the aroma of hot dogs, hamburgers, french fries, popcorn and peanuts, all being cooked and prepared by the vendors. The smells took him back to a different time, to a different place. The time was when he was with Janet. The place was Wildwood. They were in love.

At least he was in love. He could still hear the sound of the music being played on the carousel. He remembered the excited laughs and screams of children who rode the different rides on the amusement pier. Most of all he recalled the feel of Janet holding on to him as the Ferris Wheel chair they were sitting in began to rock and sway. Then, reality came back to him and he found himself looking out at the ocean. As far as he could see from the shoreline to the horizon there was a vast emptiness, just like the emptiness in his heart. He turned and began to walk back home.

************

After his honorable discharge from the Navy Robert Sayer took and passed the New Jersey Bar Examination. Then he applied for a position at the prestigious law firm of Pratt, Pratt, And Parlin. At ten o’clock in the morning of Monday, May 23, 1955, Robert Sayer sat in the office of Oliver Pratt being interviewed.

“I see that you did very well on the bar exam. Congratulations. Now, since you’ve come to us with your hat in your hand, besides a position what else are you looking for?”, asked Pratt.

“A career.”

“An excellent answer sir. Now, allow me to be perfectly clear.

Our firm is involved in corporate law. Before you ask me why I’ll explain. First of all corporations, for the most part, have the ability to pay our fees promptly. Second, of all, heads of corporations generally belong to the same social groups and country clubs as the judges. So, you see, if say a corporate head is having a legal problem we’re more or less one up entering the courtroom. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes , sir.”

“Good, now it is my understanding that you wish to work

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