Shadows of the Past by Kayla Stiles (buy e reader txt) 📕

The Last Time I Saw my Father

1/19/12

The last time I saw my father,
It was the middle of the night.
He woke me out of a slumber
And told me to say good bye
To my mother.
I was 4 years old at the time,
So I didn’t know any better.
He picked me up and took me out
To his car.
As I passed by my mother,
I told her, “Bye-bye mommy.”
Her face glistened with tears.
My father put me in my car seat
And went back to get my brother.
The door was locked, so he went through
The living room window.
I heard a fight and my mother screaming
At him.
A few moments later he came out,
Holding the bundle that was my infant brother
In his arms.
He put my brother in his car seat,
Then sat behind the wheel for a second,
As though deliberating and thinking over what he had done.
Then he started the car and drove to a nearby motel.
We got to the room and I asked to watch the TV
That was hanging from the ceiling
Across from the end of the bed.
Daddy said no, that I had to sleep.
He placed me and my infant brother
In the bed together.
The last time I remember seeing my father,
Was when I got up to go to the bathroom
To the right of the bed.
My father was sleeping on the floor
In front of the bathroom door.
I accidentally stepped on him.
I haven’t seen him since
That dreadful night.
Not since he fled
To Pennsylvania.
But I do think about him a lot.
And that…was the last time
That I saw my father.

Love

Love is like waiting for
Plants to grow.
It either takes forever to happen,
Or doesn’t happen at all.
At least, that’s how it goes
With me.
For some it’s true, and for
Others it’s false, like with me.

Love is False

Love is like a helping hand, grasping you and pulling you away from the hate of the world.
But, it can also be like a thorny vine, releasing you just as you reach the cliff.
All this means is that some people are lucky to receive true love and others fall for false love and pay dearly for it.

The Monster Within

1/21/11

You may not be able to break my blackened, shattered heart
But I sure as hell can shatter and destroy yours.
Don’t touch me, you’ll burn yourself.
Don’t try to get close, I’ll tear you apart.
I’ll take you down to Hell, I’ll give you many tours
Of the deepest, darkest corner of Hell itself.
For I am Hell itself, and, in the end, at the end of the day,
You’ll be lying at my feet, covered in blood, dead.
Don’t try to love me, you’ll never love a monster like me.
I refuse to ask you not to leave, to beg you to stay.
Because I know I’m only gonna destroy you, crush your gentle little head.
I will torture you, I will kill you inside and I’ll NEVER hear your plea.
Goodbye! *slice*

The Murder

11/9/11

There she is, lying on the ground,
In the middle of the woods,
Naked and alone under the bright white light of the full moon,
Hidden from sight by dense shrubbery
And closely grown trees.
Blood drips sluggishly from the gunshot wound
In her shattered breast,
From the slash marks
On her wrists.
No one shall find her
As she stares blankly up at the tree tops.
The whites of her eyes
Eerily glowing in the moonlight.
Her hands rest at her sides,
Forever frozen in their final
Scrabbling motion of trying to cling to
The last glimmer of life.
Her eyes remain open wide
In their final attempt to see
The last bit of light at the end of the black tunnel.
There’re scratches on her body
From her struggle with her killer,
As she fought with him for her life.
There’s blood between her legs,
From a violent rape just before her death.
As the sun slowly rises into the sky,
Glinting off of the silver pentacle around her neck,
Flies begin to swarm around her body,
Laying eggs in her bloody breast and
By her white, unseeing eyes.
A curious raccoon smells the rusty odor
Of her blood, and approaches her cautiously.
He sniffs at her exposed corpse,
Likes the smell,
Lightly tastes the blood on her chest,
Then begins to slowly nibble on her hands.
Days pass,
Her body is slowly eaten away by maggots
And hungry animals.
Her disappearance goes unnoticed,
Even by her own family.
Nobody thinks anything of
The fact that she’s been gone for weeks.
The animals and maggots are her only company.
As time goes by, the animals eat away the last
Shreds of flesh on her body.
All that’s left is a pile of bones,
In the middle of the woods.
The only thing left to show
She was there.
After a year of being dead,
A hiker finally stumbles on her desecrated skeleton.
Finally, the story of this girl’s demise comes to light.
But her killer is never caught.
She is never given peace,
Nor is she ever shown a quiet resting place.
Her body is buried in the very place it was found.
She is never given rest.
She is never given resolution.

My Daddy

1/18/12

She’s a couple years old.
She sits perched on her father’s
Strong shoulders.
It’s just her, her mother, and her father.
They’re at a street fair.
They’re all laughing and having a good time.
Another flashback arrives.
She’s still around the same age.
She’s sitting in her dad’s car.
Her parents sit in the front seat.
Snow surrounds them.
These are the happy days the 17 year old
Remembers with her father.
Unfortunately, they’re just snips of memories.
But she cherishes them with everything she has.
It’s all that she has left of her father.
Looking back now, she regrets how she was
At that young age. She regrets being so naïve
That she took everything for granted.
Looking back on it now,
She wishes she could go back,
And spend as much time with her father
As she possibly could. She wishes she could
Be the daughter he wanted,
Be the one to keep him from leaving.
She wishes… she could tell him… that she loves him.

My Death

Watch me burn, watch me cry,
Watch me motherfucking DIE!
Hear me scream, hear my cries,
Hear my motherfucking LIES!
You people always look at me as though I’m just some FREAK!
You’ve never even met me yet I hear your rumors LEAK!
You think you know what I’m about but let me tell you something.
You have yet to realize that I can torture you and KILL you!
So shut your stupid lying mouths and just for once, let me BE