The Arabian Nights Entertainments by Anonymous (best books to read .txt) 📕

The disparity between Bedreddin and the hump-backed groom, who made such a horrible figure, occasioned a great murmuring among the company, insomuch that the ladies cried out, We must give our bride to this handsome young gentleman, and not to this ugly hump-back. Nor did they rest here, but uttered imprecations against the sultan, who, abusing his absolute power, would unite ugliness and beauty together. They also upbraided the bridegroom, and put him quite out of countenance, to the great satisfaction of the spectators, whose shouts for some time put a stop to the concert of music in the hall. At last the musicians began again, and the women who had dressed the bride came round her. Each time she changed her habit, she rose up from her seat, followed by her bride-women, and passed by Hump-back without giving him one look; but went towards Bedreddin, before whom she presented herself in her new attire. On this occasion Bedreddin, according to the instructions given him by the genius, failed not to put his hand in his purse, and pulled out handfuls of sequins, which he distributed among the women that followed the bride; nor did he forget the players and dancers, but also threw money to them. They showed themselves very thankful, and made signs that the young bride should be for him, and not for the hump-back fellow. The women who attended her told her the same thing, and did not care whether the groom heard them or not; for they put a thousand tricks upon him, which very much pleased the spectators.

The ceremony of changing habits being over, the musicians ceased and went away, but made a sign to Bedreddin Hassan to stay behind. The ladies did the same, and went all home, except those belonging to the house. The bride went into a closet, whither her women followed to undress her, and none remained in the hall but the hump-back groom, Bedreddin, and some of the domestics. Hump-back, who was furiously mad at Bedreddin, suspecting him to be his rival, gave him a cross look, and said, And thou, what dost thou wait for? Why art thou not gone as well as the rest? Begone. Bedreddin, having no pretence to stay, withdrew, not knowing what to do with himself. But he had not got out of the porch, when the genius and the fairy met and stopped him. Whither art thou going? said the fairy; stay, for Hump-back is not in the hall, but has gone out about some business; you have nothing to do but to return, and introduce yourself into the bride's chamber: As soon as you are alone with her, tell her boldly that you are her husband; that the sultan's intention was only to make sport with the groom; and, to make this pretended bridegroom some amends, you had caused to be prepared for him, in the stable, a good dish of cream: Then tell her all the fine things you can think of to persuade her, for, with your handsomeness, little persuasion will do, and she will think herself happy in being deceived so agreeably. In the mean time we shall take care that Hump-back return not, and let nothing hinder you from passing the night with your bride, for she is yours.

While the fairy thus encouraged Bedreddin, and instructed him how he should behave himself, Hump-back was really gone out of the room; for the genius went to him in the shape of a great cat, miauling at a most fearful rate: The fellow called to the cat, and clapped his hands to make her flee; but, instead of that, the cat stood upon her hind feet, staring with her eyes like fire, looking fiercely at him, miauling louder than she did at first, and growing bigger, till she was as large as an ass. At this sight Hump-back would have cried out for help, but his fear was so great that he stood gaping, and could not utter one word. That he might have no time, however, to recover, the genius changed himself immediately into a large buffalo, and in this shape called to him with a voice that redoubled his fear, Thou hump-backed villain! At these words the affrighted groom cast himself on the ground, and covering his face with his gown, that he might not see this dreadful beast, Sovereign prince of buffaloes, said he, what is it you want with me? Woe be to thee, replies the genius, hast thou the boldness to venture to marry my mistress? O my lord, said Hump-back, I pray you to pardon me; if I am guilty, it, is through ignorance; I did not know that this lady had a buffalo for her sweetheart: Command me in any thing you please; I give you my oath that I am ready to obey you. By death, replied the genius, if thou goest out from hence, or speakest a word till the sun rises, I will crush thy head to pieces; but then I give thee leave to go from hence: I warn thee to hasten, and not to look back; but if thou hast the impudence to return, it shall cost thee thy life. When the genius had done speaking, he transformed himself into the shape of a man, took Hump-back by the legs, and after having set him against the wall, with his head downwards, If thou stir, said he, before the sun rises, as I have told thee already, I will take thee by the heels again, and dash thy head in a thousand pieces against the wall.

