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Remembering Altair

By

Rob Astor
Ā© 2010 by Rob Astor


This is a collection of lyrical poetry inspired by the recent sudden loss of the person I was most close to in this whole world. Every part is a glimpse or a picture of a feeling or a frustration while I continue to wade through the unsure aftermath of her passing. Writing all these lyrics has been helpful for me to hold onto moments and crystallize certain memories. I donā€™t know yet if itā€™s been cathartic. What I do know is this collection poured from my soul like a deluge. At some point in time, I want to sing these. Iā€™ve known my writerā€™s voice for many, many years. The next journey I undertake will be finding my inner voice.


Youā€™re Not Here With Me
Stardust Speedway
Calliope Dreams
Dry Lindsey's Tears
Gravy Train
Man In The Hole
Heart Of The Storm
Gomorrah & Sodom
The Dragon Is Real
Face In The Mirror
Jingle, Jangle, Jingle
Rainy Day CafƩ
Bring On The Rain
Voice No Longer Heard
Written In The Sky
Precious Melancholy
Walking With Ghosts
Bridge To Your Star
Too Afraid To Fly
I Have To Write Another Song
Escape Clause
Angry Letter To God
Summerland
Not Qualified
Infinite Loop
The Spiral
Dark River To Antares
Silent Rage
Playing With Fire
Highway To Nowhere
Go Away
Today Is Only Thursday
The Black Pearl
Tempest
Willow Bend
Donā€™t Tell Me No
Chase The Dream

Summer Rain On Ganymede
The Long Run


Youā€™re Not Here With Me
July 28, 2010

Everything was supposed to be perfect forever
I didnā€™t sign up for separation
Iā€™ve been looking for your face in all those places we used to go
The summer downpour is never ending
And the distant thunder is rumbling
Why is it that new beginnings always start off so slow

When does the sun rise if I feel like thereā€™s no tomorrow
Can the moon shine forever if I illuminate my sorrow

Youā€™re not here with me
The rain is never ending
Youā€™re not here with me
The pain is unforgiving
Nothing can ever bring you back to me
Even if I fell down upon my knees
No matter how hard I cry
No one bargains with time
Now I walk through fading memories
ā€˜Cause youā€™re not here with me

Thereā€™s a touch of sunshine in the golden leaves
Fragrance carried on the breeze
Lilacs, roses, impatiences, and marigolds
How am I ever supposed to get on with my life
Stars turn toward blue twilight
Summer fades and everything withers in winterā€™s cold

When does the sun rise if I feel like thereā€™s no tomorrow
Can the moon shine forever if I illuminate my sorrow

Youā€™re not here with me
The rain is never ending
Youā€™re not here with me
The pain is unforgiving
Nothing can ever bring you back to me
Even if I fell down upon my knees
No matter how hard I cry
No one bargains with time
Now I walk through fading memories
ā€˜Cause youā€™re not here with me

You were the bright center of my universe
Now Iā€™m the black hole at the center of a galaxy of hurt
I might remember to count all my blessings
If it didnā€™t feel like the world was falling apart all around me

Youā€™re not here with me
The rain is never ending
Youā€™re not here with me
The pain is unforgiving
Nothing can ever bring you back to me
Even if I fell down upon my knees
No matter how hard I cry
No one bargains with time
Now I walk through fading memories
ā€˜Cause youā€™re not here with me

The summer downpour is never ending


Stardust Speedway
July 16, 2010

Am I runninā€™
Away from my life
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
ā€˜Cause Iā€™m never coming back

City streets flash by
A diamond field of neon lights
Lightning fills the sky
Hurricane raging deep inside
Written words
Spoken softly
Sometimes never heard
Seems like nothing here defines my life

Iā€™m gonna keep on drivinā€™
Keep on drivinā€™
Speeding down Stardust Speedway
Gotta find my own way
Find my own way

Am I runninā€™
Am I runninā€™
Away from my life
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Sailing down Stardust Speedway
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
ā€˜Cause Iā€™m never cominā€™ back

Cloudy moonlit night
I only shined within your glow
Youā€™re outta my sight
Donā€™t know where to turn, where to go
Singing songs
Seldom sung
If I knew how long
Iā€™d kickstart destinyā€™s manna flow

Iā€™m gonna keep on drivinā€™
Keep on drivinā€™
Speeding down Stardust Speedway
Gotta find my own way
Find my own way

Am I runninā€™
Am I runninā€™
Away from my life
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Flying down Stardust Speedway
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
ā€˜Cause Iā€™m never cominā€™ back

Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Keep on drivinā€™
Orionā€™s rising south and east
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Keep on drivinā€™
Archerā€™s arrow leading the pack
Keep on drivinā€™
Keep on drivinā€™
And Iā€™m never coming back

Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Tearing down Stardust Speedway
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
A diamond field of neon lights
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Thereā€™s a hurricane raging tonight
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Orion risinā€™
Tearing up Stardust Speedway
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
While Orionā€™s risinā€™
Am I runninā€™
Am I runninā€™
Away from my life
Am I runninā€™
Am I runninā€™
Zooming down Stardust Speedway
Gonna keep on drivinā€™
Keep on drivinā€™
ā€˜Cause Iā€™m never coming back


