Johnny & I : The Island by Daria Paus (hardest books to read txt) 📕

The bedroom was the last room I checked. When I pushed the door open and saw him sitting on his king-sized bed, shirt opened and chest heaving from deep breaths, my own breath caught in my throat. I swallowed.

"Why are you doing this?”

His head snapped up and his eyes widened as he saw me.

"Please," he said. “Bree, I—"

"You can't just leave me like that." The tone of my voice stunned me. Where did I find the courage to speak like this? I didn't recognize my own voice.

He closed his eyes as if looking at me was too much to handle. "Just go. Give me a moment."

"But—"

"Get out." His voice was just a growl.

"Seriously?"

He didn't even look at me, and for some reason it annoyed me more than the words he'd spoken.

"Asshole." I slammed the door, muttering to myself as I stomped down the corridor.

10

Head over heels

I sat on the sofa, rolling a lock of hair between my fingers as he came toward me. I turned to look at him, letting the hair fall back into place.

“I’m—"

I got to my feet, intending to leave the room.

"I'm sorry, don't go."

I stopped and masked myself with self-control as I glared up at his face. Then I shook my head. "I can't do this." It was too much. He was too much, or too little. I didn't know anymore. He was like a rollercoaster, one which I couldn't allow myself to ride no matter how tempting it was.

"I shouldn't have—" His voice broke. “Bree I’m—"

"No!" I snapped. "You shouldn't; you know what, you're rude and… ”

“An asshole?" He suggested.

My cheeks flushed. I'd said it out loud this time. I grimaced.

"I deserved that," he said.

I sighed, flinging my hands out in frustration. "Stay away from me."

I felt his eyes burn into my back as I walked away, but his footsteps didn’t follow. Had I expected it? Hoped for it? The feeling of disappointment made me pick up my pace, and as I slipped into the guest room I slammed the door harder than necessary. What the hell? My inner voice said. Have you lost your mind? I ignored it.

His face haunted me as I closed my eyes. How long could I stay away from him? Eventually, I'd have to leave this room. What was I supposed to say to him? Never in my wildest imagination had I thought our meeting would play out like this. Not that I’d actually thought I'd ever see him in real life. But in my daydreams, I’d pictured it in a million different ways, all in which the outcome was far better than the reality.

But this wasn't a dream. I was really here, stuck on an island with the number one sexiest man alive, and I couldn't decide whether I hated him—or loved him.

Hours crept by too slow, and when I’d grown bored out of my mind, a soft knock on the door made my heart leap.

"Bree?"

I hoped that if I remained silent he’d get the point and leave.

"Can I come in?"

I sighed.

"Please."

"Go away!"I didn't want to see him, didn't want to have my breath stolen and my heart racing. He'd turned my whole life upside down. I'd gone through a bigger range of feelings in these few days than what I usually dealt with in years. I couldn't deal with anything more.

The door slid open, and I briefly wondered why there were no locks on them.

"Can I come in?"

I looked down at my hands. "No."

He sighed. "I panicked, I’m—" He paused, sucking in a few deep breaths before continuing. “I want to stay away from you, but I can't."

I looked up, seeing him leaning against the doorframe, on the right side of the threshold.

He gave me a small smile and took my breath away all over again. I’d thought the absurd reactions wouldn’t last, but I had to admit I’d been wrong.

I caved and gestured for the empty space next to me on the bed. "Come."

He hesitated, then came to sit next to me.

A long silence fell between us as neither of us knew what to say. Finally, he spoke up.

"I promised myself to never go near a woman again."

His raw honesty made me gasp. It was so straightforward and so sudden—and the very last thing I'd expected to hear from him.

"I've been fucked too many times by women and their empty promises. I've had it."

I gulped, not sure I understood where he was going with this, and why he was telling me.

He looked at me, and I tried to fight the urge to look away. "You make it hard for me to keep that promise."

I could only stare.

"You're—" His voice broke and he looked down at his clasped hands. "I'm sorry, I used you."

A gasp flew from my mouth. That's what he was thinking? How could he be so blind? Wasn’t it obvious I wanted everything he was willing to give? And more.

For the first time since the kiss, I saw him in a new light. He wasn’t the kind of guy who I, for a while, had imagined him to be, and hated him for. He was just like the rest of us. Deeply bruised by a bunch of people who we regretted letting into our lives. The ones who promised us the world and then ripped it to pieces in front of our eyes. I'd been so wrapped up in my own hurt feelings I'd totally missed the point. But thinking of it now, it made sense. I’d seen the headlines, the tabloids. I knew the things he'd gone through, the bad breakups, the betrayals, the ugliness of the female sex. I’d read the gossip and felt bad for the man, but I never saw it for what it truly was. Cuts so deep they never truly healed. Bruises, faded but still hurting years after the initial blow.

His voice brought me back to the moment. "It will not happen again."

"No!" I blurted and he