Her Love Fades... by Kerry Boo.. (books suggested by bill gates TXT) 📕

“Babe, I am fine.”

He shook his head. “No; Andi you need to eat something. Whether it be a little snack or a giant meal.”

I started to protest and he put his finger to my lips to hush me. “Don’t waste your breath baby girl.

He hooked his arms onto me and pulled me towards the kitchen, opening the cabinet. “What do you hunger for tonight?”

I smirked and grabbed a hold of him. “you.” He winked and pulled me back into his room.

I opened my eyes and felt the other side of the bed, according to my memory; Luke should be sitting there with a big ass smile on his face… what the hell…? Where was he? I grabbed my phone and decided to give him a call.

“Hey Luke.” “Andi” his voice was cold. I took a sharp intake of breath “Is everything ok?” I could almost hear him rolling his eyes. “Everything is fucking perfect! My ex tries to kill herself, and you know who the reason is?? Me, I am the reason and if you would have died I would have had to live with that guilt pounding at my head!”I took a deep breath. Ex? I thought to myself… I finally realized it was all a dream after I tried killing myself… The rest was a dream. I wasn’t back with Luke, I wasn’t unbroken... He may not be with Karli anymore… But it’s Luke; He’ll have another girl in a day… Who was I to think…..? I was really worth his time? I sniffled back tears and whispered goodbye to him, I could hear him start to object before I pushed end and had a breakdown.

I was still Andi Still didn’t have the one I needed, he still didn’t love me enough...And I was still alone…

My phone started ringing and it was a number I didn’t recognize, One that I had never before seen “hello?”

Luke
Andi called me, and I totally snapped. I felt horrible about it, and I wish I could take every part of it back… But before I had a chance to she hung up on me. I don’t blame her to do that…. I understand completely because I would have done the same thing to her, but it’s not fair, that all I ever do is hurt her, I’m a mess up and she’s amazing…. And I hate myself. But… that doesn’t mean what I said wasn’t true, because it was. Every part of it was…. Everything good that happens is a dream. So smile about it… And then wake up. Just makes everything easier I guess.

In frustration I threw my phone on the floor. It didn’t smash open like I had hoped it would. Oh well. Guess that’s a good thing in a little way. Oh who am I kidding? I want the bitch to smash!
I took a deep breath and tried to calm down; this was not good for my asthma. I walked out of my house and turned towards the park. That sat across from the tree staring out our names, they fit so perfectly together on the tree, and they looked so cute. Like it was our love story.

I wanted Andi to be a part of my story; I wanted her to have the best part… But if I can’t stop hurting her when all she is, is my friend… Then how can I not hurt her when she is my baby girl again? I’ve hurt her to many times, made too many mistakes and she could just brush them off and forgive me. The front door slammed shut and my father was stomping his way in the house, was he drunk, or pissed?

He threw a piece of paper at me, but It landed 2 feet in front of me. He turned and stalked out of my room where I could hear him plop his ass on the couch. Literally just plopped. Picked his feet up and fell backwards.

I stood up and reached towards the paper straining to read the small words. Basically I just read the part that said I needed a checkup. I called the number on the paper, because my dad wasn’t going to. “Hello I’m Jenny thank you for calling how may I help you?” “I received a paper, stating I was due for a checkup, When can you get me in?” “Your name?” “Luke Wilson.” “Oh Luke, How’s your dad?” “Fine, when can you have me in by?” “Tomorrow at 9:00 if you don’t mind missing your classes?” “Ya Sure, I really don’t care. Ill be there.” She started to say goodbye
but I ended the call before she could finish.

I lay in my bed and closed my eyes, after maybe an hour I drifted off to sleep. I woke up at 6:30 to my alarm buzzing, I got up and threw on my bring me the horizon shirt, black converse, and blue skinny jeans. I straightened my hair, grabbed my books and started walking to school. I walked over to the steps and sat there with my head in my knees.

“Luke…Luke Wilson, why so sad?” I looked up and got a glance of my best friend Maddie.

“Why not be sad? There’s nothing to be happy about anymore….” She reached over and gave me a hug.

“Why isn’t there? There are at least 5 girls looking over at you wishing you would ask them out.” I followed her fingers and searched for the one face I knew wouldn’t be there.

“I don’t care Maddie, I don’t want any of them, they’re all sluts.” That comment earned me a slap to the back of the head.

