Be Lonely, Be Your Best by Santosh Jha (good books to read for 12 year olds TXT) 📕

This poise is very subjective and individualistic. Moreover, this poise already has a tough task to handle the pulls and pushes of seven elements of personality and eight intangible affecters, which are internal to our being. Therefore, this poise must never be subjected to more and greater drift and challenges from external milieus. It needs a state of self, which has to be amenable for inbound energies of deep concentration and introspection. This state of loneliness – this position of mindfulness of the mechanism of our consciousness, is a highly facilitative state, which we need to accept. Loneliness is a positive realism for an endowed self, seeking further empowerment. This initiates with mindfulness, which has loneliness as its primary prerequisite. The populist cultural meaning of loneliness as a sad and bad realism must be unlearned.

Few people recognize that their own personhood is a mystery. Fewer still care enough about the mystery to understand it. The Pop-Belief is – Life is more about living it than it is about understanding it. However, shouldn’t we ask ourselves, ‘Who are we?’ This mindfulness is primary need for our overall wellness. The answer needs knowing and it needs allowance to some knowledge, other than what we hold dear to our heart. That is why being lonely is option-less – a definitive facilitative idealism for wellness and personal excellence.

The trouble is; the process of understanding one’s ‘self’ is pitted against one’s own beliefs about one’s ‘self’. It is not an easy task to determine which of these beliefs are true and which are mere ideas. Scientists say, ‘We are in the error of believing that our Body and We are the same things. We are not aware that each of us is a virtual agent, a self, that speaks for his or her organism’.

There are two subjects within you. One is the Generic Subject, which is your innate body mechanism. It accepts only tangible things and is mostly reactive and self-initiated. The other subject is Specific Subject, which leads a mindful and thoughtful action. The self, the you is a functional relationship between the two subjects and is a virtual agent. You are a bridge between the two ends of the two subjects. Mindfulness makes you say hello to your true consciousness.

The ‘I’, which exists and performs in each layer of consciousness is not singular, rather it is the summation of different Me of different layers of consciousnesses. So, there are different I when you are rising in the morning, playing with your kids, praying in the church, dealing finance with your colleagues, watching a movie in the evening, dizzy after boozing and finally in bed with your spouse.

Different life situations, requiring diverse sets of ‘action-thought-behaviour’ patterns, as commensurate with ambient milieus and cultural appropriates, engender different layers of consciousnesses. In all these layers, the I may be different but there is one I, in higher consciousness, which is always sort of commanding all the former Is.

This Master I is not singular and independent, rather a summation of the all other I. The I in the higher consciousness is not something aloof from an individual. The higher self is not a rejection of individual’s baser selves or instincts. This Master I is a mind positioning within, which accepts conflicts of the different personality aspects and functions – the different I.

It is a super state of mind awareness, which recognizes all aspects; be it in any state of unconscious or subconscious. It attempts to bring them to the layer of higher consciousness for harmonizing them into a fruitful whole. This higher consciousness must be in harmonious relationship and overall poise with all aspects and functions of an individual personality, like a true master and always be in control. This is a huge and tough process and surely needs this facilitative state of self, called loneliness, as it initiates the process of mindfulness.

Spiritualism gives us a metaphor of Master I being the driver of a chariot with six horses, reigning in all of them to a singular path of appropriate. The core issue is to understand the higher consciousness in detail, as, it is this I, which has the definitive role of being the master of an individual.

This Master I is the media for exploration of an expanded experience of human identity, capacity and potential. This I leads self to a journey into transpersonal dimensions. These dimensions encompass the higher levels of the energy spectrum: realms of higher consciousness that transcend the everyday awareness of the personality.

Many psychic phenomena are strictly emotional or delusional, tinged with fears, personal prejudices and wishful thinking. These are moments when one of your I may take off on obsessive flights. This is the test of your Master I navigation controls. The Master I must always be evolving and as it evolves, the dimensions of consciousnesses get enlarged and the Master I is empowered more.

The above descriptions about consciousness are aimed at bringing about the importance of understanding consciousness and its mechanism in details. Once we understand and accept the intricate mechanism of consciousness and how it is primarily instrumental in our wellness and excellence, we shall happily accept that all cognitions and causalities are dependent on consciousness and this consciousness instinctively being in a state of drift and flux, has to be assigned qualitative time and space for a very mindful and retrospective thought process. That is why loneliness becomes a cardinal need for all people, especially those, who are used to of fast paced life and habit of multitasking.

The mechanism of our own mind consciousness is designed in such a way that it excels in reacting to things in its ambient milieus. We are essentially a reactive genius. However, we are no more purely instinctive beings. We live in societies with cultures, which define our choices. The consciousness is bound to be wavering between what is our nature and what comes to us as nurture, in the form of milieus.

