Be Lonely, Be Your Best by Santosh Jha (good books to read for 12 year olds TXT) 📕

intangible about this natural emotion is derived from archetypal images framed in our minds since childhood and even before. Scientists say, it is now part of our neural wiring, our genetic makeup. Feeling in unity with surroundings is natural and this personally evolved emotion of association and related emotions of ideational belonging is what defines spiritualism. That is why spiritualism is always a very exclusively individual and never a collective identity or entity.

From the very definition of loneliness in contemporary societies, we can see that it is essentially an outcome of our failure to feel connected with our surroundings and everything small to big in ambient milieus, which in turn causes loneliness. The crucial mind-connect to find ourselves in unity and harmony of the milieus around us is missing. That disconnect, gap or void is causing the emotion of loneliness, especially in women.

Women in all cultures are more prone to loneliness emotions as this trouble of being connected is more innate in them. Science confirms that men have seven times more grey matter in their brains compared to women but women have nine times more white matter in their brains than men. This white matter is the connecting neurons. Both sides of woman’s brain are equally active, compared to predominant right part in men. That is why women always feel the need to stay connected, feel part of and in harmony with all elements in their ambient milieu, especially the intangibles. This is hugely missing. Clutter culture offers loads of tangible connects but the much valuable intangible connects are hugely missing. Why?

The feeling of disconnect and isolation is a corollary of the dualism, which we have discussed earlier. In contemporary clutter culture, we connect a lot, we try to align ourselves with everything but not with elements, which are real and simple. We live in a world, where most things are growingly becoming fake. We live in a world of high distrust. We connect with loads of things, which are only virtual, not real. Our brain is not designed to have connect with things, which has low emotional inputs. We live in a world, which is growingly becoming so big, so complex and so fake that it stands as something perceptibly impersonal. However, we have this innate need to personalize things. We are personalizing too much but deep inside our subconscious minds, we know and accept that all those things we are personalizing, are too low on intangibles – trust, emotional intimacy and actualism. Fake realism cannot give us this wellness of connect and assimilation. Loneliness is bound to prosper.

That is why it has to be emphasized here that we all need to reassess this connect we have. We need to be spiritual in a very different sense to re-find this lost connect. We have to unlearn the popular worldview about spiritualism. We need to accept spiritualism in sync with contemporary scientific mindset. This new Spiritual You has absolute freedom to formulate new questions about the popular worldview. The neo-spiritualism shall help you reposition, redesign and realign the old populist realism about spiritualism. This lost connect shall then be redeemed.

All new questions must lead to new answers, which ensure larger wellness and excellence of self, not as some individualistic, self-indulgent and self-gratifying entity, rather as an essential part of the larger global society. The collective wellness and excellence is one singular condition, which ensures wellness and excellence of all individuals.

The new spiritual you shall understand the basic mechanism of life-living realisms. Thousands of years back, religion and philosophy also provided us models and metaphors to understand the cosmic model as well as life-living realisms. However, they regressed to doubtful utility, because like all good ideals, they too became victim to human ingenuity and conveniences. Moreover, they could not update their models with changing times.

Science also provides models but ideal it is for the new spiritual you to opt a holistic, assimilative and integrative model, which accepts and combines all good and cherished ideals and models of all wisdoms – old or new. This shall be an ideal contemporary positioning for the neo spiritualist.

This new spiritualism should work out towards larger wellness of individual, society as well as larger worldview. Moreover, it should endow us with a thought-behaviour-action platform, which optimizes all processes of humanity and this world, enabling our potentials to reach a new high in peaceful coexistence.

Let us translate this holistic-assimilative-integrative model of new spiritualism in six core domains of life and living – Self, Family, Work, Society, World and Beyond Life. Each one of us can have our own subjective and personalized model of spiritualism. However, these models must ideally conform to and be in perfect symmetry with the holistic-assimilative-integrative model of new spiritualism, which is in sync with contemporary common sense.

When you design and evolve your own personalized and subjective spiritualism model, the core ideas of overall wellness and excellence must be retained and adhered to. The choices and priorities can be subjective and all the operative ideas, thoughts, behaviours and action can be designed suiting to personal requirements. However, the following notions must be part of any model we create: -

The core principle must always be holism, assimilation and integration of all wisdoms and knowledge of humanity and never ever reject anything out-rightly. There is always some utility in even the seemingly worst of futility. Always remember, one does not necessarily have to be wrong for another to be right. Coexistence is always better.

We have a mechanism and this body-mind mechanism must always be in perpetuity of poise and overall homeostasis. Your spiritual model must ensure bio-sociological, psychological, emotional, spiritual as well as volitional homeostasis.