Calliope Dreams
July 22 - 25, 2010

The ā€œCement Mixerā€
Gear grinding sound
Stock car racing
Horses running at Cedar Downs
ā€œDriving Miss Daisyā€
Carousel spinning
Crossing covered bridges
In a Cadillac from yester-century

Pipe organs and snare drums sounding off calliope dreams
Hear that Merry-Go-Round music
Playing ā€œCome Josephine, In My Flying Machineā€
I can stroll along the beach with you at Lake Erie
But music and the universe will never bring you back to me
So I walk wide awake right into these calliope dreams

Warm stuffed Snoopy
ā€œField Of Dreamsā€
Cotton candy and caramel apples
Corn dogs and onion rings
Videos all night long
Remember the garage sale queens
Should memory fade away
Weā€™ll go ā€œDancing On The Ceilingā€

Pipe organs and snare drums sounding off calliope dreams
Hear that Merry-Go-Round music
Playing ā€œCome Josephine, In My Flying Machineā€
I can stroll along the beach with you at Lake Erie
But music and the universe will never bring you back to me
So I walk wide awake right into these calliope dreams

Pipe organs and snare drums sounding off calliope dreams
Hear that Merry-Go-Round music
Playing ā€œCome Josephine, In My Flying Machineā€
I can stroll along the beach with you at Lake Erie
But music and the universe will never bring you back to me
So I walk wide awake right into these calliope dreams


Dry Lindseyā€™s Tears
September 22 - 27, 2010

Daisyā€™s imagination gave them life
Real as real in Daisyā€™s sight
Today
Theodore and Lindsey came by to play
Much to their dismay
Everything faded away
They discovered Daisy Mae
Left for Heaven yesterday

She didnā€™t mean to leave them behind
Perhaps sheā€™ll come back again in time

Sing a song of love for Daisy
But nothing can be said to dry Lindseyā€™s tears
Write a story and keep her memory
But nothing can replace all the years
Of laughter and joy spent in her loving arms
Funny how in a broken heart
All is cold that once was warm
Remember Daisyā€™s smiling eyes
Remember to keep her star in the sky
Fly with her hand-in-hand
Fly away to Neverland
Remember the whisper of love that you hear
Nothing can be said to dry Lindseyā€™s tears

Daisy kept her motherā€™s love in the Morning Star
A few minutes away, never too far
Last night
Theodore and Lindsey lost their sight
They sit silent now
Their lights have gone out
Marionettes frozen in time
Motionless lifeless mimes

She didnā€™t mean to leave them behind
Theyā€™ll always be together within her mind

Sing a song of love for Daisy
But nothing can be said to dry Lindseyā€™s tears
Write a story and keep her memory
But nothing can replace all the years
Of laughter and joy spent in her loving arms
Funny how in a broken heart
All is cold that once was warm
Remember Daisyā€™s smiling eyes
Remember to keep her star in the sky
Fly with her hand-in-hand
Fly away to Neverland
Remember the whisper of love that you hear
Nothing can be said to dry Lindseyā€™s tears


Gravy Train
July 9, 2010

Gambler, you know you got to choose
Sometimes they win but you know you always loose
Run off in your rage
Stop playinā€™ little boy games and act your age

You been ridinā€™ that gravy train
Boy you been ridinā€™ that gravy train

Lookinā€™ in the mirror and actinā€™ so vain
Want to see your face up on the front page
Knowing your place
Too shy to get on stage

You been ridinā€™ that gravy train
Boy you been ridinā€™ that gravy train
Sheriff saw easy money flow
Judge say easy come easy go
You been ridinā€™ that gray train
You been ridinā€™ that gravy train now boy you got to pay

Lost little child walkinā€™ through the rain
Dealing with your invisible pain
No eternal flame
Only you make everyone know your name

You been ridinā€™ that gravy train
Boy you been riding that gravy train
Cut off judge said boy now you got to pay
You been ridinā€™ that gravy train
Ridinā€™ that gravy train
You been ridinā€™ that gravy train judge said now boy you got to pay


Man In The Hole
September 19 - 20, 2010

You care too much about diamonds and shiny things
Much too egocentric to find out what life really means
You always bring people down when you fall
ā€˜Cause you never believe in good or that fortune will call

Hey-yo, man in the hole
Always waitinā€™ for someone to throw you a bone
But you donā€™t play well with anyone
And you canā€™t do it on your own
Much too busy to care about much of anything
Youā€™re gonna sail around the world alone in your boat
If only you believe life is better than you see
How far will you go when you end up all alone

Whatā€™s itā€™s gonna be like when she dumps you to the curb
How will you cope with another world of hurt
Cared too much for tarnished diamonds and pretty lacy things
Much too egocentric to find out what life really means

Hey-yo, man in the hole
Always waitinā€™ for someone to throw you a bone
But you donā€™t play well with anyone
And you canā€™t do it all on your own
Much too busy to learn about much of anything
Youā€™re gonna sail around the world alone in your boat
If only you believe life is better than you see
How far will you go when you wind up all alone

Listen to what Iā€™m tellinā€™ you now
You better save yourself somehow
If you really know everything
Make your world stop spinning

Hey-yo, man in the hole
You always think youā€™re entitled to that bone
But you donā€™t play well with anyone
And you know you canā€™t do it on your own
Youā€™re much too busy to learn much about anything

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