In Me by Tiffany Anyel (best android ereader .TXT) 📕

okay.” “Good. The reason I am calling is I’d like to ask you out—to spend some time with you,” Paul clears his throat.

“Umm... Yea sure I’d like that. When?” “Well I was hoping for sooner rather than later—do you have plans tonight?”

Okay pause: On the one hand Yes! this is my opportunity to let go, be free—stop hiding. And do it with a really cute guy on top of that. But I had also not dated or even just went out with anyone (besides Lee) in a long time. Long enough to know I was so not ready.

Sitting on my bed I had to make a decision. I hear Paul clear his throat, “Hello Kate are you still there?”

Realizing I had literally paused in the middle of our conversation I take a breath saying, “Yes I’m here. And no I have no plans tonight.”

After deciding where to go and a time we hang up. Shit! I am so nervous and I still have almost an hour to kill. I hear a knock on my door. Who the hell?

Walking to the door I see Lee’s silhouette--great. I open the door.

“Well

?” I finally asked after standing in the doorway for at least five minutes with Lee staring at me with an expression on his face—to be honest I had never seen until now. I didn’t know what to make of it.

Moving out of the door I motion with my hands, “Are you going to come in—or stand there looking at me all night? Because believe it or not I have plans tonight.”

Lee finally walks in shutting the door.

“So?” I say crossing my arms over my chest standing in the middle of the room. Still mad at him for last night—I wasn’t in the mood to be nice.

“I tried calling you—a lot today,” Lee said.

“Yea well I’ve been out all day and to be honest didn’t feel like talking to anyone.” Meaning you

.

Knowing what I meant Lee replied, “Kate I’m so sorry about last night. Jenn well—was just being Jenn. And I…was being the ‘best boyfriend’—that unfortunately made me the crappiest friend. And I’m sorry about that—you do know that right? I know your upset with me but you know I didn’t--couldn’t intentionally hurt you, right?”

Rolling my eyes I let out a sigh, “Yea I know.” I smile dropping my fixed pose. It was hard to stay mad at Lee—we knew each other so well it didn’t take much to understand—and therefore forgive the other.

“But I’m still mad at you.” I say more for kicks than actual anger.

“I know. I’m kind of mad at me too.” Lee said finally smiling.

Following me to my bedroom and sitting in a chair looking at me run around the room picking up outfit after outfit he finally asked, “So what plans do you have tonight?”

Startled I stop in place looking at him, “Oh umm, Paul actually.” “Paul from last night, Paul?”

“Yea that same one,” smiling I continue, “He just called so…yea I’m going out. And before you say it, yea I know—‘me going out’.”

Expecting one of his quick come-backs something like: ‘has hell frozen over and I just didn’t get the memo?’ something funny so we both laugh. He looks down smiling.

“Are you okay?” Looking up at me I watch his eyes as they travel up my body finally meeting mine, “So is this what you’re wearing?”

And realizing for the first time since he knocked on my door—what I was wearing I pause. Okay it’s no big deal—it’s Lee. His definitely seen me in worse. But I still couldn’t help but feel a little naked—okay a lot naked standing there in what I had on.

I had never paid too much attention to what I wore—mostly because now I knew I hid behind it. And Lee—well this was a first for him too seeing me so out

in the open—literally out. Probably the most out I’ve been—ever.

I walk to the bathroom putting on a robe, “No. I was just trying it on.”

Looking at my scattered room he smiles saying, “You finally went shopping I see.” “Yea it was time.”

I walk over picking up a less revealing but still quite sexy outfit, “So, what do you think about this?”

Sitting back in his seat, with an intense concentrated look, Lee finally said “I’m pretty sure Paul will like it.”

"Are you sure you're okay?" He nods his head. Choosing to drop it--for now. I look at him saying,“Okay I’m going to try it on. Just know I have no idea what I’m going for at least when it comes to what to wear. So you have to be serious and honest with me okay?”

Lee brings his hand up crossing his chest. I take a breath walking into the bathroom.

After ten minutes of trying to get out—and get in to an outfit I slowly walk to the door. Okay I can do this

. You have nothing to hide—you’re beautiful. And it’s Lee

. But for some reason knowing that--made me even more nervous.

Shaking it off I open the door, Lee was reading a book from one of the shelves, I clear my throat getting his attention.

