Her Love Fades... by Kerry Boo.. (books suggested by bill gates TXT) 📕

and I let a few tears escape. A few tears turning to a few thousand.

We finally arrived at the hospital and they rushed inside. I kissed her goodbye “I love you Andi.” I say hoping and praying that wouldn’t be the last time I seen her.

I turned to the waiting room and sat in the hard chairs… how could this day get any worse? I closed my eyes trying to tell myself that she would be ok. I tried and tried to fall asleep but my mind kept drifting back to Andi. Then everything stopped.

The doctor walked out with eyes so sad. “Wilson, Here for Andi.” He walked over to me and I seen a tear in his eye, “I’m so sorry, she didn’t make it. She lost too much blood and we lost her.” I fell to the ground in a ball. I had no self control left. The doctor tried to comfort me, but nothing worked. He walked away leaving me to deal with the loss of Andi. A while later I was still crying he walked back out. “Mr. Wilson is everything alright?”

“No!” I stuttered. He stopped and stared.

“I am terribly sorry for you loss Luke.”

I stopped crying and stared up at him. “How do you know my name? I never told anyone!”

He looked at the ground. And directed towards the room Andi had been taken to. “That was one of the last words she said.” He glanced up at me. “She said….in the weakest voice I’ve ever heard…. I love Luke,”

I woke up with tears in my eyes, thank you, it was just a nightmare! She could still be ok!!

The doctor walked out with eyes so sad, like In my dream and said the exact same thing. “Wilson here for Andi.” I took a deep breath preparing for him to tell me she was gone forever, she died a young age, but there was nothing they could have done to save her; she just lost too much blood. But instead. “She made it...” is what I hear.

I can’t help but smile. “Thank you so much! Can I see her?” he would never know my level of gratitude for saving her life.

He merely nodded his head and directed me towards her room. I walked in and my heart started pounding in my ear at the sight I was seeing. I walked over to the bed and kissed her forehead. “Can she come home today?”

The doctor shook his head. “No, sorry. I’m afraid she is being put on suicide watch for the next 24 hours, because clearly this was no accident. Is there any way I can contact her parents?”

I looked at her. What would she want? She wouldn’t want her dad to know about this. But sometimes you have to do what is best for them instead of what they want. “Yes. Do you have a phone I can use? I can call her father and tell him she is here.”

He nodded his head and pointed in the hall. “Right there.”

I nodded my head back at him and picked up the phone dialing her father’s cell phone number.

Not available. Leave a message.
I waited for the beep and started to speak. “Hey it’s Luke. I’m at the Beaver Valley hospital with Andi. She’s here; if you want to know more then come. If you don’t care then delete the message. Bye.”
Andi.
What the fuck was this? What are those called? An out of body experience? …No no this wasn’t making any sense… I can’t be dead…. I mean I’m lying right there on the bed breathing… What the fuck!? I see that my suicide attempt was yet again another fail…. Fuck….! Guess ima have to give it another try as soon as I got out of here. If I do...

Someone just walked in. Luke? How did he know…? Wait what the fuck was going on?? I’m so confused….he touched my hand!! And I could feel it…. what the hell?

“Andi… I know you can’t hear me and you don’t want to see me, and if you could you would probably murder me…. I’m so sorry
About all of this and I blame myself 100%. This all started with me cheating with Becca… Then with Maddie…. Then we break up…… we get together and break up again….. I get with Karli and it kills you every time you seen us together… then you got with Aiden and I was so jealous it burned me inside….. I broke up with Karli before I left to chase after you. I don’t like her…. I don’t love her….. I don’t even want her.”

I could feel tears coming. Why can’t I wake up and tell him I love him to? I don’t want to watch him blame himself and I hate seeing him cry. Please Wake Up!!! I don’t like anything about this….

I watched him as he lied beside me and held me in his arms. He kissed my forehead. I wish I was there so he knew I didn’t blame him….. Please…. I need to wake up.

Whoa…. Was that my mom? I could see someone standing directly ahead of me. But she was dead wasn’t see? And I wasn’t… was i?

“Hey baby.” She spoke with a smile that would light up the whole room.

“Mom?” I couldn’t help but start to cry.

“Ya Andi, it’s me.” I ran to her arms and cried.

“Mom, I’m so confused… what’s going on??? Am I dead?”

“She kissed my forehead.” Baby I have been watching over you. And you have made mistakes but everyone has. I have made mistakes…. But this is one of the most important descions you are ever going to make.”