In the milieu we live, we are always faced with newer questions as well as answers. Our wellness and excellence depends on how well we manage the incessant process of learning and unlearning. The unlearning is far more important than learning in the process of our evolution to wellness and excellence. Learning surely is possible even in fast-paced life full of drift and flux, in a state of sub-consciousness. However, unlearning is a tough task, needing a qualitative leisure time and space, a very conscious mindfulness, which the happy situation of loneliness facilitates. We have this ideal state for unlearning when we land in loneliness. That is why the first intelligence for us in this clutter culture is that we must unlearn the misgivings associated with loneliness.

**

What Researches Discover About Loneliness

And How They Put You In Driver’s Seat

This realism of loneliness, as we see its different manifestations and dimensions in contemporary societies, especially in complex and developed cultures, must be examined from two possible ways. First of course is the populist perception, which often is not what an objective perspective can accept. This is largely because this populist perception about loneliness is a creation of people affected by the troubles of loneliness themselves. That is why it has larger elements of subjective perceptions, coloured by pep psychology and mass media.

It has to be accepted that it is a populist practice to add more fiction into facts. Often, most fictions about things start with facts but populism ensures that subjective narratives and personal lore also become part and parcel of the objective reality. Populist perception about loneliness being a collective realism of the experiences of lonely people itself, loads of extrapolated wisdom and experiences easily become acceptable as fact. Human brain is genius of extrapolations.

However, scientific, objective and logically singular fact about loneliness is far from what populist realism stands as. It is very important for all people to understand and accept this singular objective factsheet about loneliness. Yes, it has to be admitted that it is not going to be easy for those people suffering from loneliness to accept this, as it somehow puts the larger onus on them. Still, accepting helps in unlearning the clichéd and stereotypes about loneliness, which is predominant in popular perception of most.

Most scientists define loneliness subjectively. That is, they believe, if you consider yourself lonely, you are. They insist that loneliness must be seen as an internal, subjective experience, not an external, objective condition. It is an objective realism that people grow lonely because of the gloomy stories they perceive and tell themselves.

This realism about loneliness has to be accepted. It is of primary importance, as the diagnosis of real meaning, nature and actualism of the realism of loneliness, in all its manifestations and multidimensionality, shall help us in accepting that loneliness is largely about subjective perceptions and that is why, an individual is very well endowed to not only come out of this perceived loneliness troubles, rather also begin to value, treasure and enjoy it. Moreover, we shall then begin to use this facility of loneliness as a tool of empowerment for life-living wellness and personal excellence. So, about loneliness, we all need to have two different process done simultaneously – unlearning and then learning.

Enough researches have established that lonely people have just as much social capital, defined by physical attractiveness, height, weight, socioeconomic status, and academic achievement, etc., as their non-lonely peers. What this hints at?

It is the same, which the above fact asserts. That is, perception as well as realism about loneliness is very subjective, very individualistic and that is why loneliness can be successfully handled by the affected individual itself. Researchers also maintain that the less educated are lonelier than the better educated. This also clearly points to the same fact about loneliness being a very subjective realism and a person, who has better mental and consciousness abilities, can truly avoid loneliness trap and can be endowed enough to come out of it successfully. This shall be a truly winning, enjoyable and self-worthy experience for all.

Researches establish the fact that lonely people are not necessarily more isolated. Also, it needs to be known and accepted that scientists say, ‘what we most crave is the company of other people, but it can be that very company that sets us off to what we perceive as loneliness and then begin to belief in its onset’. Let us spare and invest good amount of positivity, leisure, acceptance and innocent reception about some core realism about loneliness.

Researchers find that loneliness often has loads to do with our intimacy needs and how we handle it. Also, researches confirm that a key part of feeling lonely is feeling rejected, and that, it turns out, is the most damaging part. It is for sure that the feeling of rejection is somehow a corollary of the core issue of intimacy, which is at the centre of the emotions of loneliness. This series of related emotions and realism have to be very carefully understood and accepted.

Researchers say, ‘What is different about lonely people from other non-lonely ones is how they interpret their social interactions with friends and acquaintances. Loneliness is interpreted by scientists as the ‘perceived’ gap and ‘inconsistency’ between what someone desires in relationships, especially intimate relationships and what one actually has or finds in these relationships. Studies say that lonely people tend to feel put upon and misunderstood. The researchers say, ‘lonely people are more likely to attribute problems in social relationships not to themselves but to others, and often see themselves as victims who are already giving as much as they can to their relationships, but get back poor things.’

This must be viewed with a very affectionate and compassionate heart and mind.