Scars by Brooklynn (bill gates books recommendations .txt) 📕

of emotions it was hard NOT to read. Pain.. Hatred... Love.. Hurt.. While me and Skyler were wrapped up in sheets full of pure hormones and for me .. one big ass hard on. Her eyes got glossy, and I felt terrible. "Kim-" I started but she just cut me off with a really strong, powerfully, couldnt care less if she said it, "Fuck. You.", followed by the slam of a door that I swear shoke the bed we were in, and not in a good way. I wanted to burst into tears but I couldnt. I was to shocked that she even said that. Did Kimberly like me? Why would she care if she didnt... I took her off my mind, and started things with Skyler again. We finshed. And the only I regretted was Releasing inside her with no condom on... but I think she told me she was on the pill. I smiled to myself and just cuddled into her as she lay there beside me. I couldnt stop smiling... until Kimmy's sobs erupted through our window, and I knew she was crying really hard for them to be that loud. I got up and put on my boxers, jeans and a bottom up plaid shirt, and didnt bother to do up the bottoms. Skyler bit her lip was she watched me. I smiled and laughed as she blushed. Then she got up, her hair instantly laying over her boobs. She picked up her red panties and a white tank top. She slipped them on, and that was it. She just climbed back into bed before winking at me. I crawled in next to her and smiled. She cuddled into my chest and I kissed her forehead. I smiled to myself again, only for it to instantly turn into a frown when more sobs erupted through the window. There was also a few gasps and squeaks that had me worried. Skyler had fallen asleep in my arms, so I kissed her forehead, brushing the hair away from her face, and slipped out of bed. I stepped up to the window. I drew back the curtains and peeked out slightly. Kimmy was crying and snotting and shaking, the works. The water around her was red tinged, and I knew she had been cutting. I had huntch when I heard the gasps and squeaks, but now I knew. I wanted to punch a wall. Look what I did to her! I was hating myself for this. I looked back at the water just as Kimmy dived into it. Bubbles were rising in the top of the pool as I watched her not pop up for about a minute and a half. I was getting worried, and it scared me. But she popped up, and I closed my eyes in relief. That is until I heard choking and splashing and coughing and gaging. I looked out the window to see Kimmy gasping and trying to tred water with one arm. She went under, poping back up and choking again. My feet were moving faster than I was because I was jetting down the stairs and out to the pool. When I got there, Kimmy was fully under water, not moving any direction but down. I took off my shirt and dove into the water after her. I wrapped my arm around her waist as the other was under her thigh, lifting her closer to me and I kicked towards the surface. When my head popped out I was the only one taking a breath because her body was limp under my touch. I swam a little way over to the edge of the pool. I lifted her body up and layed it on the smooth tiled deck before using my upper body strength and pushing myself up to kneel on the deck beside her. "Kimmy" I shoke her shoulders lightly. "Kimmy you have to wake up, please you really need to wake up" I said shaking her again. Tears were streaming down my face and I over looked her body that was slightly pale. "You have to wake up, please, I love you, you have to wake up" My voice cracked as I said it. I pushed my palms over her heart 5 times and she spit out water that hit my face. "Why do I have to wake up again?" she said groggily. My eyes shot open and I smiled. "Kimmy!" I enveloped her in a hug, leaning her up and over my body as she straddled my waist. I cuddled her in my arms, she smelt good, but odd. Like strawberries and cherries but also and odd metal smell that I knew was blood. Still, I didnt want to let go of her as I wrapped my arms around her waist and she hugged my neck. What started as a hug didnt end that way because I leaned in and pecked her lips. It took her a few second to react before she pressed her whole body into mine, making my moan into her mouth as our lips moved together. She licked my bottom lip and I spread my mouth open, taking her tongue in my teeth before licking it with my own. She moaned into my mouth this time, and I held her waist gently and her hips grinded into my slightly. She was amazing at this! I couldnt even beileve it, I wanted all of her. I traced little circles on her hips and she placed one hand on my chest and the other around my neck, licking all around my mouth, pressing deeper into me. I pulled back for a breath and smiled at her. Her breathing was just as heavy and rapid as mind. "Were the hell did you learn to kiss like that?" I asked her, my breathing heavy but slowing down. She giggled and kissed my cheek and nose. "I dont know, I guess it just comes naturally" She smiled. I smiled back and we just looked