Harder to Hold by D'razhane Woods (brene brown rising strong .txt) 📕

"Malorie!" Klayton calls.

"Shut up!" I yell back as I search for something else to watch.

"Get down here!"

I groan, what could he possibly want from me? I regetablly get up and make my way downstairs and into the kitchen where I hear them all. There are two gilrs here who I recognize as Bethnay and Juliana from school. Ugh, I was trying to get rid of these people! Now I have to see them at home to?

Bethnay is wearing a blue jean mini skirt, revealing too much skin to be comfortable and a yellow sleevless top. Her light brown hair is curled down to the tops of her shoulders, and her brown eyes are lighter than usual from the excessive amount of mascara. Her freckles seem darker as if she colored them in, which I wouldn't doubt, and she wears red lipstick as the finishing touch.

Juliana is wearing a very short orange dress that flares out on her light brown thighs and reveals an unncesarry amount of cleavage. Her black hair is up in singled boxed braids and wears them down inches below the middle of her small back. Her lips are plump and strickingly pink and she has the eyes the color of maple syrup. They're both bery beautiful girls, but they exploit their bodies in ways I never could. Brandon is up on the wall while Juliana leans her body against him, and Klayton is standing in between Bethnay's wide open thighs as she sits on the counter. Does she have no manners at all when it comes to someone elses house?

"I don't know why you thought you could hide the note mom left for us," he explains. "Now order the pizza Mal, we're starving."

I fold my arms across my chest. "Order your own pizza. I'm sure you have enough money in your lttle piggy bank."

"Alright then," Brandon jumps in. "Why don't you come over here and reach into my pocket and grab my wallet?" He gives me an seductive smirk.

I raise an eyebrow at him. "I'm the wrong person you should be asking that question whith a girl latched up on your arm."

"Why? Cause you'd steal me too?" He laughs and Klayton joins in with him.

Tempted to bash his head into the wal, I ignore him and look into the fridge. I'm unsurprised to see a bottle of Paul Massuen and a box of beer and I think to myself for a moment. I don't usually drink, but anything would help to keep my mind off Graves and inhance my mood. I square my shoulders and broaden my confidence and take the shot bottle. It has forty percent of alcohol in it and I should wait to eat pizza before I drink it, but I'm too impatient. This is going to hit my system like an earthquake and I gotta say, I'm a bit excited about it. Not caring that they could be looking, I take a good swig and try not to think about the taste as the burning sensation slithers down my throat because I'm seconds away from barfing it all up. The liquid fire is so strong it cause my face to grimace and chills grow throught my body. I cough in distaste and hold myself together because if I don't, there's no telling what's going to happen. I immediately feel the alcohol crshing down into my stomach, and I know it's not going to be long before it has consumed a part of me. I've dranken a quater size of the bottle, yet it's not that big but it's going to hit me all the same.

"Damn Malorie!" Brandon shouts. "Now that's what I'm talking about!"

"I would have never thought Malorie had the guts to do that," Bethnay says, impressed.

I continue to grab a bottle of beer from the fridge and remembering that I need to get in the shower, I head upstaris to the bathroom, drink up a good amount of beer and hop in. The water is hot, but I don't mind it. My body slowly begins to feel lighter and my limbs a little looser. The last time I had got drunk, I was with Kara and we had locked ourselves in her bedroom drinking a whole bunch of alcohol. I had immediately regretted it the next moring and vowed to myself to never do it again. So much for that.

When I'm all scrubbed up and freshly clean, I got to my room and change into black sweat pants and a white tank top. I need to at least be comfortable if I'm going to get drunk tonight. I just hope I have enough common sense to stay in my room and not come out until tomorrow. I grab my Moto-E cell phone and provide myself wit some music. I'm pretty diverse so my music varies from pop, hip-hop, rock, country, etc. Right now I settle for some light rock and relax on my bed. I finish off the can of beer I grabbed and I notice that the more I drink the more the room starts spinning. Maybe taking that big shot of Paul Massuen wasn't the best of ideas. Unfortunatley, it's too late for me to take it all back and I feel the shift of my mood changing. I don't want to be along anymore. I shold order some pizza. I order one supreme and the other peperoni and wait for it to arrive.

I get up from my bed and go back downstairs to grab myself another can of beer. I like the way it's making me feel, even though the taste isn't great, but it's tolerable. Klayton, Bethnay, Brandon and Juliana are now sitting at the table having a deep conversation, unaware of my arrival. Minutes pass and the pizza is here (I'm pretty sure that's record timing) and I pay for it using the twenty Tallah had given me and giving the change to the pizza guy. I bring the food into the kitchen and set it on the table.

