The Arabian Nights Entertainments by Anonymous (best books to read .txt) 📕

said, Once more, I pray you, my lord, come to bed again; why do you stand? He then stepped towards the bed, and said to her, Pray, madam, tell me, is it long since I left you? The question, answered she, surprises me. Did you not rise from me but now? Your thoughts are surely very busy. Madam, replied Bedreddin, I do assure you that my thoughts are not very easy. I remember, indeed, to have been with you; but I remember, at the same time, that I have since lived ten years at Damascus. Now, if I was actually in bed with you this night, I cannot have been from you so long; these two things are inconsistent. Pray tell me what to think; whether my marriage with you be an illusion, or whether my absence from you be only a dream, Yes, my lord, cried she; doubtless you were light-headed when you thought you were at Damascus. Upon this Bedreddin laughed heartily, and said, What a comical fancy is this! I assure you, madam, this dream of mine will be very pleasant to you. Do but imagine, if you please, that I was at the gate of Damascus in my shirt and drawers, as I am here now; that I entered the town with the halloo of a mob who followed and insulted me; that I fled into a pastry-cook's, who adopted me, taught me his trade, and left me all he had when he died; and that after his death I kept a shop. In fine, madam, I had a great number of other adventures too tedious to recount; and all I can say is, that it was not amiss that I awaked, for they were going to nail me to a stake. Oh, Lord, and for what (cried the lady, feigning astonishment) would they have used you so cruelly? You must certainly have committed some enormous crime. Not in the least, replied Bedreddin; it was nothing in the world but a mere trifle, the most ridiculous thing you can think of. All the crime I was charged with, was selling a cream-tart that had no pepper in it. As for that matter, said the beautiful lady, laughing heartily, I must say they did you great injustice. Ah, madam, replied he, that was not all; for this cursed cream-tart was every thing in my shop broken to pieces, and myself bound, fettered, and flung into a chest, where I lay so close, that methinks I am there still. In fine, a carpenter was sent for, and he was ordered to get ready a stake for me; but, thanks be to God, all these things are no more than a dream.

Bedreddin was not easy all night; he awaked from time to time, and put the question to himself, whether he dreamed or was awake. He distrusted his felicity; and to ascertain whether it was real or not, opened the curtains, and looked round the room. I am not mistaken, said he; this is the same chamber which I entered, instead of the hunch-backed groom of the stables, and am now in bed with the fair lady who was designed for him. Day-light, which then appeared, had not yet dispelled his uneasiness, when the vizier Schemseddin, his uncle, knocked at the door, and went to bid him good-morrow.

Bedreddin was extremely surprised to see, on a sudden, a man whom he knew so well, and who now appeared with a quite different air from that with which he pronounced the terrible sentence of death against him. Ah! cried Bedreddin, it was you who condemned me so unjustly to a manner of death the thoughts of which make me shrink still; and all for a cream-tart without pepper. The vizier laughed heartily; but, to put him out of suspense, told him how, by the ministry of a genius, (for Bossu's relation had made him suspect the adventure) he had been at his house, and had married his daughter instead of the sultan's groom of the stables; he then acquainted him that he had discovered him to be his nephew by a book written by the hand of Noureddin Ali, and, pursuant to that discovery, had gone from Cairo to Balsora in quest of him. My dear nephew, added he, with embraces and all the marks of tenderness, I ask your pardon for all I have made you undergo since I discovered you: I had a mind to bring you to my house before I told you your happiness, which ought now to be so much the dearer to you as it has cost you so much perplexity. To atone for all your afflictions, comfort yourself with the joy of being in the company of those who ought to be dearest to you. While you are dressing yourself, I shall acquaint your mother, who is beyond measure impatient to see you; and will likewise bring to you your son, whom you saw at Damascus, and for whom you showed so much affection without knowing him. No words are sufficient to express the joy of Bedreddin when he saw his mother and his son. These three embraced, and showed all the transports which love and tenderness can inspire. The mother spoke to Bedreddin in the most moving terms; she mentioned the grief she had felt for his long absence, and the tears she had shed. Little Agib, instead of flying his father's embraces as at Damascus, received them with ail the marks of pleasure; while his father, divided between two objects so worthy of his love, thought he could not give sufficient proofs of his affection.

In the mean time Schemseddin went to the palace to give an account of the happy success of his travels to the sultan, who was so charmed with the recital, that he ordered it to be taken down in writing, and to be preserved among the archives of his kingdom. After Schemseddin's return to his house, having prepared a noble feast, he sat down at the table with his family, and all his household passed the day in social conviviality.

The vizier Giafar having made an end of the story of Bedreddin Hassan, told the Caliph Haroun Alraschid, that this was what he had to relate to his majesty. The caliph found the story so surprising, that, without further hesitation, he granted his slave Rihan's pardon, and to condole the young man for the grief of having unhappily deprived himself of a woman whom he loved so tenderly, he married him to one of his slaves, bestowed liberal gifts upon him, and entertained him until he died.