She smiled at me. “What descion momma?”

“Whether you come back with me; or you go home….” She inclined her head towards me lying there in the hospital bed. “You see that boy? He’s made mistakes Andi, but no mistakes should ever bring you to the result of suicide. I know I can’t talk much because clearly I did just that. But he needs you. And I need you. But your daddy needs you.”

“Dad doesn’t care.” I started to cry.

“Dad’s made mistakes to, when he was beating you….. When he was drinking… he’s no saint… but everyone can change.”

“When he was beating me!?? I should just forgive him for beating the shit out of me?!? And return to this hell hole!? That people call life?”

She nodded her head. “Andi… Luke needs you. Even when he was with Karli, he never let you go. Because he couldn’t because he needs you.”

I looked back towards him and smiled. “Ok. I want to go back to him.”

I opened my eyes and I could see Luke staring down at me with tears in his eyes. “Luuu-kk-e?” I managed to finally speak.

“Andi!?!” he kissed my forehead. “Are you ok???”
“Define ok.”

He smiled. “Ya… I was scared I was going to lose you…”

I moved my hand with great effort and set it on the side of his face. “Don’t worry… I’m here.”

He smiled a smile that didn’t quite match his look. “That’s what you’ve always said….. I was so close to losing you Andi, and I couldn’t bear it.”

I kissed him, “this time I promise.”

“ok.” the sparkle returned in his eyes.

“Am I allowed to go home?” I asked glancing at the door.

He shook his head. “No. 24 hour suicide watch.”

i glared at the doctor with his back faced towards us out in the hall. “Fine.”

Luke looked into my eyes. “I’ll be here the whole time; nothing will pull me away,”

I laid down and yawned. “Good. Now come lay with me.”

He laughed and squeezed on the bed beside me. “Yes. Ma’am.”

I smiled.

He turned towards me and wrapped his arms around me with his face getting serious. “Please Andi, promise me you will never go and do anything like that ever again. When I thought I lost you, I was about to go die myself. I told you… you jump I jump too...”

I took a deep breath. “I love you Luke.”

He laid back down. “I love you too Andi.”

“Butterflies.” Was the last thing I said before I fell into a deep sleep.

Luke.

“Andi are you ready to go?” 24 hours later and she was cleared to go home.

She nods her head. “Ya.”

I smiled at her, “ok lets go.” I grab her hand and pull her out of the hospital room. We agreed she would stay with me for awhile since her dad didn’t even care enough to make sure she was ok the night of the accident. He never answered the phone. He never called to ask if everything was alright.

We got to her house. We were going to get some of her clothes together for her stay at my house. She grabbed 5 pairs of neon colored skinny jeans. Pink, green, blue, yellow, and purple. 3 sticks of eyeliner. Damn… Who had that much eyeliner? Actually I lost track of all the make up she grabbed. I seen the eyeliner, some eye shadow, mascara, crème. Ya I don’t know what else there was. And a couple of band T shirts. Including the asking Alexandria one I had given to her. She threw it all in a bag and then grabbed my penguin.

“Oh I see, I’m not good enough for you, so you need to replace me with MY penguin.”

She smiled a smile I hadn’t seen for awhile. “It’s not that. I just don’t want your penguin to get lonely, being here all alone.”

I pulled her in for a tight hug. “Fine but your mine.”

She nodded her head and giggled.

We walked out the door and she grabbed my hand and squeezed it tight. I let go of her hand and interlocked our fingers. I glanced up at her and smiled.

We got to my house and she threw her bag on my bed. “…..Luke….” she took a deep breath and I looked over at her. “I…. want to go to the edge. “

I sighed but kissed her and nodded my head. “Ok….” she kissed me back but that didn’t erase my worry.

We got to the edge and sat directly in front of the fall. I sat beside her and tightened my grip on her hand. If she jumped, I would jump. “I ran here to escape all the pain. I didn’t know what I would do…. I was sure that this would be the last time I would breathe. At first I was going to jump, and then I was going to cut. I wasn’t sure which to do. I just wanted it to be over. I think it was fate that I didn’t jump. I think I knew if I jumped they’re wouldn’t even be a chance for me to survive….so I cut instead half hoping someone would find me before it was too late.” She stood up and walked over to where her body had been laying. “I sat here glancing over at the entrance. Hoping that you would appear out of now where and stop me. When you didn’t I took that as a sign, to go on. It all happened so fast, I cut deep and I lost blood fast. You arrived right before I passed out. I tried