“Ow! What the fuck Maddie!?” I shot a glare at her and she giggled.

“Luke, those are some of my best friends, and they are not sluts. I know that Raena really likes you… Why don’t you go give it a try with her? Please Luke…”

I looked at the ground and gulped. “You don’t understand it Maddie, I don’t want any other girl besides Andi.”

She puckered her lips in anger. “Luke you can’t fucking have andi! You messed the fuck up with her!!! Besides why would you want a fucking slut!? Because that’s all Andi is!!!”

“What are you talking about?”

“She was caught under the covers with Wayne, made out with him, dated Aiden behind you back, kissed Becca. Made out with Alec, Oh and messed around with autumn. And flirt around more than I do. This was all while you were with her. She’s just a helpless little slut, whose way too good at the lying game.”

I could feel the tears threating to escape. I bit my tongue. I stood up and walked over to Raena. “Hey Raena, I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go out?”

She glanced up at me and smiled. “Sure Luke can’t wait.”

“Ok” I forced a smile and walked into the building. What did I just do? I thought to myself I don’t even know Raena…. I spotted Andi walking with my old best friend, Jeff… Maybe she really was a slut… I mean… Maddie would never lie about something like that….i looked straight past her and fought back more tears, She was too busy laughing and smiling with Jeff, To realize I was having a mental break down.

The first few hours of school had gone by fast; I stood up in the middle of my class and started to walk out the door when the teacher stopped me. “Luke, where do you think you’re going?”

I looked over at him and glared. “I have a doctor’s appointment.” It was a substitute Mr., Sumel. So he didn’t care, he nodded his head and turned back to his phone.

I got up and arrived at the doctor’s office, “So Luke, have you had any chest pains lately?” I shook my head remembering all those times I had pains in my chest, where I thought I was about to die… But hell, he doesn’t need to know that.

“Goooooood.” He checked my weights, height, heart, my ears, my reflexes, and gave me flu shots. When I was getting ready to sneak out of the building he walked in. “Luke I found something, I don’t know what it is… I think you need to go to the hospital and get it checked out.” He handed me a piece of paper. “As soon as you can.” I nodded my head, and was getting ready to leave. “Oh Luke, and if he asks you if you have had any chest pains, don’t lie.”
I gulped hard and left the building.

Andi
Haven’t seen Luke all day, xept for earlier when I was walking with Jeff, I didn’t want to, he kind of tricked me into it…. And I was too nice to say, Yo dude! Back the fuck up.
School was finally over for today, I started to walk home, what was on the list today? Go home. I threw myself on my bed and lay down. Thinking back to the conversation I had with that women yesterday.

…..is this andi? Yes and you are? I am your mom? I remember shaking my head and yelling no, no my mom is dead, so committed suicide. The women pressed on and on, talking about meeting me, saying how no the women I thought was my mother honestly wasn’t I was adopted… and my real mother was on the other end of the phone with my real mother.

I glanced up as my ‘dad’ walked in.

…..”Dad can I ask you something?” he sighed and nodded his head.
“What Andi…?”

“Some lady called me and told me that her name was Cassidy, and she was my real mother…?”

I heard him take a sharp intake of breath.”She’s lying Andi, now no more about this, I am your father and that woman is not your mother….” He waved at the air like he was trying to push our conversation away.

I picked up my phone when he left the room and called the women back. “So you say you’re my mom and my dad lives there with you, where as the person I have been told is my father since I was baby tells me that you are not my mother… my mother killed herself and he is indeed my father. Dilemma dilemma of who I am supposed to believe. The person who treats me like shit, or the person I don’t fucking know.” Before she could get another word in I hung up.

I laid back in my bed, it was earlier.. But all I wanted was to escape all my problems and sleep my life away. I closed my eyes and grabbed Luke’s penguin to cuddle up to it. And fell asleep instantly.

There was no peace in my dream; there was no peace in my world. When I closed my eyes, bad thoughts over loaded my head, when I had then open, Bad thoughts were in front of me, staring at me telling me to try again and this time I wouldn’t be saved.

When I woke up I felt like shit, I knew already it was going to be a bad day. I slipped on a skull long sleeve shirt, black skinny jeans and some furry boots. I brushed all the knots out of my hair, put on my blue eyeliner and grabbed my ‘Emo is love’ bag. I walked out the door and arrived at school shivering I walked past Maddie and she glared at me. I tried not pay attention and kept walking;