To return to Bedreddin: Being prompted by the genius and the presence of the fairy, he got into the hall again, from whence he slipped into the bride-chamber, where he sat down expecting the success of his adventure. After a while the bride arrived, conducted by an old matron, who came no further than the door, exhorting the bridegroom to do his duty like a man, without looking to see if it was Hump-back or another; she then locked the door, and retired. The young bride was mightily surprised, instead of Hump-back to find Bedreddin Hassan, who came up to her with the best grace in the world. What! my dear friend, said she, by your being here at this time of night, you must be my husband's comrade? No, madam, said Bedreddin, I am of another sort of quality than that ugly hump-back. But, said she, you do not consider that you speak degradingly of my husband. He your husband, madam? replied he; can you retain these thoughts so long? Be convinced of your mistake, madam, for so much beauty must never be sacrificed to the most contemptible of mankind: It is I, madam, that am the happy mortal for whom it is reserved. The sultan had a mind to make himself merry by putting this trick upon the vizier your father, but he chose me to be your real husband. You might have observed how the ladies, the musicians, the dancers, your women, and all the servants of your family, were pleased with this comedy. I have sent that hump-back fellow to his stable again, where he is just now eating a dish of cream; and you may rest assured that he will never appear any more before you.

At this discourse, the vizier's daughter, who was more like one dead than alive when she came into the bride-chamber, put on a gay air, which made her so handsome that Bedreddin was perfectly charmed with her. I did not expect, said she, to meet with so pleasing a surprise, and had condemned myself to live unhappy all my days; but my good fortune is so much the greater, as I possess in you a man that is worthy of my tenderest affection. Having spoken thus, she undressed herself, and stepped into bed. Bedreddin, overjoyed to see himself possessor of so many charms, made haste to follow her, and laid his clothes upon a chair, with a bag that he got from the Jew, which, notwithstanding all the money he pulled out, was still full. He likewise threw off his turban, and put on a night-cap that had been ordered for Hump-back, and so went to bed in his shirt and drawers[Footnote: All the eastern nations lie in their drawers; but this circumstance will serve Bedreddin in the sequel.]; the latter were of blue satin, tied with a lace of gold. Whilst the two lovers were asleep, the genius, who had met again with the fairy, says to him, That it was high time to finish what was begun, and hitherto so successfully carried on; then let us not be overtaken by day-light, which will soon appear; go you, and bring off the young man again without awaking him. The fairy went into the bed-chamber where the two lovers were fast asleep, and took up Bedreddin just as he was, that is to say, in his shirt and drawers, and, in company with the genius, with a wonderful swiftness flew away with him to the gates of Damascus in Syria, where they arrived when the officer of the mosques, appointed for that end, was calling the people to come to prayers at break of day. The fairy laid Bedreddin softly on the ground, and, leaving him close by the gate, departed with the genius. The gate of the city being opened, and a great many people assembled to get out, they were mightily surprised to see Bedreddin lying in his shirt and drawers upon the ground. One said, He has been so hard put to it to get away from his mistress, that he had not time to put on his clothes. Look ye, says another, how people expose themselves; sure enough he has spent the most part of the night in drinking with his friends, till he has got drunk, and then perhaps, having occasion to go out, instead of returning, is come this length, and, not having his senses about him, was overtaken with sleep. Others were of different opinions; but nobody could guess the occasion of his being there. A small puff of wind happening to blow at the time, uncovered his breast, which was whiter than snow. Every one, being struck with admiration at the fineness of his complexion, spoke so loud as to awake him. His surprise was as great as theirs, when he found himself at the gate of a city where he had never been before, and encompassed by a crowd of people gazing at him. Gentlemen, said he, for God's sake tell me where I am, and what you would have of me. One of the crowd said to him, Young man, the gates of the city were just now opened, and, as we came out, we found you lying here in this condition, and stood to look on you: Have you lain here all night? and do you not know that you are at one of the gates of Damascus? At one of the gates of Damascus! answered Bedreddin; sure you mock me: When I lay down to sleep last night, I was at Cairo. When he said these words, some of the people, moved with compassion for him, said, It is a pity such a handsome young man should have lost his senses; and so went away. My son, says an old gentleman to him, you know not what you say: How is it possible that you, being this morning at Damascus, could be last night at Cairo? It is true for all that, said Bedreddin; for I swear to you that I was all yesterday at Balsora. He had no sooner said these words, than all the people fell into a fit of laughter, and cried out, He is a fool, he is a madman. There were some, however, who pitied him because of his youth; and one among the company said to him, My son, you must certainly be crazed; you do not consider what you say; how is it possible that a man could yesterday be at Balsora, the same night at Cairo, and next morning at Damascus? Sure you are asleep still; come, rouse up your spirits. What I say, answered Bedreddin, is so true, that last night I was married in the city of Cairo. All those that laughed before could not forbear laughing again when he said so. Recollect yourself, says the same person that spoke before; you have dreamed all this, and that fancy still possesses your brain. I am sensible of what I say, answered the young man: Pray can you tell me how it was possible to go in a dream to Cairo, where I am very certain I was in person, and where my bride was seven times brought before me, each time dressed in a different habit, and where