I wanted to say something funny—I needed to calm my nerves and laughing seemed like the best bet. Plus I have never been too big on attention—even when I ask for it. So I do a nervous twirl saying, “What do you think?”

Hearing a knock we both turn our heads, “That must be Paul—oh my god. I’m not even ready yet! Lee will you be a doll and entertain him for a while?”

Lee rolling his eyes gives me a you’re-joking-right? look, cheesing I say, “Please Lee, for me?” He sighs getting up to answer the door.

I quickly grab my new boots and run into the bathroom shutting the door. I go to the mirror taking out my hair band (that I always wore).

Watching my dark curls tumble as they fell to my shoulders—I run my fingers through it. I should let my hair down more often—it made me look exotic and matched with my ‘jaded’ eyes—quite sexy even.

Realizing that’s probably why I wore it up most of the time—I give it one last fluff and put on some lip gloss. No turning back now.

I give myself one last glance in the mirror putting on my boots. I open the door walking to the living room. I see Lee and Paul trying to make conversation.

Breaking up the obvious

awkwardness between them I finally turn to Paul saying, “Hey.” Realizing I was in the room they both turned to look at me.

“So you ready to go?” I ask trying to deflect some of the attention away from me as two sets of equally gorgeous eyes looked me up and down. Paul’s bright sky blue as he stood there smiling in direct contrast with Lee’s usually chocolate ‘sweet’ brown that now looked intensely dark as he looked away.

“Yes I am, if you are.” Paul finally said turning toward me. I give Lee a confused look. Did he not like what I was wearing? He looked upset. Paul clears his throat. And realizing I had totally forgotten he was in the room--oops. I turn to him smiling, “Yea I’m ready, I mean if you are.” "Yes, lets go."

Walking toward them Lee asks “Kate can I have my keys?” “Oh, yea I almost forgot—they’re on the kitchen table.” Lee walks to the kitchen and Paul smiling says, “You look lovely.”

“Thanks,” I smile looking down as Lee walked passed us opening the door, “I’ll talk to you later okay.”

Startled I look up saying, “Oh okay. Umm…well thanks for—helping me out earlier.” “Anytime. I’ll see you later,” Lee said not stopping as he walked out the door.

I didn’t even have time to stop him before he was already at his car--getting in. What was with him??

Unfortunately we didn’t have time to do our normal catch up tonight. Maybe something happened. I made a mental note to ask Lee what was up later.

Locking the door Paul and I step out walking to his car. “So where are we going again?” “I thought we’d check out this new place I’ve heard good things about. Supposedly they serve the ‘best of everything’” Paul said smiling as he started the car.

Looking out the window—taking a silent breath I watch as my red front door faded from view. Here goes…

The Confidence in me

“Is that everything?” Paul asked as he a stuffed another bag in the trunk.

“Yea I think that’s it.” I do another round of check marks in my head making sure I wasn’t leaving anything I may need on our trip.

It had been three weeks since our ‘first date'. And last week he asked if I would like to spend some time at his vacation home (on the beach) for some R&R. Needless to say my response was: Yes Please! So here we were on the road driving to what I hoped would be a weekend in Paradise.

“I invited some friends to come along—but I don’t know if they will show. They never rsvp’d to let me know,” Paul said grabbing my hand holding it as we turned off the highway: Paradise only 20 miles ahead.

Smelling the salt water I roll down my window—getting a whiff. I look at Paul, “How many friends did you invite?”

“Oh only two, I told them they could bring some friends with them if they wanted.”

Thinking either I was in for a ‘cramped’ weekend or his place had to be much bigger than I thought I ask, “So how big is this place?”

Looking in the rear-view mirror Paul smiled glancing at me, “Big enough. We won’t be on top of each other if that’s what you were thinking.”

I knew Paul—let’s just say was on the upper-end of the Money-Totem-Pole. But he never boasted or bragged he was rather quite modest about his ‘life-style’ which I admired about him.

Driving down a really long bridge we pass over part of the beautiful blue ocean. Jumping out of my seat every two seconds pointing at everything I saw from sea gulls to yachts—and pulling into the residential area with houses--no mansions that I’m pretty sure I’ve seen on TV somewhere Paul turns to me smiling, “You’re so