at eachother for a long period of time. Her face went serious as a smile played at the corners of her lips. "You saved my life" she said warmly. "I was trying" I said seriously. "Thank you..." she whispered lightly into my ear as she nuzzled my neck. When she kissed it, I bite my lip, wanting her grinding into me and holding me again. And she was only in a bra and panties! My god Kimmy what are you doing to me. What I felt with Kimmy I didnt feel with Skyler. And I was deciding weather I liked it or not when Kimmy started sucking on my neck making me moan again. My decision was made, I fucking liked it. I gently pulled her lips to mine, moving them sync with hers, and I licked her tongue and held her hips. She started pressing deeper into my, grinding so slightly that I wouldnt feel it if it wasnt for how hard she was doing it. I nibbled on her lip, catching her tongue in my teeth once again before sucking on it with my lips. She moaned softly into my mouth, and i almost didnt hear it. But I still smiled. She wrapped both her arms around my neck this time, smiling against my lips before kissing my long and hard, then pulling away. "Kimmy I really like you" I told her, hoping she wouldnt reject me. "I like you too... but.." she started but looked away, her eyes glossy. I cracked. Seeing her cry made me get all teary eyed. "But what about Skyler Clay?, I JUST seen you and her loose your selves in eachother" She said wiping her eyes. I didnt know what to say. I was so lost for words I might as well have been stone. Sighing completely annoyed with myself, I looked at her. "Im dating Skyler, I wont stop dating Skyler, but that doesnt change how I feel about you Kimmy. Its like if you were dating Mickey, and you liked him, obviously, but would you dump him flat with no reason, just because you liked me more. It would crush him, just like it would crush Skyler." I told her. She looked away, her eyes falling with tears. I put both my hands on her cheeks and pulled her to look at me. "It doesnt change anything. I can like two people, and you, are always going to be one of them" I said. She looked away again. "And Kimmy... please dont cut yourself over me. Ever." I said, drawing her eyes back to me. "No promises". She said. I kissed her long and hard, roaming my hands over her body as she kissed back at the last second before I pulled away. She groaned in fustration. I laughed. It was fun teasing her, even though she absolutely hated it. She narrowed her eyes at me and I smiled. "Stop teasing me! Or i'll tease back" She said huffing in fustration. Thinking of the ways she could tease me turned me on, but I quickly put them out of my mind and smiled. "Okay, no more teasing" I told her and leaned in. Just before our lips touched, I rolled us over so I was on top and kissed her cheek. Smirking at another groan in fustration she made, I stood up and walked back into the house smiling like an idiot. My clothes were half soaked from her, and there was blood on the back of my neck from where her arm was. I rubbed the back of it and looked at my hand. She cut more than once, the blood was a lot. Sighing I went to the bathroom upstairs and locked the door behind me. I stripped out of my clothes and noticed a had a sight hard on. "Fuck... she really got me going" I said and I turned on the shower to cold and got in. I stood there my chest puffed out asI let the water droplets roll down my body. It was melting hot outside so the cold water wasnt even really cold, but boy was I relieved when my little hard on went all the way down. I grabbed some body was and squirtd it into my palm and scrubbed my body. I rubbed my chest and them scrubbed the back of my neck. The water turned pink and swirled down the drain. When I was washed and ready I still didnt get out. I was wondering if I should cut... release the stress and thoughts that are all bundled in my head, but I didnt. I just kissed Kimmy, and I really liked it. Im dating Skyler still... me and Skyler lost out virginities together... holy fucking hell im so confused. I just turned off the water after another rinse of water over my face, and stepped out. I stood infront of the mirror with a towel wrapped around my waist, clutching the edge of the sink below it. Lots of things were going through my mind. I never really looked in the mirror. I mean to fix my hair, and such, but really look into the mirror, and focus on myself, I've never been able to do it. Looking at myself I always get disgusted, and start thinking hateful thoughts right before I cut myself. Going through rough times when I was younger, I remembered something my mother told me. "If you can look in the mirror, and count backwards from 10, and bear to look at yourself, then you are truley happy living". I could hear her sweet gentle voice ringing in my ears making my lips smile but my eyes frown. Was I happy with living right now? I felt my stomach flutter as Kimmy's face smiled through my head. Shouldnt it be Skyler im happy about? I didnt know. What I needed was a serious