"It's about freaking time," Kalyton says and is the first on to grab two of the biggest pizzas each.

I take one of each before they dominate it all, using a napkin to hold and walk into the living room, taking my place onto the couch, collapsing on weak legs in the process. I grab the remote from the wooden marbled table and put my feet on top, getting comfortable. I pick on a random movie to watch and fidn it difficult to hold my head up, so I allow it to sag back as I eat my pizza, staring up at the spinning ceiling. I hum a melody to myself completely off and not caring either.

"Malorie, what are you doing?" Klayton says from behind me, not souding too proud, as if he ever is of me.

I ignore him and drink up my second beer, but now I've lost my apetite to finishing my pizza. My stomach can't take anymore food even though I've had about three bites. I'm feeling a little bit out of it but at the same time, it feels good. I don't need Klayton ruining my mood so I get up on wobbly legs and pass Kalyton back into the kitchen and into the fridge for another beer. I have no sense of equilibruim.

Klayton has followed me. "What are you doing?" He asks again more sternly.

"I'm ge-getting...drunk," I speak with a giggle. It's hard trying to form a coherent sentence, but it's pretty hilarious while trying to do so.

"I don't want you getting drunk," he says seriously.

"I don't care what you want," I say in a sing-song voice and realize that it's easier for me this way. I wonder if I can go the rest of the night singing. It'll be like my own personal musical.

I brush past him, swaying my way back to the living room and see that Brandon has taken my place. Shouldn't he be with Juliana? I plop down beside him, my mood too bright to care and he puts an arm around my shoulders, holding me close to his side. I can smell the alcohol coming off of him, but I could care less I'm sure I smell the same.

"You're getting drunk tonight?" He asks, his face only inches away from mine, and the nearness of his body is making me feel the complete oppsite of what I felt for him earlier today. His body heat feels so good against mine and I want so much to mold it together into one.

I move even closer and if I were to move any further, our lips would meet. I always thought he had some pretty juicy lips. "What are yor plans for tonight Brandon?" I say no louder than a whisper

"I've got a lot of plans tonight honey, would you like to be one of them?" His other arm wraps around my torso and he pulls me towards him,chest against chest, and my breathing becomes more harsh, my heart in hyper speed. The area between my legs begin to tingle as my left hand moves to his chisled cheek, caressing his skin.

I can't even remember the last time I've wanted him this badly. Now I want him all over me in ways I can't even explain. "Get rid of Juliana."

"Done," he says without a problem.

A new presence arrives in the room and speaks. "What the hell?"

I look in the direction of the kitchen and see Klayton standing there in the hall seperating the two rooms. His brown eyes are wide in shock, but I am unfazed. "Will you go...g-get me anouther beeeeeer?" I release a small burp. "I'm thirsty." I know I shouldn't have anymore to drink, but it's doing a pretty good job keeping my mind distracted.

"Are you insane?" He questions. "I really think you should slow your road Mal, cause if you don't I know that you'll regret it if you don't already."

"Oh shut up," I respond sloppily, getting agitated. Leave it to him to veer my mind back towards Graves talknig about regret. All I want to do is forget about him, but his orange eyes are tattooed into my head, his tough permanently lingering on my skin. The thought of him alone makes it feel as if someone is tickling my stomach with a knife, my butterflies are that strong. Or is that even normal? I can't take it knowing that I don't have him anymore.

"Come on, let her have some drinks have fun," Bethnay says, coming up behind Klayton. "I can't say I blame her for everything. Graves is friggin' hot. I mean seriously. What guy has orange eyes like that? That's pure perfection.'

Is she being serious?

"Then why don't you go and sleep with him then," Klayton says angrily.

She just smirks and says nothing more.

"Malorie," Klayton continues. "Look at what you're doing to yourself. You're acting crazy."

He's realling killing my vibe. "Let me be c-crazy then!"

"No dammit! I'm your older brother and I'm supposed to look after you!"

I laugh histerically. "Since when d-did you decide...that you cared? You sir...have made it! You're mission to de-destroy me, why stop now?" I climb off of Brandon and Juliana suddenly emerges from the bathroom down the hall.

"What did I miss?" She asks, completely clueless to the situation.

On wobbly legs, I struggle my way past them and on my hands and knees, climb up the stairs. In my state there's no doubt I would tumble to my doom trying to walk up. I crawl into my room and use my butt to close the door, and then grab my phone from the dresser. Without a second thought, I dial Graves' number and he answers on the third ring.

"Hello?"

"Graves," I breathe out seductively with a smile. "It's s-s-o