But, sir, said Scheherazade, observing that day began to appear, though the story I have how told you be agreeable, I have one that is even much more so. If your majesty will please to hear it the next night, I am certain you will be of the same mind. Schahriar rose without giving any answer, and was in a quandary what to do. The good sultaness, said he within himself, tells very long stories; and when once she begins one, there is no refusing to hear it out. I cannot tell whether I shall put her to death to-day or not. No, surely not, I will do nothing rashly: the story she promises is perhaps more diverting than those she has yet told, and I will not deprive myself of the pleasure of hearing it. Dinarzade did not fail to awake the sultaness of the Indies, who thus commenced her story.

THE STORY OF THE LITTLE HUNCH-BACK.

There was in former times at Casgar, upon the utmost borders of Tartary, a tailor who had a pretty wife, whom he ardently loved, and by whom he was loved in return. One day, as he sat at work, a little hunch-back my lord came and sat down at the shop-door, began singing, at same time playing upon a tabor. The tailor was pleased to hear him, and had a strong mind to take him to his house to make his wife merry: This little fellow, said he to his wife, will divert us both very agreeably. In fine, he invited my lord, who readily accepted of the invitation; the tailor then shut up his shop, and conducted him in. The little gentleman being arrived at the tailor's house, his wife covered the table, and they sat down to sup on a good large dish of fish; but as they ate heartily, the little crooked gentleman unluckily swallowed a large bone, of which he died in a few minutes, notwithstanding all the tailor and his wife could do to prevent it. Both were mightily frightened at the accident, especially as it happened in their house; and there was reason to fear, that if the justiciary magistrates should hear of it, they would be punished as assassins. The husband, however, found an expedient to get rid of the corpse: recollecting that there was a Jewish doctor who lived just by, he formed a project, to execute which, his wife and he took the corpse, the one by the feet and the other by the head, and carried it to the physician's house. They knocked at the door, from which ascended a steep pair of stairs to his chamber. As soon as they bad knocked, the servant-maid came down without any light; and, opening the door, asked what they wanted. Pr'ythee, go up again, said the tailor, and tell your master we have brought him a man that is very sick, and wants his advice. Here, putting a piece of money into her hand, give him that beforehand, to convince him that we have no mind to make him lose his labour. While the servant was gone up to acquaint her master with the welcome news, the tailor and his wife nimbly conveyed the hunch-backed corpse to the head of the stairs; and, leaving it there, ran off.

In the mean time, the maid, having told the doctor that a man and a woman staid for him at the door, desiring he would come down and look upon a sick man they had brought with them, and the maid clapping the money she had received into his hand, the doctor was transported with joy; being paid beforehand, he thought it was a good job, and should not be neglected. Light, light! cried he to the maid; follow me nimbly. However, without staying for the light, he got to the stair-head in such haste, that stumbling against the corps, he gave it such a kick, as made it tumble down quiite to the stair-foot, and with difficulty saved himself. A light, a light! cried he to the maid, quick, quick! at last the maid came with a light, and he went down stairs with her; but when he gav that the stumbling-block he had kicked down was a dead man, he was so frightened, that he invoked Moses, Aaron, Joshua, and Esdras, and all the other prophets of his law. Unhappy man that I am! said he, what induced me to come down without a light? I have e'en made an end of the fellow who was brought to me to be cured? I am undoubtedly the cause of his death, and unless, Esras's ass[Footnote: Here the Arabian author ridicules the Jews: this ass is that which, as the Mahometans believe, Esdras rode upon when he came from the Babylonian captivity to Jerusalem.] comes to assist me, I nm ruined: mercy on me, they will be here instantly, and drag me from my house as a murderer! But, notwithstanding the perplexity and jeopardy he was in, he had the precaution to shut his door, lest any one passing by in the street should observe the mischance, of which he reckoned himself the author. He then took the corpse into his wife's chamber, upon which she swooned away. Alas! cried she, we are utterly ruined! undone! undone! unless we fall upon some expedient or other to turn the corpse out of our house this night! Beyond all question, if we harbour it till morning, our lives must pay for it. What a sad mischance is this! Why, how did you kill this man? That is not the question, replied the Jew; our business now is to find out a remedy for such a shocking accident. They then consulted together how to get rid of the corpse that night. The doctor racked his brain in vain; he could not think of any stratagem to get clear: but his wife, who was more fertile in invention, said, there is a thought come into my head; let us carry.the corpse to the leads of our house, and tumble it down the chimney into the house of the Mussulman, our next neighbour. This Mussulman, or Turk, was one of the sultan's purveyors for furnishing oil, butter, and