The body-mind homeostasis or poise is largely a function of internal emotional stability, poise and positivity. Internal emotions are deeply affected by elements from our external environment, especially the ambient societal milieu. To minimize external disturbances to internal emotions, one must accept love, absolute intimacy and compassion as core elements of the spiritual model. This necessitates action-behavior benchmarks of nondiscrimination, tolerance and nonaggression, moderation and non-self-gratification as well as perpetuation of pursuits for knowledge and wisdom.

The higher consciousness is the ultimate personality positioning and to attain that, even spiritualism is only a transitional situation. This stage is reached with a receptive-mode consciousness, breaking free from the auto-mode reactive consciousness. The spiritualism model must work out for a life and living schedule, which allows quality lonely time for self and family.

Most importantly; if we see the larger picture and accept facts objectively, with whatever knowledge humanity has so far evolved and understood, we shall have to accept that all life on earth, including humans and its evolution is one huge random and multi-dimensional event-cyclicality. On the other hand, what we humans make out of it and charter our own ways for survival, purpose and excellence is another multi-dimensional cyclicality. Both forces, though inter-dependent only at the core and having some patterns, which can be replicable, still, they remain highly and intricately randomized. The element of unpredictability, inadvertence, accidentality and asymmetricality in both largely sovereign forces of the cosmos only ensures that humanity can never ever remain in perpetuity of singular purpose, peace and order. Especially in contemporary situation, when humanity long before evolved and acquired the criticality of conscious intelligence, which is bound to lead it to ever-growing entropy (degrading randomization) and ultimate extinction in the long run. Finding a purpose and purity of singular pattern or model of culture and virtuosity for global community seems out of question. The mechanism of cosmic realism never ever seems to allow it. It is more impossible now. The wise can only understand that and find its personalized and subjective peace. Anyone, who arrives at the higher consciousness of higher objectivity, can clearly unravel this mystery. That is why; spiritualism also needs to be very personalized and subjective. You have the genius in you and you can do it.

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Celebration Of Success Of Self-Control

And Happiness Of Loneliness

As I am about to begin the last chapter of the book and talk about happiness of loneliness, I am very optimistic about one eventuality. I very humbly believe that you have connected to me and my words in good trust and goodwill. This is important as what I need to say here now has utility and worth only when you accept them as. The words in the next few paragraphs are very personal and are about what I have internalized. I need your faith in them.

We have already shared before that if the hypothesis is right; the idea is accepted as right. If two people have an assimilative and integrative attitude, one can easily see that words travel well between them and meanings have larger and deeper utility. There is an unusual magnanimity of reception. Friendship is one positioning, where assimilation and integration about divergent hypotheses has larger accommodative space. A seed is more objectively accommodative in space than a grown up tree. Friendship is seed positioning.

That is why, I very affectionately request you to be my friend and accept the words below as one long conversation between friends. This, I am confident, shall engender smoothness of navigation and fruition of the entire exercise.

It is a heart-felt realization that our very worthy ancestors as well as many before me have already said almost all good things. What I can do is present them in new set of words with novelty of references. The only justification of me telling them is that all goodness and wellness ideas and words need to be repeated and retold, to add to their all-pervasiveness.

At the age of 48, I can say with innocence that getting old is such a beautiful and satisfying experience. It makes the self accept the utility and fruition of holistic, assimilative and integrative consciousness. Getting old has probably pushed me close to the eligibility of perhaps beginning to understand what essentially is there to be understood!

The wise have said, wisdom is what we internalize. I humbly say that what I share with you here is what I have internalized in my life. I believe you to believe me that all my previous 25 books have been humbly intended to be only this affectionate and compassionate sharing with you, what I have internalized.

Acceptance is the most difficult attainment in life. Luckily, it is an internalized process. We are not dependent on anybody or anything outside us to have this attainment of acceptance. The primary, the unequivocal and undeniable truth of life and living is loneliness. All of us come into this mortal world alone and have to go alone. This optionlessnes is some acceptance, hardest for we all. But then, there is no escape from the truth and realism. That is why the wise of all ages have insisted that mortality is our primary and ultimate wisdom, with which we need to live happily.

What essentially is happiness? This question comes first as we are talking about happiness of loneliness. There surely cannot be a singular definition. Happiness is not an objective, tangible, measurable entity. We cannot have an index system for that. However, after so much knowledge about our body-mind mechanism, we now know so much about what factors are associated with this very wide range of emotions called happiness. We surely know so much about consciousness, homeostasis and brain mechanism. This knowledge makes us stand in good stead in designing our happiness package. The artistry of happiness is in acceptance – acceptance of hardcore and objective realism and truth about life and living.

We all wish to be happy. We all are designed to be happy. But, happiness is not a static entity. There is a systematic cyclicality of consciousness, cognition and causality, which never allows happiness (even grief) to remain static and fixed. Our body-mind mechanism is designed in such a way and the external milieus too work in a way that happiness for us stands as a synthetic realism – this means, it is always evolving and changing in thesis-antithesis-synthesis